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me and my ex-boyfriend just got back together...but he won't invite me to this party.


lhc1575

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okay so there's a lot of back story to this...if you want to read it, you can look at my previous post (I think it's in my profile) but long story short, me and my ex got back together, we broke up a week ago and decided to continue dating because we still had feelings for each other, but I requested just to call it "dating exclusively" since I'm leaving in a few days to go to college.

 

there's an album release party coming up Thursday night (two nights away), one of the band members is friends with my boyfriend (we're technically just dating, but for convenience I'll call him that) so he invited my bf to go. and I guess I'm kinda confused as to why he hasn't invited me...I know we just got back together but it's one of the last nights I'm in town, so why wouldn't he want to spend some time with me? he doesn't have to include me in everything he does, but I feel like he would just want to do something fun since I'm leaving soon.

 

and it was, just as an added detail, his idea to get back together...I was the one who dumped him (that whole story is again in my last post).

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hey, thanks for your reply...and he was iffy about the details of what we are...he didn't really want to label it, and I was the one who just said that we could date exclusively...idk if that changes anything haha but I know what you're saying.

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"I was the one who dumped him"

 

"I was the one who wanted it to be called 'dating exclusivelly'"....

 

It sounds like a power struggle to me. You would like to think you are in control but really in this situation He is in control by not inviting you to the party.... just a thought.

 

when you are just dating you will not necessarilly want to include your date as much as if it was a bf or a gf... so in his mind that might be it, or it might be an attempt at feeling in control... I mean, being "dumped" gives a blow to a person, makes them feel vulnerable. why should he all of a sudden include you in everything? You keep giving him messages that you are not "that serious".

 

why don't you sit down with him and be totally open about how you feel and what you want. you need to redefine your relationship together, don't you? Unless it really isn't that serious, then you cannot expect to be included in everything and for him to tell you how he feels deep down.

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If you're not b/f-g/f and you're leaving in a few days and you were kinda iffy about the relationship in the first place, I can see where he might want to get out and have a night to himself or possibly meet new people (?) so he can have some new connections after you head off to school.

That's my guess.

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