Confused

[spidan68]

I am 39 and the woman I have been seeing is 41.We started dating in September and she was totally into me constant calls,txts,and e-mails.We would usually see each other on Monday and Tuesday nights,but do to work I started to cancel seeing her once in awhile.Needless to say she was feeling a little lonely.In March she met this man that had a horse and he gave it to her with the agreement that she would help him clean stalls and stuff that the horses were kept at.This man does not own his own ranch but does shoeing and cleaning and such for the owner of the ranch that his and my girlfriends horses are kept at.I should point out that my girlfriends horse was more than he wanted to take care of.Around the time she met this man we had a fight and since then she has not let me stay over.They have grown a friendship that I am very jealous of. He lets her drive his jeep seems to come and go at her house,she has even gone and gotten him when he is drunk and the last time she did that she had to rush him to the hospital cause he broke his hand fighting.I have asked her over and over again if there is something going on with them.She says there isnt and still tells me she loves me and wants a relationship.She doesnt e-mail me like she did but still calls everyday.She tells me he is her best friend.She has been to my house several times and slept with me but does not stay the night.Anyway this is driving me nuts and I know the constant questions I ask about him is starting to make her mad but I cant help it.I know ignoring her the way I did when I was at work wasnt good and she has ill feelings about that but I have told her that I would make a lot more time for her.I do love her but am unsure if I should just leave her alone or not and see what happens.

[kevinm]

It sounds to me like she is using you for sex, a booty call, or whatever you want to call it. At the end of the day, you spend your free time with someone you like. And who is she spending more time with? Sorry.

 

-Kevin

[Supa_gurl]

I am not sure what to make of this? Have you told her any of your feelings at all? Maybe if you are open and honest about your jealousy and make sure she completely understands your feelings, she may either come out and tell you something you do not want to hear or reassure you in no uncertain terms that you are her love.

[Mutley]

rush him to the hospital cause he broke his hand fighting.

 

HA HA.

 

That's good, the next time he'll break it on her face. Jeez.

 

Anyway, my man, I'd just back off and see what happens. You are not wrong to have misgivings about this situation.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

If she is hanging around with this man and letting him stay at her house, while not letting you do the same, I think she is not telling the truth about what is going on.

 

I suspect she is dating him, but keeping you on tap in case she decides she doesn't like him as much as you. Or maybe she enjoys dating two people at once.

 

Regardless, i'd insist on visiting and staying at her house half the time, and if she refuses, break it off with her and tell her it is obvious she is seeing someone else and not being truthful about it.

[IMAbadman]

You have to wonder who actually is getting seconds in this situation?

[annie24]

If she is hanging around with this man and letting him stay at her house, while not letting you do the same, I think she is not telling the truth about what is going on.

 

I suspect she is dating him, but keeping you on tap in case she decides she doesn't like him as much as you. Or maybe she enjoys dating two people at once.

 

Regardless, i'd insist on visiting and staying at her house half the time, and if she refuses, break it off with her and tell her it is obvious she is seeing someone else and not being truthful about it.

 

yes, i agree. have you actually met this guy? that might be another thing to suggest, a meeting for dinner or something, if she insists that things are innocent, then there should be no problems with the 3 of you (or the 4 of you if he brings a date) coming for dinner.