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started taking anti depressants

MarkD

By MarkD
in Healing After Break Up or Divorce

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MarkD Enthusiast

MarkD

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I went to see my Doctor again today, and he finally said I should start on anti depressants. He is not a pill pusher and thought I might be able to make it through my breakup without them, but he is seeing that I need something to help me through this difficult situation. He said that since I have an obsessive/compulsive behavior, I am over analyzing everything and driving myself nutty. He said the medication will help calm my thoughts down and help me cope with the situation.

 

We ended up talking for 1 1/2 hours. he is such a good guy. he basically said that my ex is the type of person that will not look into herself or criticize herself and thereforeee that is why she will not work on our relationship. I am the one that challenged her morals, and not willing to work at anything.

 

Anyways...long story short...she is not willing to work at the relationship, so I have to move on with my life. This is really hard to swallow right now, because I am still trying to accept the fact that she is not going to be my wife and not going to be the one at my side for the rest of my life like we had planned.

 

I am still in the denial stage, but hopefully with his help, I will start moving forward.

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Dominic_M Contributor

Dominic_M

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So have I.

 

Got my perscription filled. Im a bit scared about it though. I hear mixed reviews on the type I got (Celexia). Some have told me that they do help you cope with the pain. others say they only mask it, not allowing yourself to fully heal from the pain.

 

I also hear there are sexual side effects (not that I am in any state of mind right now to be getting some). And other small side effects as well.

 

Im not a fan of taking medication, I prefer natural remedies but this is just too much for me this week, so I broke down and started them today.

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blueangel Experienced

blueangel

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Well I had a bad experience with antidepressents.

First zoloft made me so happy- euphoric emotions each day, but then I got immune to it. So they increased the dosage, which led me to become suicidal because the effects on my brain changed somehow. (and I wasnt suicidal beforehand, just dealing with grief after a loved one passed).

 

Second, wellbutrin- the dose was increased and split in the morning and the night. It gave me hallucinations after a few months, increased anxiety, panic attacks and insomnia. I was put in a pysch ward to be weened off- way to enjoy the last weeks of tenth grade. I actually believed I was being haunted by my deceased loved one. To the grief was added a terrifying dimension to experience.

 

After that experience, I have much more control over my mind because depression is easier to handle than losing sense of reality- and since I had to gain control of my mind while losing sense of reality, depression's almost nothing to me now. When my own brain goes "nutty" so to speak, I lay down and listen to it and it eventually fades. I dont add to it with worries nor try to fight it. It's good to say outloud what you are experiencing to remind yourself that the sane rational part of you is still there while all of this is going on. Put descriptions and words to the experience, and even say outloud (not in your head) "I feel as though I cannot control this right now" if you have to. Sometimes saying that gives a certain amount of relief, and is a step to feeling better.

 

When my heart feels pain, I lay down and feel it and do not blame myself or life. I simply cradle myself and think of the good things I have going for me, focus only on that until I am no longer hopeless, even if there is a problem overwhelming my life. I understand pyschology enough to know how important it is to do that, or have someone comfort you somehow (if you cant figure out how to comfort yourself- which is essential for living in general). If none of this works, take a space in your house or outside to exercise, get your heartbeat up, break a sweat if you can which will relieve tension in the brain.

 

Lastly, drink green tea (cold or hot). It's a natural energizer when you are feeling down. Plus it's healthy so you will feel you are doing one thing healthy for yourself that day, which makes none of it a waste, esp. if you continue forward.

 

Lastly lastly my advise from personal experience and research: Teach yourself to think positively. Write in a journal support for yourself, one simple goal to accomplish and any positive progress even if tiny. It was once said, "Motivation doesn't last." The answer to that is, "Neither does bathing, that's why it's recommended daily." Motivate yourself, ask another to, or grab hold to motivational quotes/mantras. Whatever helps you through everyday life, which we all truly suffer from... we just have to make the best of it. I also suggest the book "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl.

 

Understand: There is nothing wrong with pain, and there is nothing wrong with you for feeling it. Life can be a pretty painful thing, which many of us try to resist accepting. With acceptance comes less emotional struggle. Carry who you are proudly- you are strong if you are still alive. Good luck to you.

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rootcause43 Apprentice

rootcause43

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Here are some thoughts from a guy who has been there:

 

I have tried two ant-depressants over the years (Zoloft and Cymbalta) and am currently not taking any and hopefully never will again. For me, they helped a lot.

