ilovethatgirl Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 Hello all, the people who will be responding to this thread pretty much know my whole situation here. So I like to stay close to this girl for three reasons: one, let's face it, she's the most dazzling person I've ever seen, two, it still takes me a while to work up the courage to talk to her, and three, I want to be nearby in case something maybe happens to her (extremely unlikely, but then my mind is strange and different, lol). I don't follow her 24/7, but I DO tend to kind of "pop up" a lot of the places she goes. I just wanted to know if this could be interpreted as stalking her, and that I might weird her out and alienate her. (bearing in mind this is a 14-yr-old we're talking about - an unusually bright one, but still a teen) Thanks in advance for any answers. (EDIT: This post is somewhat misleading, see my post below. I don't really follow her everywhere she goes) Link to comment
Mysterygirl Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 I might consider your actions to be borderline stalker ... Link to comment
annie24 Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 I think you should just ask her out. I'm sure she might be starting to think you like her. So, make a move - suggest a study date, get some coffee or ice cream, go to the park, go skating, anything. Make a move. If you keep doing this WITHOUT asking her out, then yes, it will be stalking. At first it is sweet, then it is stalking. Link to comment
ilovethatgirl Posted October 25, 2007 Author Share Posted October 25, 2007 I have, in fact, asked her out... but she has said she is more comfortable in large groups of people, and invited me to hang out with her and her friends, which I do quite often... I'm trying hard to help her feel more comfortable with me so we can go on a date sometime soon. And my original post is kind of misleading, reading it again... really the only reason I post this is because she took off for the bus before I had gotten a chance to say goodbye to her for the day, so I followed her, and as I walked I suddenly wondered if she might think I was stalking her. Link to comment
Mysterygirl Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 hmmm well being a mom, im going to say that 14 is to young to be dating. I think you should respect her and be friends in a group. I think its great that she told you that she likes to be in a group (i bet her parents told her that) Keep being the way you are and I think she might start thinking your a weirdo.. Link to comment
Kelebek Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 Group dating is perfectly normal at your age. Then again, I think I had my first real date (movie date) when I was 15. Anyway, she told you what makes her feel more comfortable - she hasn't rejected you. No need to folllow her around, just enjoy the time you do spend with her. Link to comment
ilovethatgirl Posted October 25, 2007 Author Share Posted October 25, 2007 I get the feeling that what she says to me, SHE says, not her parents... I don't quite know how to explain it, but though it's been for a short time I DO know her, and nothing she's said sounded... unlike her. I mean, she's told me before she loves parties, hell she's friends with pretty much everybody in her grade... And from what she's said to me, I think (I do not assume, I think, I understand this may not be the case) that once she feels more comfortable with me we can go on a date (and if all goes well more thereafter). And thank you for your thoughts on the whole stalking thing, I'll ease up a bit... a lot... but I'm still going to talk to her, lol. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 at 15, not so much a stalker. but you can be considered one. you are her very secret admirer though. if you get older and do this where you aren't on a small high school campus, i'd say call the cops on yourself. Link to comment
ilovethatgirl Posted October 25, 2007 Author Share Posted October 25, 2007 Ouch.... brutal, but got the job done I guess. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 or if you sit in the back of her 5th period class. and it's not your class...kind of nuts. Link to comment
ilovethatgirl Posted October 25, 2007 Author Share Posted October 25, 2007 That'd be a neat trick since we have 4 periods... and I'm in her period 1 class, I came to this highschool halfway through last year so I missed some grade 9 classes that I need... Link to comment
ghost69 Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 Hi ilovethatgirl...I see nothing wrong with some light stalking personally as long as you would never harm her in any way but you are merely admiring her from afar and you would even be happy for her if she was with someone else. I think it's sweet and there's nothing wrong with adoring people but that's just me. I'd just limit the times you happened to be in her vicinity a little bit, just in case it is interpreted as freaky.This is the girl who turned up at her ex's college to do a course tee hee love Lady D x this is nuts. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 you don't have a doll made of her hair at least. Link to comment
ilovethatgirl Posted October 25, 2007 Author Share Posted October 25, 2007 No, of course not! .......maybe...... Link to comment
Jeffster Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 It's just that I have a real problem with the word stalker. Don't EVER do it!!! Link to comment
ilovethatgirl Posted October 26, 2007 Author Share Posted October 26, 2007 Believe me I don't like the word either (I've seen my share of CSI and Law & Order: SVU)... which is why I don't want to EVER do it. Link to comment
Censored Posted October 26, 2007 Share Posted October 26, 2007 Dude, if you are just "popping" up where she is etc and it is not purely coincidence, then you are going to freak her out. Regardsless of your age, it is not far off stalking, the only difference being that she hasn't told you to bugger off. I imagine that you would be very rejected if she did that and I would wonder how you would react considereing all the "time" you have put into trying to get a relationship happening. Just back off a large bit and enjoy the group friend situations. The fact that you are asking for advice on this pretty much answers your own question, you are going in a bit too heavy and borderline freaky. Also the whole bit about wanting to be near her in-case something "happens" is a little sad and delusional. I know that when you have a crush on someone it can make you do things out of the ordinary, just try to distance yourself from that and be patient. Link to comment
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