mysteryman Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 I have been absent from this community, and hate to ask for help, but I really don't know who to ask... I am a high school senior. Recently a girl added me on myspace. I'll call her B. She was from a nearby town, I had never seen her before. B was absolutely astonishing though (trust me, I'm picky), and I was just kind of surprised. After a bit of a rough start, we ended up hanging out. In the meantime, I had heard rumors that she was.. "promiscuous" to put it kindly. Well we hung out (riding around) and it went rather well. She asked me if I had heard any rumors about her.. I told her the truth. She told me that people had spread rumors about her, because a lot of people like her. She stated she had sex with 2 people and done things with 3 people. And one thing led to another and we began kissing.. And after some reluctance I touched her down there.. She hadn't shaved there.. She said she had never expected it to go that far. And she was rather tight. So the point I am trying to get at is, I do not know who to trust. I have had several people state stuff, but it's never first hand accounts. The fact that she wasn't shaven and tight also seems to help point to her being honest. She is really gorgeous and a sweet girl, and I think I'm developing a crush on her, but I am afraid to get in a relationship with a bad girl. I just don't know really what to do. I have a good reputation also. Any tips or suggestions of what to look for? And I am aware that we got kind of far on the first date isn't helping the cause of her being good. Thanks for any help. Link to comment
KISSKISS Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 i remember you from a while ago. in my experience, ususally people don't just make up stuff. i mean yeah to a point they do, but like in high school most of the "rumors" people spread ended up almost always being true. just be careful and think wisely. Link to comment
Brittney2008 Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 Would you no longer be interested in her if she was what people said? I dont think the past matters that much as long as if you two are together she is faithful. Link to comment
KISSKISS Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 ^^^ she has a good point too. Link to comment
waveseer Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 I'm not sure I understand. It's important to you that she's a good girl so you can stick your hand down her pants on the first date? What critical piece of information am I missing? Link to comment
homeagain Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 I'm not sure I understand. It's important to you that she's a good girl so you can stick your hand down her pants on the first date? What critical piece of information am I missing? lol. i had the same reaction, but i worried that it meant things had changed too much since i was in high school for me to understand this whole thread. if you like this girl, then let your interaction with her speak for itself. don't worry about what others say about B. if you like her, that should be enough. Link to comment
mysteryman Posted January 30, 2009 Author Share Posted January 30, 2009 A lot of it is I am just afraid she is lying. Anytime I've gotten involved with liars it has ended badly. And I don't exactly mean good, I just mean I would prefer to have a girl that isn't awful. If she is what they claim, then I dont know.. Because she is the first girl that I've been really attracted to in quite a while. Anyhow, I am just curious if anyone has any tips on how to discover.. Thanks for the assistance btw. Link to comment
mysteryman Posted January 30, 2009 Author Share Posted January 30, 2009 And the good thing being morally good.. Like the hand there doesn't help prove that she is morally good, like not a "bad girl." Hopefully that makes more sense? Link to comment
mysteryman Posted January 30, 2009 Author Share Posted January 30, 2009 I must apologize, I am paying the price of trying to explain while multitasking. I dropped the ball again on explaining the good thing. The hand there tends to point that because she let a person do it that fast, that she may be a bad girl (like the rumors). That's all I am stating. So if that doesn't make sense then I give up lol. Sorry for any and all confusion I have caused. Link to comment
waveseer Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 I must apologize, I am paying the price of trying to explain while multitasking. I dropped the ball again on explaining the good thing. The hand there tends to point that because she let a person do it that fast, that she may be a bad girl (like the rumors). That's all I am stating. So if that doesn't make sense then I give up lol. Sorry for any and all confusion I have caused. I disagree completely unless she grabbed your hand and shoved it down her pants. Do you want a girl that won't let you put your hand down her pants? If so, then find another girl and let this poor girl alone. Link to comment
purpleduckie Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 there's a hypocrisy here.. youre the kind of boy who put his hand down a girls pant on the first date... if she's the kind of girl who let a guy put his hand down her pants... are you bad? but i kind of do get it... guys used to call me um, promiscuous too even though i didn't have sex until i was 17 and was actually planning on saving it for marriage (hah... long story) but it was mostly because i was stupidly naive and flirted when i shouldn't have. went on dates with guys without realizing they were dates... then guys got mad and did that to me. she might or might not be a liar... i mean, rumours are just rumours.. i dont think they are any indication of truth.. especially in highschool. my bestfriend was rumoured to be a crack um promiscious crack addict. haha but she was the furthest from one. i was known as the crazy promiscuous one.. i totally wasnt! highschool was annoying in that aspect. Link to comment
Rabican Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 Dude even if she has slept with a few people that doesnt make her a bad girl, and doesnt make her a cheater. Just have a rational talk with her (at some point, not on the second date) about where you two are headed. does she want a steady, commited relationship, or is she just looking for a few dates and someone to hook up with etc. Link to comment
denise_14 Posted January 30, 2009 Share Posted January 30, 2009 a lot of good points raised in here ^_^ just curious, would you have preferred that she resisted when you put your hand down her pants? does that make her a good girl? i think that the primary issue here is about your reputation. well, i understand though, i mean i admire guys that look for girls good enough they can bring home and introduce to their moms... i agree with rabican.talk to her, but more importantly, figure out for yourself first what you're really after too. i mean, are you really interested in her? any emotional attachments yet? coz if you truly like someone, i think the person's past shouldn't matter that much as long as s/he's changed. Link to comment
x235 Posted January 31, 2009 Share Posted January 31, 2009 I'm not sure I understand. It's important to you that she's a good girl so you can stick your hand down her pants on the first date? What critical piece of information am I missing? LOL... my thoughts exactly... Link to comment
x235 Posted January 31, 2009 Share Posted January 31, 2009 ”And after some reluctance I touched her down there.. She hadn't shaved there.. She said she had never expected it to go that far. And she was rather tight.“ It doesn't seem that you were all that reluctant... unless she forced you to do this of course? ”The fact that she wasn't shaven and tight also seems to help point to her being honest.“ I'm not sure why you think this would imply that she was being honest, shaving pubic hair has nothing to do with sexual promiscuity and being ”tight“ is not necessarily a sign of lack of sexual experience or of not being promiscuous. ”She is really gorgeous and a sweet girl, and I think I'm developing a crush on her, but I am afraid to get in a relationship with a bad girl. I just don't know really what to do. I have a good reputation also. Any tips or suggestions of what to look for? And I am aware that we got kind of far on the first date isn't helping the cause of her being good.“ I think you should try to lose the double standard. The fact that you ”got kind of far on the first date“ isn't helping the cause of your being ”good“ either if that's how you define being good. I agree with Ready to Heal. If you want someone who won't fool around with you on the first date or for a certain period of time, then stop seeing her and find someone who fits your standards(standards which you apparently don't hold yourself to). You may look back on this years from now and say... what was I thinking? She may be a wonderful person whether she's a ”good“ girl or a ”bad“ girl. Link to comment
mentee Posted February 1, 2009 Share Posted February 1, 2009 and you are such a "good boy" as to put your hands down a girl's pants and make a big deal about her being unshaven and "tight"? i'm a little appalled .. the hypocrisy. Link to comment
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