Do you think he'll come back?? Please advise

[jayne]

Thank you for reading my post!

 

My ex and I are both professionals in our late 20's.

 

Dated Doug for 5 months...he was my best friend and we got along very well, however he never told me how he felt about me. Someone else asked me out on a date so I said, "Doug, someone has asked me out. I really don't know them so I don't know if I want to go. If you don't have strong feelings for me I owe it to myself to start dating other people, if you do have strong feelings for me, you need to let me know."

 

He said he did not know how he felt about me and I starting dating other people. About a month ago, I started dating a really great guy and told Doug we should just be friends. We'll long story made short....we maintained being best friends, but lately we started sleeping together again.

 

After about 3 weeks of us sleeping together, I told him we could not be friends anymore as I want to move on and it breaks my heart everytime we end up in bed. He asked "Is this really what you want?" I said I wanted to be with someone who loves me, and not just have a casual sexual relationship. He said, "Well, I never thought it would come to this."

 

My question: We see each other about 2 times a week at different places in our city. Do you think that he will realize what he had, start missing me, and call me. Or, should I completely write this relationship off and give this other nice guy that I am dating a chance?

 

thank you thank you thank you for responding..I really need help!

[take_the_reins]

hey jayne,

i think you should just give the new guy a chance and just have a fresh start with as much time away from this other guy as you can ... he's had his chance to be with you .. and just messed you around .. unless you just want to be someones casual sex partner ... then i go for the safer option with the nice guy !

Hope everything works out for you

Good luck !

Mrsmalakian x

[neallo82288]

Here's one thing you never stated you feelings for Doug. You see if you have strong feelings for him then this "nice guy" just won't work out. Doug seems not to be interested in a relationship and you have accepted that, but this seeing him 2 or 3 times a week is not going to help yuo move on. Stop all contact with Doug and continue a casual, sexless relationship with "nice guy". Until you are ready and "nice guy" will understand. You have feelings for Doug and they must be addressed before you can move on to another relationship. But, being in a casual relationship is okay as long as the other person understands where you are and what is going on so he doesn't end up posting in here about how you hurt him.

[lunatic]

Jayne,

 

Do your self a favor. Take some time to think about what you want because it is you that has to deal with the repercussions of your decisions. Think about who makes you more happy and roll with it.

If it is Doug, then tell him that you will not sleep with him anymore without a commitment. If he wont commit then you might have to end the friendship. I would inform him about that also. I know that guys are not that observant when women speak about feelings and such. Let him know where he stands and let the ball roll from there.

 

Good luck,

Hubman