THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[anon12]

I wouldnt say its over but you have to make sure you dont repeat that again.

You got a good chance if you follow the NC rule.I think she still loves you from what i read in ur post.So now you know what to do.

If u ever want her to come back just give her the space she needs.

She will have enough time to see the new b/f isnt you and she will start to see his bad sides and issues.Also gives her time to miss you and analyse the situation.Just cant compete with the novelty at this moment.Soon she will see hes not mr perfect.Let her stew over her relationship.Dont worry,she wont forget you !

 

Thank you, i know a few people are givin you a hard time, but the advice youve given me has been great.

 

I think its going to be easier to stick to NC this time, i dont really feel like theres anything else i can say, The new guy doesnt compare to me on any level, which makes everything even more confusing, but i guess after the honeymoon period ends with them, thats going to come to my advantage

[bitebenot]

Thank you, i know a few people are givin you a hard time, but the advice youve given me has been great.

 

I think its going to be easier to stick to NC this time, i dont really feel like theres anything else i can say, The new guy doesnt compare to me on any level, which makes everything even more confusing, but i guess after the honeymoon period ends with them, thats going to come to my advantage

 

If you are better than him,then its very good for you.I guess your ex is a bit lost and very emotional.Also the new guy is a big talker and she bought it !During this time take care of yourself,its imperative ! For now its YOU YOU YOU ! Try to think she will never come back,it will be easyer on you.

Also look at other women,im sure you will find some of them very attractive !

You are allowed to have fun in anyway you want,she gave you the ok to do so ! Imagine if she saw you with another girl ? That would surely make her think deeply and painfully.Just another tought.

[klafeoj]

day 2.

Yesterday injured self on job... texted the gash to couple friends, including her sister ( we are in reality good friends). She called me that night (her sister not the ex) asking how i was. I told her i was fine. She told me my ex asked her to relay the message that if i wanted she would come and take care of me (the ex). Sigh very weird...

[1guygirl]

We are all humans,you will learn over and over again.You havent lost what you started..this time it will be a litle easyer.Thats why its so important to think about ourselves.We tend to give to much to others and receive very litle in return.The day that you will discover how important you are, you will start to forgive her and move on because you wont care about loving her anymore.Do you know how many women are looking for a good man ?

Life is like a school,we are here to learn and not repeating our pass mistakes.

 

anon...bites right!!! ...eventually nc will just be a way of life and actually you dont wanna break it...

 

dont beat yourself up, just like peeps said, delete her pics and then delete her from fakebook. you'll be ok and more

 

day 14 for me...cant believe its been two weeks...still sad but hey, i still love him, but i love me more. end of.

 

keep strong peeps xxx

[1guygirl]

day 2.

Yesterday injured self on job... texted the gash to couple friends, including her sister ( we are in reality good friends). She called me that night (her sister not the ex) asking how i was. I told her i was fine. She told me my ex asked her to relay the message that if i wanted she would come and take care of me (the ex). Sigh very weird...

 

*ahem* i fink thats breaking nc by proxy

 

no texting relatives or friends...in some way its reaching out to them...yup harsh but hey, gotta be said

 

any chance of this pic going up of the mighty gash?? ....or was it really just a lil scratch??? hehe

[anon12]

Day 2, i dont get this girl, she used her friends facebook account to comment on my status, about thinking about moving to go to uni.

 

My schoolmate, who works with her said he was thinking the same,

 

She says " your not allowed to leave because its illegal to leave me behind.

 

What??

[klafeoj]

*ahem* i fink thats breaking nc by proxy

 

no texting relatives or friends...in some way its reaching out to them...yup harsh but hey, gotta be said

 

any chance of this pic going up of the mighty gash?? ....or was it really just a lil scratch??? hehe

 

Eh guess im pseudo day two then... yea i know i need to ditch her family too (sucks) but they will be on the chopping block as well. Mighty Gash hardly... it's about an inch to inch and half on palm... just needed 4 stitches. But thats a pretty good injury for a chemist

But heres looking forward to day 3.

[bitebenot]

Day 2, i dont get this girl, she used her friends facebook account to comment on my status, about thinking about moving to go to uni.

 

My schoolmate, who works with her said he was thinking the same,

 

She says " your not allowed to leave because its illegal to leave me behind.

 

What??

 

Just ignore her ! Shes playing games with you.Shes expecting you to comment but you wont !

