Why doesn't anyone help?

[YellowQT]

I posted a post last night about 70 people read it but only 2 bothered to help.

My boyfriend of a year just broek up with me for cheating on him again. I love him so much and can't get over him. I've been very suicidal and in the hospital because of it. I need him in my life. Hwo do i hlet him know i woudln't ever do it again, and how do i get him back in my life before its to late? I need him to live. Or i need to know how to get over him. PLEASE HELP!

[Dark]

nobody answers because it's obvious that if you loved him, you would never cheat on him. He's hurt and tries to get over you. So start doing that yourself. Would you forgive him if he cheated on you? NO!! So leave the poor guy alone. Hope you will never do the same mistake again with someone else!

[sweetie14]

ok. Well being sucidal isnt the way to help your problems. Trust me. I use to be sucidal when my first love broke up with me, and all it did was get him to think im crazy and not go out with me again. Ok do you blame your ex on not going out with you? When you cheat on someone...thats the worse way to lose the trust in a relationship. If you want him back and u truly would never cheat on him again, you cant just think hes gonna throw his love back at u too have it broken again. You have to sit him down and talk to him, tell him you love him with all your heart, and that you dont expect him to give you his heart again, but u hope that he can trust you again and maybe in the future yous can try again. Tell him you never wanted to hurt him, that hurting him is like hurting you. Its gonna take time just be patient. Wish u luck

[YellowQT]

but i would give him a chance. I love him so much, and hes already given me a second chance because i told him about the first time. We are friends now, but i need help! I would never do it again, but i need help to proove it.

[sweetie14]

ok like I said the only way to prove you love him, is to prove you changed, you messed up real bad, and now its time to talk to him. Become great friends then talk about goin out

[JonnyG]

You say u love him yet u have cheated on him twice. How long hav u even been out with him? Why r u tcheating on him if u love him?

 

Many people may hav not responded because they think the answer is pretty clear. But this forum is quite quiet so u don't get all that many answers. My first thread was about why girls go for bad guys, im sure lots of guys want to see some answers, but in the space of 3 days thats only had 4 responses.

[YellowQT]

Over 100 people have read this and only six people have offered advice 2 are from myself so only four?! Please help!

[Tinkerbell]

Okay, first of all try to calm down and get a grip. I know this is a hard time for you, but freaking out won't solve anything.

 

Your ex is probably in a great deal of pain right now since this is the second time you've betrayed him. Trust is very delicate, sometimes you can never get it back, and you have to accept this. He allowed himself to be vulnerable and gave you another chance, and you just went and hurt him again for god knows what reason.

 

Right now I think you should just lay off and gave him some space, I strongly doubt he'll believe in you again any time soon. Trying being friends, and if you really want him back in your life, change! Don't be the kind of girl who cheats on her boyfriend anymore! You might want to try and figure out why you did this if you're ever going to stop it from happening again. If you two are able to pursue a friendship, remember not to be too pushy and allow him to want to be back in your life without feeling pressured into it because he fears you'll commit suicide if you don't.

 

If you are truly serious and are really that desperate, I suggest you see your therapist/psychologist, whoever it is you saw before, and get help. Once you're in a better state maybe than you can get back together with him.

[fantasia2004]

nobody answers because it's obvious that if you loved him, you would never cheat on him. He's hurt and tries to get over you. So start doing that yourself. Would you forgive him if he cheated on you? NO!! So leave the poor guy alone. Hope you will never do the same mistake again with someone else!

 

Dark how could you be so brutal? The person has a problem and needs help?

[JonnyG]

Over 100 people have read this and only six people have offered advice 2 are from myself so only four?! Please help!

 

Yeah, well ive had 138 ppl view mine and only 4 reponses, and mine is a serious question which a lot of guys would like to know the answer to. Inc my ex leaving me to go back with her ex even tho i treated her like a princess and did nothing wrong, i didnt cheat on her twice or even once, i didnt do n e thing wrong, so how u think i feel, and many others here who have suffered like myself, and we havent had many responses.

[Spartan1]

My advice is the following:

 

You will not get him back in your present condition. Ex's do not respond to pressure. Your first step is to realise that although it feels like the end of the world - it isn't. If you want him back you have to show strength and confidence and give him space. Use this time away from him to sort yourself out. He will not return to someone who feels suicidal. That's a fact.

 

If you want him back. You have to re-build yourself bit by bit. That is my advice.

 

As for the forums, the views is not the number of people who look at your post, one person could look at the same post a dozen times and it will show 12 views. Many people post, not everyone gets replies, it depends on what people identify with and also how much time people have online. Think on it this way, have you replied to anyone else's posts?

 

I have faith in you. Be strong. Get off the suicide band wagon. Only then will you have a fighting chance of getting your ex back. I hope you succeed but you have to give him time and space for now. Do not be to hard on yourself, you know what you have done wrong, you know it was not right. Learn from this and re-build. We all make mistakes. Forgive yourself first and learn from it.

 

One of the ironies of this world, is where as you would forgive someone else for cheating, they are under no obligation to forgive you. It is irony because most of the highly principled people you come accross are often the ones who cheat but have not been found out. At the end of the day, you have to see this as a fresh start. An opportunity to put your cheating ways behind you, forgive yourself and move on and next time - you know not to cheat because you know what you can lose. Chances are you will find someone else, someone who will not hold your cheating against you. No one knows what the future holds and that is what you have to look forward to. A bright new future. And you never know - if your ex sees a happy new you he may come back, but don't make that your goal, see it as a bonus if he does.

 

Best of luck.

[sweetharmony]

yeah, please don't be upset about the two replies. I, too have had 0 replies on many of my topics w/ at least 75-100 people viewing. you're not alone. i'm sorry for you, but I'm also sorry for your ex. i don't mean to be cruel, but like others have said, he did give you a second chance and you betrayed that trust. i know you're in a lot of pain, but so is he and he needs time to cool off. you being suicidal will not hlep the situation at all. it may get him to come back temporarily, but again, temporarily, if that. he will not feel sorry for you at this time. remain calm, maybe check yourself into a hospital if you are very suicidal and get yourself help- talk to a counselor. things will get easier over time. i think he will have a very difficult time trusting you- esp. since he already gave you one chance. even if you did get back together, the pain and memories would linger and probably cause problems in the relationship. it will never be the same again, it was tainted. i would just say, get your life together, start anew and make sure you get help and don't cheat again. that's my advice. i wouldn't put up with that. he won't risk opening his heart to you again and i really can understand that. i'm sorry, i feel your pain, but this is the time to move on and start over. good luck.