The End of the Languid Period

[I_KicKed_keNNedy]

The circumstances may vary, but ultimately the event is the same: You are looking back on your immediate past and the present situation, it makes you fear for the future.

 

Yes, the things that make you hang your head (unrequited love, dire financial straits, laziness/procrastination, failure, drug addiction, personal embarrassment, etc) depress you, and they remind you of your weakness as a human being. But don't forget them. Sweeping things under the rug will put problems out of sight, but the rug becomes uneven and liable to catch you unawares and trip you up later.

 

Look at where you've failed. A well analyzed path to destruction will soon become your road map to success. How?

 

Well, here are some examples:

In interviews, Michael Jordan still relates a vivid recollection of being denied a spot on the varsity roster when he was a sophomore. Look at advances in technology and science. Would they have been made if each of the innovators said "Aw hell, I've tried like a hundred different things... this light bulb crap just isn't gonna happen," and went to the pub to lament their lot in life? Although the popular musician's name escapes me, I recall a wonderful quote from an interview: "I'd spend hours at night playing with s----y riffs until something clicked. That would be the riff that worked. That's where I'd stop. But I needed the other ones too. If I hadn't been playing crap for hours, I never would've loved that riff. And if I started with that riff, I would have gotten bored and probably messed with it."

 

Ah, Success: the last resort of the failure.

 

Muscle needs to be torn down for it to get stronger. Metal needs to be melted if its going to fuse to other metal. Our immune system builds up its defenses by being pestered by infections from time to time. This languid and depressing period you've found yourself in is what's going to make you tirelessly motivated to enjoy your life. Think about it, we only know how strong something is by learning what it can withstand.

 

So, now what? You've just listened to John Parr's Man in Motion, like a thousand times, and you're pumped up and ready to take on the world. Well that's the first step on a journey of a million paces.

 

First things first: set at least one goal. It doesn't have to be a lifetime goal, just something to give you a taste of achieving a goal of some sort. At this stage we often make the foolish mistake of shooting for the stars when we can barely get off the couch. Larry Bird may have wanted to be on the high school team, he may have wanted to play college ball, and he may have wanted to be in the NBA, but initially, his goal was to shoot 200 free throws before school every day. That's it. Free throws. He didn't call up college scouts or try to sneak into the Celtics locker room. Nope, everyday, in French Lick, Indiana, he tossed a ball at a hoop.

 

So take the first step, make up a goal and achieve it. Goal setting will become a drug addiction in a way, you'll build a tolerance and as the goals and the achievements get bigger and bigger, so do you.

 

For example, today, make the goal of walking a half an hour everyday for a week. Next week make a new goal. You may decide to take on the goal of jogging 1 mile each day. After a few years (more or less), you need a half marathon just to feed that goal achievement addiction. You didn't start with the intention of being a marathon runner or a running enthusiast. No, you just wanted to get your butt off the couch and away from the internets for a few minutes each day. But once again, start small. Don't start with the goal of being a marathon runner because I promise you: in one month you'll get shin splints.

 

The metaphor isn't accidental. Exercise is important, but don't let it be an end in and of itself. Like food, oxygen, and any other staple in life, the amount of exercise one needs varies and fluxuates throughout life. One thing can be certain though: You need some sort of exercise.

 

TRY THIS: If you have been feeling really down and out for a while, just stand up, walk around your home/office for five minutes and stretch your arms. That's it. Huh? Feel a little better? That's what I figured. No, you don't feel ecstatic, but you don't feel as suicidal anymore do you? Now imagine what would happen if you just did that little bit regularly. Thatta boy!

 

Nutrition/Food: A lot of people out there will wax idiotic about the perfect diet and why your diet sucks. Well, trust me, there's only one consensus on the topic: avoid excess. Sugar is bad in excess. Fats are bad in excess. Carbohydrates are bad in excess. Caffeine and Alcohol are bad in excess. If you want to feel better, just tone down your diet a little and work from there. Don't eliminate things from your diet, or fast, or go vegan, or anything like that because that's only going to cause you to crash. Practice moderation for a little while and then work from there. Remember, we're starting with baby steps. Carl Lewis didn't pop out of his mom and sprint to the bassinet. In fact, I bet he was crawling for a while.

 

Also, get some variety in your diet. Think about all of the great bands and music you've been exposed to by just trying something different every once in a while. Go to the supermarket, buy your eggs, milk, and bread, then wander for a while like you're browsing in a department store. "Hmm... never had hummus before. I'm going to try that on my chips instead of cheese. Gee, I kinda liked that." Think about it this way: You probably have a wide variety of songs on your iPod to feed your head, but how well off are you if you only have the same five things in your kitchen cupboard?

 

Learning new things from old friends:

The people in your life are going to be important, but don't make the mistake of calling up every one you know and saying "I'm making great strides and getting my life in order." Let you be the judge of that. Instead, look to those people as your way of getting out of your head. Call up a friend you haven't talked to in a while and find out everything you can about them. Visit family and see what's going on in their life. Talk to a co-worker about something that's been going on in the office. Avoid mentioning yourself or telling them what you think; your just saying things you already know, and you need this time to step away from your compulsive and redundant thoughts. When they ask about you, be positively vague. Say simple things like "I'm hangin' in there," or "Oh, I'm doin' alright... Tryin' to stay busy," and return the conversation to them. You are in a very peculiar state and any reflection on it might revert yourself to your sedentary behavior. Take a genuine interest in other people and you will be surprised how much wonderful emotion and insight is out there in the world outside your head.

 

Lastly, once again, start slow. You may feel like you're way behind and you have a thousand things you have to do. Well, just do one. Right now. That's it. After that, do another. If, in three hours you've only done two things and you still have 998 things to go, that's fine. It's still 2 more than you were probably going to do any way.

 

Have fun and good luck!

[dragon111]

brilliant and insightful, thanks for taking the time I_KicKed_keNNedy, your view on goals is very impressive and a good way to go about life, your last section on learning new things from old friends is the cream on the coffee, i think that's what i've been missing, oh, and yeah, the walk about and stretching thing is a big life saver for me too lol, really does make me feel better doing that