meggiemoo72 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I guess those who are the ones on here who have never had bf/gfs (and all the rest) will understand when I say how you can be completely fine and normal and othing will seem a big deal but then all of a sudden you have these hideous days when you feel utterly lonely. I have already posted a thread on here baout myself etc but the main thing was, today was one of those days when I felt yucky. This place seemed very honest but understanding and kind so I felt like posting my thoughts. I saw this couple together today and they were UTTER cuteness and I felt like crying. I mean, it was LOVELY and such a heart warming sight but I felt so lonely.... The main thing, when I was out today, that made me think was... Guys are attracted to sex appeal and it's obvious that they need to be atractd to someone as a major ingredient and usually the first impression. This is a photo of me: link removed I am NOT sexy or flirty or ANYTHING like that and the TWO words people use for me are CUTE and NICE. I like being like this as HELL, it's better than being called something horrible. I wouldn't change, EVER, but I wonder because I'm interested in different things and not what normal girls my age are into and I dress a bit differently... I actually have no idea what I'm talking about! I guess I just limit myself because only a CERTAIn type of guy would like me....I mean, a guy who parties 24/7 and likes to drink loads woldn't like me and I don't think we'd be compatible either way and that's obvious but I don't know if because of the way I am (and I'm not saying im a freak, I'm just a bit different in some ways) that I'm limiting my scope anyway!! I mean, instead of going clubbing and getting drunk I'd rather go to a cute little tea room or a cool coffee shop and chat or go visit cities and sights and go to the theatre. I guess I just belong in the past.... Sorry if this is disjointed and silly, I felt really bleugh today and wondered if anyone else had worries like this..... Thanks so much xx Link to comment
Knight of Hope Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Hey there, Meg! This is a photo of me: link removed I looked at your picture. You probably don't want to hear this, but you are definitely cute! But that's the good meaning of cute, not the bad meaning. Some of us guys actually go for cute! Take me for example. What a lot of guys call "hot" I call "fake". They wear too much makeup, try too much to look great, and they end up looking snooty and act as if they're too good for most guys. Cute girls don't think about their appearance too much (they still try to look nice), and they usually seem so much more honest and real than lots of "hot" girls out there. Honestly, I would take a cute girl over a hot girl any day! I mean, instead of going clubbing and getting drunk I'd rather go to a cute little tea room or a cool coffee shop and chat or go visit cities and sights and go to the theatre. I guess I just belong in the past.... Same here! Don't worry... there are people like you out there who aren't part of the mainstream young adult society. That includes guys, too, not just girls. I personally would rather spend the afternoon in a quiet coffee shop and chat than go out and get drunk! I'm sure there are other guys like this, too. I guess I just limit myself because only a CERTAIn type of guy would like me....I mean, a guy who parties 24/7 and likes to drink loads woldn't like me and I don't think we'd be compatible either way and that's obvious but I don't know if because of the way I am (and I'm not saying im a freak, I'm just a bit different in some ways) that I'm limiting my scope anyway!! I think you're selling yourself short by thinking only that type of guy would like you, Meg. From what I've read of your post, you seem like a very nice girl, the type of girl I like to know and hang out with in real life. More often than not, you are the type of girl I go for. And I don't go to bars (only sometimes just to be social) or get drunk (ever). Believe me, Meg. We are out there! We're just a little harder to find than the partier type! So smile! It'll all work out. Link to comment
meggiemoo72 Posted August 28, 2009 Author Share Posted August 28, 2009 You just made me feel SO much better! Thank you for your lovely words. You know the kind of days I mean.... a guy at work asked me if I was a lesbian today because I hadn't had a boyfriend, how he found out I have no idea and I' not ashamed of it, I just would raher people didn't know that's all. I felt pretty upset after that but battled on.... haha! Just had one of those days and felt the need to vent....so thank you so much for making me smile after that and am sure you're RIGHT! There was this really cute guy in work today and I helped him find a book. He had good taste and I just said "oh great choice, it's a really good book, you have good taste" and he seemed really friendly and approachable and I wasn't even thinking about anything like flirting with him etc....would be stupid...I just, as a human being, felt like chatting to hi as I do with most customers. I get really enthusiastic about things and did about this book he was buying and he kinda looked at me as if i was weird and mumbled "ok thanks" and walked away. So yea today hasn't been good for being myself and it benefitting me in that sense! I guess, as you said, there ARE people out there that are perfect for us, just need finding!! I like to do loads of unusual things like knit (I run a knitting class with my friend), musicals, vintage clothing (In my photo I had a vintage 30s dress on and was in a seriously posh tea room with my friend-VERY happy!- link removed and link removed ) and folk/acoustic/soul/indie gigs. OBVIOUSLY I'm not alone in these interests but they're NOT mainstream.... Anyway, WISH he'd get a move on wherever he is!!!! ha! England, Ireland, Scotland, France, America, Germany....WHEREVER he is and whoever he is, seriously he needs to hurry up!!!!!! Link to comment
