I do love him but how do I know if am still ' in love'

[Carrie_03]

Hi need advice, have been going out with my long term partner for 41/2 years, at first we couldnt get enough of each other (you know the usual story) but now it feels like we are a boring married couple, I have had other guys ask me out but I have always!! been faithful, as I know if I didnt have him or if I couldnt be with him then I would miss him like crazy.

 

We tell each other that we love one another all the time and I do try to spice up our sex life to make it like it used to be, and most of the time our sex life is great.

 

On the other hand I think secretly that he may be getting a bit bored with me as he as just started working in the company office that he used to work off site for, and I knew there would be more women there than he was used to working with, and there are a couple of girls he talks about now and again at first it didnt seem to bother me but the more he keeps talking about them the more worried I am getting!!

As he is a great looking guy and very friendly (that is probably why I fell in love with him in the first place)

I am worried that if he gets advances from these girls then he will be very tempted and no longer want to be with me?

 

My family and friends also keep asking when we are getting engaged, he hasnt mentioned it although I would like to spend the rest of my life with him, in the distant future. Also I am a very romantic person but he isnt so and knows it.

 

Should I stop myself from having any heart ache, and leave or should I trust him and stand by him no matter what?

[jessr06]

its normal to feel that way, and 4 1/2 years is a long time. i usto feel that way with my boyfriend. i even told him that i wasnt feeling the same... and he said... that he wasnt either... but than a huge thing happened and we realized that we really love eachother and we were made for eachother. you may not like the things hes doing, but he has to realizes sooner or later whats best for him, and when he does, you guys will be fine in no time... dont let it get to you, if you need to talk to me instant message me... id be glad to give you some tips

[elan-the-moose]

while i haven't been with my ex-GF for that much time, we still have been together 3 years, with big ups and BIG downs...

we are actually in a big down right now, i.e. she is my ex...

I broke up with her half a year ago because i did not know if i was with her by habit or if i really loved her... i felt i didn't need her anymore...

well, that was mean on my part, because she had given so much for our relationship... anyway, i came back

yes, after all i did, after all i felt, i came back.

after 4 months, because she was mad at me, but i came back.

now we just broke up again because she can't forgive me for what i did to her... right now.

i know that if 2 people have sincere feelings, and are really meant to be together, no matter what, if you let time do its job, you are bound to come back together.

I have decided not to beg her anymore, not to plead for us because it will make her even more distant. I asked her to give me a phone call when she is ready to talk to me...

i hope that everything is going to be fine for you

[SwingFox]

Hi Carrie,

 

In your place I would start to talk to him in a more serious way. May be it would be a good idea to share your concerns with him and let him know what's in your head. I think that if you don't, you will find yourself in guessing games and speculations. There might be NO reason at all to feel what you feel. He can help you with that....

 

Good luck!!!

 

~ SwingFox ~