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In Love With A Cheating Sociopath – My Story


PrettyTallGirl

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  • 3 years later...

Pretty Tall Girl....as I read your story I swear I felt myself falling into the words printed before me as the story you've described is the story I've heard from my "spath" about a former lover of his. They are all so similar that it seems as though we've all been with the same man. I met him in 2008 and spent money on things because he "just lost his job". He lost many jobs which is a symptom of sociopathy. I hope you're healing well. I've since started my own page to help others who've been taken in by spaths. Good Luck to you.

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  • 3 weeks later...

That's too bad she hasn't come back to the thread, so we could hear how she is doing.. But since she hasn't, must be doing great

 

I myself went through a similar relationship 2006-2008 and then another one in 2009-early 2011 (2nd was more a narcissistic cheater/liar) with similar antisocial attributes and boy let me tell you the 1st one smartened me up so fast that I got out much faster and easier before the 2nd one could pull ANY of that crap on me. The 1st one drove me to being on anti-depressants, damaged adrenal glands due to constant stress and going down to 128 lbs as a 5'11 woman. It was the wakeup call that the relationship was literally killing me.

I have done a lot of counseling and reading on the dynamic of these types of relationships and I can't speak for everyone, but I know I was a victim of this type of relationship because I have a huge heart and used to love too much. These guys know exactly the type of woman to go for and it is always the loving/trusting/kind woman. I had pretty strict boundaries in these relationships that I managed to keep, but looking back you still feel a bit of shame that you allowed ANY type of abuse to even occur. For me I lived with both of them in their houses, so that dependence made it difficult to leave right away, but I did before any physical abuse occurred.

 

They damage your ability to trust almost completely after going through this. That is what I still work on to this day, but at the same time do they ever make you STRONG. The best lesson I was ever able to learn from these situations was to be ALONE for awhile after and heal. Independence gives you strength and you learn to take care of your own emotional needs, get rid of those PTSD after effects and get those boundaries back on track because the moment someone crosses them even a little you will launch them so fast It is so liberating that all my close girlfriend's now come to ME for advice because I am the strong one.

I hope this girl is doing well and has found that same strength, my heart truly goes out to her.

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