[anon12]

Just ignore her ! Shes playing games with you.Shes expecting you to comment but you wont !

 

I know shes playin alot of games, but dont understand why, she knows exactly where i stand, and didnt seem too bothered that i wasnt going to speak to her again

[1guygirl]

I know shes playin alot of games, but dont understand why, she knows exactly where i stand, and didnt seem too bothered that i wasnt going to speak to her again

 

shes trying to take back some power...its called ego

[1guygirl]

Eh guess im pseudo day two then... yea i know i need to ditch her family too (sucks) but they will be on the chopping block as well. Mighty Gash hardly... it's about an inch to inch and half on palm... just needed 4 stitches. But thats a pretty good injury for a chemist

But heres looking forward to day 3.

 

a chemist with 4 stitches....dont tell me...trying to open one of those bloomin sealed bottles hehehe!!!

[anon12]

shes trying to take back some power...its called ego

 

Why does she need power over me, when shes now with someone else.

 

More and more of her friends are starting to add me now, starting to get annoying

[klafeoj]

a chemist with 4 stitches....dont tell me...trying to open one of those bloomin sealed bottles hehehe!!!

 

Not quite that clumsy. Snapped a glass condenser in half slicing the hand in the process. lol just cause I'm smart doesn't mean i can't make stupid mistakes

[bitebenot]

I know shes playin alot of games, but dont understand why, she knows exactly where i stand, and didnt seem too bothered that i wasnt going to speak to her again

 

Its called MANIPULATION !!!!!!!!

[bitebenot]

*** The rebounder and the " x "

The rebounder goes fishing,puts a crumb at the end of the line.

The x takes the bait,he/she is reeled in.The rebounder looks at it and says

" whow, i got me a big fish " .The x is unhooked and thrown back to where he/she came from ! But in NC,the rebounder cant do it anymore ! The rebounder goes back fishing with a better bait..doesnt work !

The rebounder realises that crumbs dont work anymore.

The x got smarter with time and starting to have control over his/her life.

The rebounder is getting upset..the x is no longer available.Sadness sets in..loneliness.. and nostagia kicks in.The rebounder tries another bait...still doesnt work ! At this point they give up or they want reconciliation.

[anon12]

Its called MANIPULATION !!!!!!!!

 

Yea but i dont see what her goal is.

 

day 3. Feeling alright. Still dont feel a need to ever break nc this time.

[klafeoj]

Day 3... you know those 5 stages of grief... i started into anger. It kinda nice. One more step to acceptance. I thought back over the last couple months and realized... she fell out of love with me months ago... i then got very spiteful because she dragged it on for so long while i was in denial. I don't know if feelings for her rebound started before we broke up or if she just saw him as a friend until after the fact. But either way i have a sense of betrayal. Can't cry over split milk...

[syxx87]

Day 5, Round 2, 42 days since the breakup

 

5 days since I told her we cant talk or hangout as long as she is dating her boss. Felt a little better with each passing day. Its hurts though because each passing day that we dont talk shows that she is still with him and would prefer him over me. Each day gets a little better though.

 

For whatever reason though, this morning set me back some because when I got on facebook, she showed up on my news feed (I took her off my news feed when we broke up) and just seeing her irrelevant innocent status saying "Pink hurt for some reason and then it showed that she is now friends with her boss' sister. I tried to do everything to take her off my feed again but it wont let me and I refuse to delete her from my friends because that would just show her that I'm not over her and cant handle possibly seeing her even online. So I've decided I'm gonna take as much time as needed off from facebook. I just want to be over all of this.

[bitebenot]

Day 3... you know those 5 stages of grief... i started into anger. It kinda nice. One more step to acceptance. I thought back over the last couple months and realized... she fell out of love with me months ago... i then got very spiteful because she dragged it on for so long while i was in denial. I don't know if feelings for her rebound started before we broke up or if she just saw him as a friend until after the fact. But either way i have a sense of betrayal. Can't cry over split milk...

 

Im sure she was preparing herself ahead of time to leave you.

Its not rare..she was ready when she left.

Most would do that,that way its not so painful when they take off with another dude.Most relationships can be fixed,when they react that way it means that they were not interested anymore !

But it doesnt mean they wont regret their decision ! Sometimes, after a few months, they realize that they still love their ex and try to reach and reconcile.Most of the time the ex had enough time to heal and move on, and the rebounder is pushed away ! When someone falls out of love,its the best time to dump them before they do !

