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Hello Everyone.

 

I have seen posted many times people asking advice on long-distance relationships and Cyber dating. and usually my advice is the same when asked "can it work out?"

 

I will say , that yes, the internet is an excellent tool for "finding" someone and its pretty good as a tool, for getting to know that person, using the internet and phone, you get to know a person from the inside out.

 

But I have also cautioned that, the net or phone, is not a good way to "maintain" a relationship, its just a communication device thats all. you must make contact and have experiences with this person in the "real world".

 

So I am following my own advice,, This tool called the Interenet has brought me in contact with a person that I believe to be a wonderful person, and I will be leaving in about 1 hour, on a 12 hour trip to be with her. we have been chatting and talking for about a month now, and we cant wait to see and be with each other.

 

I am not saying that an Internet gaurantees anything, it may or may not work out for us, I hope it will, but I have seen people go years chatting with someone without meeting them in person and when they do they dont get a long. just last night I heard from a guy, that cyber dated 2 years with a woman, gave up his job, and sold his stuff to be with this girl, when he arrives, he is picked up by her ex boyfriend at the airport. (this story is from outside this forum) and it went down hill from there.

 

The point is, if you do find someone through the net, and feel they may be the one, find out! go to them, be with them, kiss them and hold them in your arms for real. dont wait 4 months or 2 years. Life is short.

 

I am not the type to kiss and tell, so, I will not update on this other than, it went ok or not.

 

I will be out of town until Monday so I will miss the forum until then.

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Woohoo, Gilgamesh! You go, boy! *applauds* And WHY do I feel so strongly about this? Because I was in the same position. I traveled 12 hours myself (should have been an 8-hour trip but I got WAY lost) to meet someone I'd met over the Internet, and we had a great time for a weekend, but then he turned out to be psycho later on....lol

 

But after THAT, I met my now-fiance, who I've been with for 2.5 years, because, after talking on the internet and on the phone for about a month, I went up to see him. We clicked, and he moved down here the next week.....lol Do I recommend that for everyone? No, of course not. We just happened to "click", and things have gone well since then.

 

But Gilgamesh is absolutely right: don't drag out an internet relationship, because it will never go anywhere, ESPECIALLY if the party in question is in another country! Do all you can to meet that person, and look them in the face when you meet them and talk to them, so you can finally SEE the emotions there, and not just guess at them!

 

Mar

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Hello Everyone, thanks for the support and good wishes, but sorry to say it didnt work out.

 

I knew that the odds were against me on this, but it was a chance I needed to take, I wont get into details because this is a private thing, it was sweet but the timing is off, too soon for her.

 

I have no regrets, and if a similar situation was to develope again, I will take it.

 

Some may think me foolish to go so far in search of love, but my heart knows no distance. and I surely would have regreted that I didnt give it a chance. At worse im just a hopeless romantic.

 

So thanks again for everyones support.

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Hey Man, Sorry to hear all is not well. Women are a mystery to me, heck I dunno know why I even try. I am weak to a beautiful woman?

Well I hope at least you had some memories to bring back.

I would be a bit scared to plan to meet a chic online cause she may be unattactive to me. How did that go for you, was she at least hot! Was she attracted to you, that would concern me most.

Anyway I am in a relationship, kinda, and if we were to split I am not so sure I could risk meeting online! I know we have the new age of digital pics

and webcams, but pics do not detail everything. Hell maybe I am superficial, but I have standards and I am a nice looking man. I would just hate to meet someone and then feel like I was not attracted physically, and then tell her. You got courage Man! Just wandering how the attraction went? Was she psycho? Why did she agree to met you, have you drive half a day to be with her and not know for sure what she wanted? Do you think she met somebody else? Or do you think she was honest?

I hate mind games they play! Hope you find Miss Wonderful!

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To: DannyJo

 

I had seen pictures of her before meeting with her, but nothing could prepare me for what I saw in person, she was so very very attractive, and i felt like a teenager on a first date, i have to say I was intimidated a bit by her beauty.

 

I can only assume she found me ok, I didnt want to look insecure by asking her about that.

 

She wasnt Phycho or weird, she was very nice and I will cherish the time we spent together. let me put it this way, she believed she was ready to start over with someone new, she gave it her best shot, she realised it was too soon. I am not upset with her at all, I am glad that she at least gave it a try. and who knows maybe someday things will change. maybe they wont. I will not be contacting her though. not for a "pride" thing or anything like that.

 

to: Mar and Michelle

 

Im not going anywhere, Ill still be around trying to do my best to help folks out here. hey this is my home hehe and many of you folks are like family.

 

to: Hubman

 

Very true, I will keep on trying, eventually Ill find a girl thats ready for love (to receive it and give it). I hear some women are actually looking for nice guys, maybe its just a silly rumour.

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I am in a similar situation...someone is traveling accross several states to visit me and I'm really excited to meet him in person. We've been chatting and talking on the phone several times a day and it's going well thus far. However, when I mentioned it to a close friend of mine he freaked out and wanted me to promise him that I wouldn't see him. He said he was concerned for my safety.

 

I've already done the background check but aside from that I'm not sure what else I should do to make sure this guy isn't a psycho. I am completely comfortable talking to him and I don't get any weird vibes from him. In fact, were it not for my friend freaking me out just now, I wouldn't be concerned at all. The female friends I have mentioned this to have not given me any similar warnings, but maybe he knows something about men and internet dating that we females don't.

 

Any advice on what to do here?

 

(Sorry if I was supposed to post this as a new topic...I usually just read the messages instead of posting.)

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I wouldnt concern yourself with this, frankly I find it risky to date someone you just met in a bar or mall etc.

 

there are weirdos everywhere, so it makes no difference whether its the net or at the mall.

 

I am glad you found a match, and wish you well, if you were both honest with each other, things should go very well.

 

please keep us posted.

 

BTW, thousands upon thousands have met through the net, fallen in love and married. it happens every day. some people fear the net, usually because of ignorance or because of bad press, Net crimes get a lot of publicity.

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