I think I might be ready to date again...Should I stick to my promise?

[Stella Sleepwalks]

So me and the ex have been broken up for about 10 months now, after being on again off again for a year. He totally broke my heart and treated me like crap, and I decided that 2009 was going to be a man free year, because I needed to work on myself.

 

During my single time, I have learned to accept that not ALL guys are going to treat me like my ex did - (I have been out with a few low-lifes) - and that by not giving other men a chance, I am not giving myself a chance! So I actually think I'm ready to start dating again.

 

I haven't met anyone yet so I'm not in a position to date really, but I'm just wondering whether people think it would be worth me sticking it out until 1st January 2010, incase someone does ask me out? I have been asked out a few times this year but said no. I have a job interview next week for a fab job and am working hard to accomplish that goal. I have booked a couple of holidays for me and my mum to go on in September and December, so my life is busy.

 

Just a bit of feedback would make all the difference. Thanks

[hockeyboy]

Don't plan/schedule your life so much and just live it.

 

When the time is right and the guy is right...go with hit.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Your vow to be man free for 2009 was made at a time when you were starting your healing process. It is not written in stone. If you feel ready enough to date, have sorted through your issues and demons and have no more feelings for you ex then I don't see the point of sticking to a vow you made when you were in a different frame of mind. Vacations will always be happening, as will other things in life like job interviews etc. There will be no "perfect" time to start dating again so why not start now.

[Jd1983]

I think you already did a fantastic job on going this far without having someone in your life. It's perfectly ok to cut yourself some slack and see what's out there for you. At least you know you won't have any baggage. I say go for it!!! What have you got to lose?

[Stella Sleepwalks]

Don't plan/schedule your life so much and just live it.

 

When the time is right and the guy is right...go with hit.

 

 

I think the next time around I will definitely not get as swept up as I did last time. I won't rush into sleeping with, or saying I love you to a person until they say it first.

 

See, I find "dating" frustrating. It can make you feel worse, like why can't I just meet him already! Ha ha ha! But maybe I should just go on a couple to get back into the swing of things.

 

I've never been out with a guy I actually found physically attractive. Its always about how a man treats me and speaks. maybe I should be a bit more shallow next time around!

 

I know it sounds old fashioned but, I want to be courted and romanced before the sex comes into play. I honestly don't think a man who thinks the world of you would care if you made him wait until the 10th or even 20th date.

[Scotsman]

Good luck and I think only you will know when you feel ready, and yes if he thinks enough of you, he will wait for you.

 

I hope you find what you are looking for

 

 

[Stella Sleepwalks]

I think you already did a fantastic job on going this far without having someone in your life. It's perfectly ok to cut yourself some slack and see what's out there for you. At least you know you won't have any baggage. I say go for it!!! What have you got to lose?

 

Your vow to be man free for 2009 was made at a time when you were starting your healing process. It is not written in stone. If you feel ready enough to date, have sorted through your issues and demons and have no more feelings for you ex then I don't see the point of sticking to a vow you made when you were in a different frame of mind. Vacations will always be happening, as will other things in life like job interviews etc. There will be no "perfect" time to start dating again so why not start now.

 

Thanks girlies

 

I work in a very male dominant environment - so lots of uncles and big brothers looking after me I am always asked, why haven't you got a boyfriend?", "If I was single...", "If I was 20 years younger" Ha ha ha! They all want me to have a man in my life who treats me right, and yes they know about the ex and have nothing nice to say about him!

 

My friend said to me today, "You and your mum should go to NYC - start saving up and go!" Well, my ex was always going to take me, but....well you know the rest. I said to him that actually I would like to go with a partner rather than my mum, and that's sort f made me think about dating again. I'm only 27, I should be going on holiday with a wonderful man who is proud of me.

[Stella Sleepwalks]

Good luck and I think only you will know when you feel ready, and yes if he thinks enough of you, he will wait for you.

 

I hope you find what you are looking for

 

 

 

Yeah, I think a lot of men would wait if the girl asked them to. If they wouldn't, well move on, they only wanted you for one thing anyway! I rushed into it in the past and I think it did effect the relationship.

[ghost69]

Yeah, I think a lot of men would wait if the girl asked them to. If they wouldn't, well move on, they only wanted you for one thing anyway! I rushed into it in the past and I think it did effect the relationship.

 

why would i wait for a girl? obviously, i'm not what she wants at that point in time.

[Stella Sleepwalks]

why would i wait for a girl? obviously, i'm not what she wants at that point in time.

 

Not all men are as irresistible as you Ghost

[pumpkinmoon]

I think if you meet someone you like then you should go for it. You will never know what could have been if you dont give it a go

 

Good luck xx

[Stella Sleepwalks]

I think a spar has definitely got to be there first. That can take YEARS. Me and my ex definitely has chemistry in the beginning...I just wish is was that easy!