[bitebenot]

I would delete her from everything... what she thinks is not important.

You have to desappear totaly ! Make it impossible for her to find you !

You already lost her ! What would it change ?

Time to kick a$$ and seriously ! Ignore her in everyway possible !

Let her know she no longer exist for you..no pity at all !

What is important its YOU YOU YOU !!! She dont give a sh!t how you feel !

Ignore the slob just like i do with my ex.

We always have to ignore the dumpers,its the logical thing to do.To them we became toxic waste...its time to react to it by moving on !

[bitebenot]

Yea but i dont see what her goal is.

 

day 3. Feeling alright. Still dont feel a need to ever break nc this time.

 

Come on now !!! She keeps you as her safety net ! Thats her goal !

And also shes amusing herself by playing with your feelings !

You need to get rid of everything she has to reach you on your PC.

The only access she should have is your phone ! All you would need to do its take the messages,never answer ! Again,you have to desappear !

NOTHING else will do.She has to feel that you are no longer in her life !

Be smarter then her..dont give her one inch !

Make sure she cant find you anywhere,not even a picture.

Even remove your voice from your answering machine.

Be pissed at her and react the way you should to this ugly situation.

Maintain control at all cost ! That way she will feel that shes the one who was dumped ! Then sit down and enjoy the ride.

[klafeoj]

Im sure she was preparing herself ahead of time to leave you.

Its not rare..she was ready when she left.

Most would do that,that way its not so painful when they take off with another dude.Most relationships can be fixed,when they react that way it means that they were not interested anymore !

But it doesnt mean they wont regret their decision ! Sometimes, after a few months, they realize that they still love their ex and try to reach and reconcile.Most of the time the ex had enough time to heal and move on, and the rebounder is pushed away ! When someone falls out of love,its the best time to dump them before they do !

 

Yea I had to start the NC because she would keep calling acting like we were best of friends forgetting the fact she kind just swept our relationship under the rug in 3 days. I know it was a semi mutual break up (i consider her the dumper role since i want her back but idk) but come on. When we broke up she was thinking... idk we may work again... then after they started dating i got "i didn't know if i wanted to date you, but being with XXXX made me realize i didn't want to be with you anymore" anyway I do hope she figures that out. I figured i don't want to be the guy she loves but isn't in love with. Its all or nothing and i guess she'll have to get nothing. Just need to get over this fast so i can stop wasting time at work on ENA

[bitebenot]

I read a post once,a girl dumps her boyfriend,said she didnt love him anymore and she wil never never never take him back ! The 2 of them were in college.He tried everything to get her back,including friendship ! Nothing worked.So he told her he didnt want anymore contact with her.She didnt care.

She had found a new b/f 3 weeks after the break up (a rebound).Months went by and no news from her.Nine months later,hes going back to college and has a new g/f.He went to the gym ,lost 30 pounds and he looked good.

So he goes back to college,has his new g/f with him.

Now the ex sees him and his new g/f !!! Now she regrets everything.

Now shes was the one begging him to take her back ! He rejected her and with good reasons.The ex g/f got sick,couldnt fonction at work.

She tried everything but waisted her time.He never took her back !

Having a new g/f---b/f really shake the dumpers cage ! Now they know he/she

is gone for good and it hurts them bad ! So no frienship with the ex and never accept to be on the back burner ! AMEN

[klafeoj]

we were actually in a long distance relationship... she just graduated from college (im in graduate school) since she had nothing lined up she was going to spend time with me but that fell through. I think the LDR thing coupled with a rebound makes my case particularly crappy unless nostalgia kicks her ass. I guess its Day four officially now. Its weird how you can have moments of utter clarity where you think "wow i don't need her at all to be happy"...

[bitebenot]

we were actually in a long distance relationship... she just graduated from college (im in graduate school) since she had nothing lined up she was going to spend time with me but that fell through. I think the LDR thing coupled with a rebound makes my case particularly crappy unless nostalgia kicks her ass. I guess its Day four officially now. Its weird how you can have moments of utter clarity where you think "wow i don't need her at all to be happy"...

 

LDR arent so good.Better staying away from those type of relationships.

Hope you situation will improve.Go NC and move on the best you can.

Better not have any hopes in case she doesnt respond.Move on like its really over,its the best way for YOU.