divz21 Posted June 23, 2009 Share Posted June 23, 2009 Hey guys this is suchaaa random situation... but im trying ever so hard to get back with my broken half and its really getting there.. but then like a mutual friend we have both sort of made i feel is getting in the way... According to another mutual friend (very close friend to me) told me that the other girl had asked just him to come to her flat near her uni but then my guy asked his best mate to tag along and the mutual friend who told me all this.. however the mutual friend( very close to me) declined. and then there was my guy and his best guy mate going to her flat... When i confronted my guy like what exactly happened.. he said that she asked him first then asked the rest to come to the flat thus not alone.. What do i believe.. im so lost right now.. my mutual friend doesnt have any reason to lie.. Link to comment
NightLily Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 I think your post must be a bit confusing.. but also, why does it matter who invited whom? Am I missing something? Link to comment
divz21 Posted June 26, 2009 Author Share Posted June 26, 2009 It matters because i think the girl likes the guy im trying to get back with and my mutual girl mate dont trust her either.. Link to comment
NightLily Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Well, if you aren't dating him, then why can't she make a pass at said guy? Don't worry about her, just focus on what you want. If he wants to be with her over you, then it was a waste of time. There will be other guys. Link to comment
savignon Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Who invited who over is pretty trivial. If he wants to get back with you, another interested girl won't get in his way. Link to comment
divz21 Posted June 27, 2009 Author Share Posted June 27, 2009 yeah he wants to be with me and always tells me he wants to be with me.. but i just got a bad feeling this girl wants him.. Link to comment
divz21 Posted June 27, 2009 Author Share Posted June 27, 2009 he spends most of his time with friends and in that group shes always invited.. and im working 6 days a week so i hardly see him.. and today he invited me over to chill with him tonight ...but im feeling kind of ill last few days and i have lost my appetite..and like i dont know if i should go see him.. i have been very distant and hardly have contact with him so he misses me atleast... Link to comment
NightLily Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 Truth of the matter is, there may always be somebody that wants him. Look at his actions. If he is trying to be with you in a relationship than he isn't just trying to play you (MAYBE). If he is trying to pursue her, then he wasn't for you. If he is looking into other options and you are sure about it (or not) you should as well. You guys aren't in a relationship and this sounds like it is placing too much stress on you. Is he really worth all of this worry? Link to comment
divz21 Posted June 29, 2009 Author Share Posted June 29, 2009 i truly care about him.. he says he wants to be with me and stuff.. and doesn't want anyone else but me.. but i feel left out that he spends time with friends.. more than me.. and like i used to hang out with all of them till that girl came into the picture and now hardly go.. just dont want to feel left out.. Link to comment
NightLily Posted June 30, 2009 Share Posted June 30, 2009 Maybe it is about a little insecurity? If you are friends with a group of guys and are "the girl" in the group you get a certain degree of attention for being female. Then, when another comes along it can be a little bit of a competition as if they are taking your position. Because she is new, the guys will drool over her for a while and then get over it eventually. You should just go about your life as if she is just another person in the room. Hang out with them if you want to. Link to comment
divz21 Posted June 30, 2009 Author Share Posted June 30, 2009 I just dont know what i can do to make him want me more.. and actually ask me out suzy.. its like im trying to play hard to get.. but also be there for him...im not doing anything wrong.. but i dont know how to make him want me.. Link to comment
divz21 Posted June 30, 2009 Author Share Posted June 30, 2009 it could be insecurity.. ur message made me feel a bit better hehe.. well there are 2 girls in the group.. but the other one is my friend aswell.. but it seems like the new girl is apparently replacing the other girl..but who knows.. Link to comment
NightLily Posted June 30, 2009 Share Posted June 30, 2009 I have some issues with insecurity as well so I know the deal. The thing is, you CAN'T make him want you. You can try to get him to notice you but he already knows you. You could try to spiff yourself up a bit but that only really does so much. Just focus on being your best self. If he doesn't bite, it is his loss. He blew his chance. Link to comment
divz21 Posted July 1, 2009 Author Share Posted July 1, 2009 Thanks lovey.. his excuse is that he wants to settle in the r.s and when hes ready he will ask me out officially.. i dont know if i should spend more time with him.. and let it just happen or back off and let him have time off.. Link to comment
NightLily Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 If I were you, I would just back off and do your own thing. If he wants you, let him work for it a little bit. Don't just sit there like a bump on a log waiting around for the guy. Link to comment
divz21 Posted July 8, 2009 Author Share Posted July 8, 2009 Sorry for late reply suzy without even seeing your advice thats exactly what i have been doing and ye seems to be making a lil more effort.. but slowly and surely..im actually feeling a little better about the situation not thinking or talking much only when he starts i feel im ok.. which is the main thing Link to comment
NightLily Posted July 8, 2009 Share Posted July 8, 2009 Good on you. At the end of the day, all the men in the world aren't going to make us feel better. Link to comment
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