chinook86 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 First of all you are very cute(Take that as a sincere compliment). Secondly, I agree with the above poster in all of his points as well. Cute is definitely better than hot. You are just going to have to be patient and wait for one of us good guys to find you. Link to comment
meggiemoo72 Posted August 28, 2009 Author Share Posted August 28, 2009 Aww thank you so much....I never expected reactions like that! I'm a "little sister" or "friend" type....oh the times I've heard that!! Thank you again and it's ctually so refershing to hear that some guys don't necessarily don't go for incredibly sexy girls and all of that jazz... Link to comment
Knight of Hope Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 You just made me feel SO much better! Thank you for your lovely words. No problem. Anyway, WISH he'd get a move on wherever he is!!!! ha! England, Ireland, Scotland, France, America, Germany....WHEREVER he is and whoever he is, seriously he needs to hurry up!!!!!! Hey, you're not alone there! I've been thinking the same about my Mrs. Right quite a bit lately. I'm ready for a wonderful girl to make my life even better, and I'm ready to make her life the best it's ever been! I don't really care where she is, just that I somehow meet her and recognize her. You know the kind of days I mean.... a guy at work asked me if I was a lesbian today because I hadn't had a boyfriend, how he found out I have no idea and I' not ashamed of it, I just would raher people didn't know that's all. I felt pretty upset after that but battled on.... haha! Just had one of those days and felt the need to vent.... I do understand completely. I've had those days, too. On occasion, I'll let a close friend know I've never had a girlfriend. When they react with surprise (always happens that way), then my day tends to become one like you had today. I usually end up calling a different close friend and venting a bit. I saw this couple together today and they were UTTER cuteness and I felt like crying. I mean, it was LOVELY and such a heart warming sight but I felt so lonely.... So, umm... do we have a mind link or something? This happens to me all the time. lol I don't feel jealous of that specific couple exactly. It's more like I really want that special feeling called love in my life, but it just hasn't come my way quite yet. Link to comment
meggiemoo72 Posted August 28, 2009 Author Share Posted August 28, 2009 So, umm... do we have a mind link or something? This happens to me all the time. lol I don't feel jealous of that specific couple exactly. It's more like I really want that special feeling called love in my life, but it just hasn't come my way quite yet. DITTO DITTO DITTO! I don't feel jealous of people, I think it's lovely and something to be cherished and I feel so happy for them until I realise I have NO idea what it's like to feel what it feels like to happen to me (Ok that was hideous English!). It is quite amazing to find out that there ARE people who have the same worries, concerns, feelings and thoughts as you even if they are half way accross the world and have no real idea who you are! It helps so much I guess and I don't usually do this kind of thing but it DOES help and I don't feel sad for doing it as I guess, you always try to find people to UNDERSTAND and when you do, it's so reassuring ... Link to comment
em22 Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Yeah i know excatly what you are about, even though i am a guy.. It just hits me out of nowhere and got me thinking. I guess i have similar mind set, i often feel like i am really old-fashioned (although i am only 22) and sometimes i feel ashamed becouse of it. Girls that i meet are mostly about model type-handsome guys, fancy clothing etc., so it is mostly just me, my thoughts and fantasies. PS: You are really cute on the picture, obviousment Link to comment
meggiemoo72 Posted August 29, 2009 Author Share Posted August 29, 2009 Yeah i know excatly what you are about, even though i am a guy.. It just hits me out of nowhere and got me thinking. I guess i have similar mind set, i often feel like i am really old-fashioned (although i am only 22) and sometimes i feel ashamed becouse of it. Girls that i meet are mostly about model type-handsome guys, fancy clothing etc., so it is mostly just me, my thoughts and fantasies. PS: You are really cute on the picture, obviousment Oh thank you so much, I never expected such lovely comments- you're too kind As for feeling old fashioned. I kind of embrace it! Hell, I knit, wear vintage clothes, love cups of tea, period dramas and old movies and museums and big old houses and gardens etc. I LOVE all of those things and feel so happy surrounded by things like that but I'm also into everythign else tht people are into at my age....maybe except the drinking and clubbing. I LOVE live music, gigs and festivals and am massive on my music. I work in a book store so I'm pretty well read and cultured and LOVE movies etc. So, I wouldn't be ashamed if I was you! I LOVE people who admit their quirks and are proud of them. There's this guy at work who is soooooo COOL in the crazy sense of the word and you'd think he would be all conceited and arrogant but he's not...he's so down to earth andwat makes him endearing is that he embraces exactly who he is!! HE said to me today that he was looking forward to the new Gossip Girl season and the other day said he shed a few tears watching Breakfast at Tiffany's (one of my favourite films I let him borrow) ... it's not in a kind of way that would make him seem as if he was trying to appeal to girls etc, it's genuine! I guess it's better to embrace who you are and be proud. I KNOW I'll never change and if that meeans I'll stay alone, so be it. It's SO nice to know that people like YOU are out there too! It's so nice to know that others like these things and I'm not alone...wish we could all find eachother- haha! Girls go for all different kinds of people I guess and I KNOW it's the general concensus that most girls go for those kind of guys but I look for quirky people and I CAN'T be the only one!!!!! Link to comment
