Just broke up...

[rgm1266]

After giving it serious consideration, I broke up with my g/f last night. I've had several post here that named the issues that we were having during our relationship. She wasn't working and wanted me to pay her bills, ex lovers/ ex b/f's calling, and etc. I've tried and tried to explain to her about how I feel about things and she says I'm making a big deal about it.

 

The last several weeks I have been giving her money for her bills, trying to help her get her singing gig together, and etc. It was really taking a toll on me. Last weekend, we went to the mall and she bought about $200 worth of clothes. GRanted she charged some, but she spent $100 in cash. I'm thinking how in the heck could she put her lips together to ask me to help her with her bills. Then the other day she asked me to pay her rent ($900) and then with her bills (credit cards) next week ($450). I was so tired emotionally from the stress of worrying about my bills and hers that it was starting to take a toll on me and my job. My job comes first!!!

 

Yesterday we were sitting around the house, she got another phone call from her ex (lover/buddy) and she didn't answer the phone. She told me who it was and I asked why is her calling. She said I've told him not to call and I said you need to handle that or I will. The next thing she said was that I called him last week to tell him about my mom and we talked for a minute. Then next thing I'm thinking is you are calling him but are telling me that you told him not to call you? Do I look like I just fell off a truck? I don't have a problem with her having male friends and them calling every so often. But when they calling the house and then you tell me that you told them not to call, which story am I suppose to believe!!

 

So everything was cool after that, then we had a good rest of the day. So when we are just resting, we start talking about what we expect from eachother and I told her about the bills, money, and etc. She didn't agree with me on anything I said and said I was making a big deal. I asked her, true friends will understand and respect our relationship, engagement, and marriage. But the problem is that do you respect it? I asked her, which one is more important, marriage or your 2 ex b/fs? She didn't say anything!!! When she didn't say marriage, she didn't have to say anything else. She made her choice.

 

This relationship has been coming to a end for a while. I guess I was just trying to hold onto something that just wasn't meant to be. Now comes the difficult part of moving on. I make this vow to my friends on ENA, that I will do the NC rule.

 

I want to thank all the people and friends I have made here for their advice, some I agreed with and some I didn't but all the comments were genuine and sincere.

 

Thanks

[orangesoda]

Yikes, you made the right call. Jesus, you were her BF, not her sugar daddy. That's ridiculous that she's asking you to spend that kind of money. And on top of that, throwing in more drama with her ex's...?

 

No thanks.

 

It'll be tough at first but you'll be so much better off in the near future.

[homeagain]

You sound so kind to have tried to be understanding about her situation, but you are right: you have to draw boundries and live within them. You are her boyfriend, not her parent, and you do not owe her the financial support she is extorting from you. I'm sure we all wish we had a sugar daddy to take care of all of our bills, but that isn't fair or realistic. You have been more than tolerant here. You have been kinder than most of the world in this situation. Put yourself and your job first. You deserve someone who sees you for you and not as a blank check. You are so much more than that!

[doityourself]

i aint saying she a gold digger, but she aint messin with no broke

 

 

sorry, love that song

 

looks like ur being used, go find u a woman that will appreciate u

[confused_255]

I was somewhat in the same situation, id pay for evreything, she didnt work just partied and spent my money, she would do small things to aggrivate me and do stupid things that would make me really upset and then id confront her and she said i was making a big deal about it or she didnt do anything wrong and doesn't know why im upset at her... its tough especially when you love them and they try to take you for everything, emotionally physically financially.

 

go NC its been 13 days for me and i am feeling better already !