need help and advice - bf has obsessive friend

[water_baby]

hello

 

i need some help.

my bfs friend appears to be ...how can i put this ..obessed with him. i wouldnt mind too much but as a result he hates me and is very rude.

 

i havent really said much to my bf about it because they have been friends for a long time.

 

i have let so many things slide but this weekend he called me a and was getting really angry with me. i know it is not that relevent but he is a heavy drug user and a all round dodgy character. when i spoke to him he told me a few things that rang alarm bells...the following

 

- "i used to love pete doherty until i met your bf"

- "i idolise him"

- "i love him more than my gf"

 

this coupled with him starring at him constantly, getting very jealous of me being with him. i dont really know how to handle him.

 

my bf is aware that he seems quite needy and jealous of him but he doesnt know to what extent.

 

how should i handle this

[Truth317]

Your bf needs to sit down and have a talk with him about all of this.

[DN]

Why did he call you that name - what happened?

[Iceman26]

Agreed. I think if you want to have a good relationship you must be open and honest with your boyfriend and tell him what his friend has said to you. This guy sounds like he needs some help.

[water_baby]

he called me a name because i said i was going to go sit with my bf now because i had left him on his own for awhile. he made a comment about how i didnt suit something (something random) so i walked away from him. he is just very

argumentative for me to even have a conversation with me.

 

i dont want to offend my bf or suggest that this guy fancies him but thats how he acts. he has a gf but its just hard to explain. my bf is in a band and when he last performed i was there and thsi guy said "dont get a big head, he can get any girl he wants"...out of the blue

 

i fear that if i say something they will stop being friends...

[DN]

I think you should just inform your boyfriend what has been happening and let him decide what to do - don't ask him to do anything just see what he decides.

[water_baby]

yeah, you are all right.

i just dont want to be that girl ...you know

the one that comes between two best friends.

[JadedStar]

Oh wow...those things you stated that he said ARE creepy.

 

I don't blame you for being shaken up. Yes, talk to your b/f. If he refuses to do anything aobut it or to see what is in front of him then make your decisions about the future of this relationship accordingly.

[Shyguy24]

Talk to your Bf,i am guessing that he will be the best person to respon to his friend.

[water_baby]

thankyou so much everybody.

sometimes i sit and think am i being silly. am i being mean to him and wondering why i feel so uncomfortable.

i will say something to my bf..hopefully i wont be writting in the "breaking up" section of this forum.

many thanks

[Iceman26]

yeah, you are all right.

i just dont want to be that girl ...you know

the one that comes between two best friends.

 

Well, there is a difference between coming between two friends and his friend being outright hostile and nasty to you. If he's a good boyfriend he will put his friend in his place and tell him the way he is acting is uncalled for.