women are so difficult to understand...

[stargazer]

Well nothing new about women. Started dating this girl a few months back. Very casual - not even kissing but a great person to be with. She started it all. She asked me on the first date and then for about 10 - 15 times after that.

 

One funny thing however - if I ask her out, she says yes but then cancels the date at the last moment. Always. Pretends to want only friendship but kept calling me so often. We used to talk 3- 4 hours on the phone once or even twice a week.

 

But now she's completely withdrawn. There is no more that "chemistry" between us. She always seems has a lot of work. Why have things suddenly changed ? Did I do anything wrong ?

 

Must mention that she has had about 3-4 relationships before but it's just the first one for me.

 

Do I just forget her and go on. What do I do. Any help ???

[TearsofaDragon20]

See no one is this world will ever be able to understand a woman. men yeah we may know but we truly dont. if we did then we wouldnt be on here with problems right? well the best thing to do is to see where she thinks of you. if you see it as a friendship type base. then let it be that way. some guys will jump to a relationship because they though "hey that might be a girl that i fell in love with at first sight!" sure that a good thing but others will sit down and think "damn will she screw me over or will i have a girl who will take me off me feet?" sure may seem corney but hey we will think that. the thing to do now is sit back see if this may be a bad thing or talk to her and see her status on this. it never hurts to talk and figure things out. best of luck to you stargazer and let me know what you think. take care.

[bleeder]

Hi Stargazer,

 

Tell me about it!

 

Women seem to have this knack for cancelling appointments at the last minute. I can't seem to find any answers...maybe the gals here might give us a hand?

 

Anyway, try to be patient with her. Perhaps she is going through this "playing hard to get" stage. If she keeps doing it constantly, then tell her that it is not very nice of her to do that and RESPECT is part and parcel of a relationship.

 

Ending with the words of Ali....'float like a butterfly and sting like a bee'. Cheers!

[knightofmartin]

this sounds strangely like my situation, but mine had a bit of a more twist, she was bisexual. But at any rate, it sounds prtty much what happened with me but we didn't talk on the phone that much. Perhaps her excuse is genuine? I would suggest what the person before me said: if she continues donig it .. its rude and tell her that it isn't really respectful or something like that. Just keep trying, and try asking a lot more indirectly. and see what her responses are. that method can really tell you if she wants to do somethnig or not. It has worked for me a few times. good luck!

[stockcarclay]

lolol i have been threw this so many times two words "mind games"

if this is your first ..just learn all you can ..girls and mind games they go together get good at them ...only way u get what u want to to act like you dont have to have it ..sometimes ignore it ....i play mind games everyday ..

step one: make her a little jelos

step two less attention tords her

step three little time

step four be blunt but nice blunt and tell her how u feal and to quit playing mind games. you like her ..

[stockcarclay]

o yeah ...major part of it ...flirt ...flirt ..and compliments..still also play like your not way way interested ..a lil co cky ness and confidence ..mix all these things and play with them and if you dont get the right results change the balance of all these ..and also one more thing alot of times girls say no when they mean yes somtimes ..they play and mix and match all these things too ..thats why girls are so damn confusing ..

[naecha]

Girls like to keep you guys wondering! That's what makes it fun!

[corvidae]

Grrr...personal hate of mine: when women are awkward, difficult and make life (which is pretty damn hard anyway) harder, then smile and say "Oh yes, us women are terrible, but THAT'S what makes us so great." OK so let me spell it out for all and sundry NO IT DOESN'T. It is not cute, it is not fun, it does NOT make life interesting. Stop it.

[PrincessLinzay]

Lol. I think men and women are equal in the confusion area. Women are just as confused by you men as you are by us. Different thought processes make it hard to figure things out for both sexes.

[Jimbo10]

I think guys are a lot more willing to try with a girl. We just don't like getting rejected. I wish girls everywhere in the world would start asking for dates MORE. It's so hard for us, and i dont really believe that girls have the same trouble reading us, were way to obvious so much of the time.

[ShySoul]

Men and women shouldn't be difficult to understand. Everyone wants the same thing in the end, someone who understands, loves and appreciates them. Someone they can be friends with and enjoy being around. What makes things so difficult is the fact that people usually don't know what they want or are not ready to have it. Thus they pull away or play little mind games. Some people also have it stuck in their heads for some reason that they should be playing games, that this somehow makes them more appealing. Everything would be so much simpler if people were honest with each other and stopped all the childish games.