 

Here are my opinions and experiences:

 

1) Sexual side effects: Zoloft - Erections weren't as firm as they had been but were functional. Orgasms took forever and sometimes didn't happen at all. Cymbalta - Same effect as Zoloft but not as extreme (this was the main reason for switching).

 

2) Sleeping - Zoloft had no impact on my sleep (in a good way). With Cymbalta I would always wake up at least once during the evening and often would not be able to fall asleep.

 

3) Appetite/Weight Loss(Gain) - No impact from either

 

4) Thought processes/feelings - These medications did not mask the problems. They are not 'happy' pills nor do they make you 'not feel' anything. What they hopefully will do is allow you to not feel as hopeless about a situation. It may make it easier for you to get up in the morning and to fall asleep. To get back into a routine. All your thoughts are there but hopefully these meds allow the thoughts to race a little slower.

 

Whenever I have been on meds I have also met regularly with a therapist to help work on the underlying cause. If need be I could have stayed on these meds indefinitely and functioned fine. But I am now off of them. The cognitive therapy with the therapist helped immensly and I still see her (the therapist) at least twice a month for maintenance purposes.

 

Good luck

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Supa_gurl Enthusiast

Supa_gurl

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I take fluoxetine which is generic form Prozac. It has worked for me for the past 5 years. I have been on and off it, as soon as I feel like I can cope, I stop taking it. Couple of months pass, i get down, cry all the time, and snap at family members, so I think it best to stay on.

note improved my sex life (hee hee) no bad side effects for me.

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MarkD Enthusiast

MarkD

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my Doc prescribed Cipralex. He said for some it will wake you up, but for some will make you drowsy. I took one not too long ago, and Im falling asleep at my desk..but this is good, it will help me sleep.

 

He said the same about my thoughts. It will help slow my thoughts down and help me cope with the situation. I am not too worried about sexual side affects for now since I don't plan on being active until I work out my issues.

 

I am also going to be seeing a counselor for help on dealing with the core issues....

 

If someone would have told me this is the situation I would be facing a year ago....I would have laughed at them and said "there's no way I would ever be like that". Funny how relationships can really mess with you when you are REALLY into them.

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jmax2157 Rookie

jmax2157

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Can these drugs be used as a pick-me-up in the sense that I'm not normally depressed but my recent break up has left me in ruins? I mean, can I take it for a few months, get back to normal, then slowly come off them? Unfortunately my doctor (and his partner) are booked for the next two weeks so is there any over the counter stuff that might help me make it? I always thought these depression drugs were for people who suffer from depression for years. Mine is brought on by this one traumatic event.

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MarkD Enthusiast

MarkD

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jmax...that's why I am on them....my relationship of 5 years ended 5 months ago and it is just too much to handle right now. My Doc says I can take them for a while until I feel better and then come off them....I won't need to continue forever...

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Miss Firecracker Collaborator

Miss Firecracker

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My doctor prescribed me Cymbalta today - I've been having a hard time trying to beat depression on my own for several months. Hopefully this will help.

 

I've tried several anti-depressants in the past. Zoloft worked for me but I gained tons of weight and though it helped with Anxiety - it helped too much. Sometimes you need a little anxiety in your life - helps prevent you from doing silly things like eating six hot dogs even though they taste good; and buying yet another BMW even though they are incredible to drive ;-)

 

I have taken Zoloft over a year, and I had gained a few pounds. But I'm working out a little more and eating less and have already dropped almost every pound. I don't think it was the Zoloft that caused that at all. I've just had to watch my weight since I've been in my 20's. My weight has always been up and down by about 5 lbs.

 

And I still have a little anxiety in my life even with it, but it's nothing to compare with what it used to be. My doctor told me yesterday that it has worked so well for me that he is giving me a prescription for another whole year. Yah!

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Miss Firecracker Collaborator

Miss Firecracker

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are you comfortable with being on drugs? that scares me because what happens one day when you can't afford to buy them anymore, or even become dependent on them

 

I'm very comfortable being on drugs. I had lost any pleasure in life, so what did I have to lose? You may not be at that point. I was to the point that I didn't want to get around people AT ALL.

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MarkD Enthusiast

MarkD

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that was the signal that my Doctor said he felt it was time for me to go on the medication. He asked me what I like to do and what makes me happy, and I honestly couldn't answer since I lost all love for anything right now...

 

He said that is the point where people can get deep into clinical depression. He said It isn't too late to stop me from getting even worst..but the medication will help with my thoughts and outlook

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