Knight of Hope Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 I guess it's better to embrace who you are and be proud. I KNOW I'll never change and if that meeans I'll stay alone, so be it. From what I've heard, that's the first step you need to take to find the right person. After all, if you don't believe you're lovable, then who else will? Currently working on that same first step myself... Link to comment
Brightest Dark Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 Hey Meggie, you do look cute and pretty - so don't worry so much. If you're interested in guys, ever tried an online dating site like plentyoffish? I'm sure you'd get loads of guys interested in you on there. Don't change - just stay yourself - because you sound way cooler than the ones who party all the time and get drunk. You'll find someone. Link to comment
dr_styles Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Well as you've read you could probably say I'm over thinking too about where I stand, but in terms of the social part it's a lot simpler on what I like or don't like. I pretty much hate nightclubs "with a vengeance" (ok not really the 2nd part, it just sounds cool and staying up/out late which I can't seem to get used to enjoying either, but similarly I think that the people you meet at these places are generally not my type. If you still have lots of friends who share these interests then you shouldn't really be worried about it. If the problem is you're doing these things with friends (or without) but you find yourself contained in the group not able to meet anyone new, then I understand that one a lot more. Hehe like I said to "non-mainstream" Knight, will you be my friend? And for what it's worth yes I think you are very attractive. You'd get me looking anyway with that lovely smile and very neat look. This is where ofcourse it ends because they pretty much never even look back as the first hurdle. On that note, if you are after the more nicer - generally shyer? - guys unfortunately you might need to be a little more forward? If people are calling you nice and cute in real life then you shouldn't be too worried in the Looks department. It's only a problem when you seem to get called good looking in the virtual world only but not in real life. Also since you're at the tail end of Uni try and do ... anything ... whilst you're still there. I definitely miss Uni and how you naturally meet people - without all those co-worker strings attached if you fancy someone. Annoyingly I was there for a while too with a long course. Surely she doesn't need to try online dating? She seems to have plenty of social/friendship outlets already, and the looks ofcourse. (Then again what would I know ...) Link to comment
shy2cool Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 If I saw you somewhere I'd approach you and start a conversation, and I'm so hopelessly shy! You look approachable and are the type of girl that I would be attracted to - cute and adorable; so I don't think that you will need to worry about anything! Ugh, hope this post doesn't come accross as creepy sounding. Link to comment
Brightest Dark Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Surely she doesn't need to try online dating? She seems to have plenty of social/friendship outlets already, and the looks ofcourse. (Then again what would I know ...) I'm not saying she needs to, but I think even more guys would spot her on there and like her. In real life often guys don't even tell you if they like you - whereas online people are way more likely to. If she is insecure or unsure about whether guys do or don't like her, then I'm sure a site like that would definitely give her a boost of confidence if nothing else. Plus there's nothing wrong with online dating, anyway. Link to comment
Knight of Hope Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Plus there's nothing wrong with online dating, anyway. Agreed. We (as shy people) can't easily win if we play by the rules of the dating game set by our more extraverted species-mates, so we have to look for other ways to woo members of the opposite sex. Online dating is just one of these ways! I seriously think that the number of couples meeting online will increase over the next few years. This number will increase, especially among shyer/quieter people who don't really thrive in the current dating game. And as this number increases, the stigma associated with online dating shrinks and shrinks and shrinks. P.S. Sorry if this was at all awkwardly-worded. I had an exhausting week this week (3 exams... they call this "First Year Dental Student Hell Week"), and I'm tired! lol Link to comment
LightbulbSun Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Meggie, you're the type of girl I would want to date. You're really pretty. I hope that doesn't come accross as creepy too, lol. I think a lot of guys would agree with me. Link to comment
dr_styles Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 haha yeah I was thinking as well "I hope this post (mine) doesn't read too creepy". Link to comment
.jpg.1626fbc48c04fd9021fd315819807524.thumb.jpg.882936eb5901fa05cf31c75617acde2e.jpg)
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.