Ad/hd

[CynicalGuitarist]

Anybody else have it? I know a lot of people seem to think of it as an "excuse", and that "it's all in the head" (for example, my friends and family), but that's because they don't have to live with it. It makes my life harder, because it's one of the main reasons I make so many mistakes, a dumb blonde might seem smarter than me on a bad day. In fact, my old next door neighbor thought I had autism. It's tough when people all around me are succeeding... while I'm left behind. I can't do a lot of things. All of my senses are extremely sensitive, and while that means I have over 20/20 vision and great hearing... I also react quickly which means I flinch at any sudden noise, am heat sensitive (which is tough 'cause I work near a huge pizza oven), can become depressed or elated at the slightest of incidents, and can feel pain quicker than your average human being. Because of it, I suck at school and ended up giving up. If you want a mental fix on what it's like to have it, it's like being on speed 24/7... without the malignant biological effects. The only thing that'll slow down the thoughts is caffiene or marijuana... but both make it difficult to sleep at night. Often, I am lazy and lethargic... I have staggering writers' block, and can't perform the simplest of tasks; plus, when people keep discouraging me, I keep screwing up more and more and more and more. It's an endless cycle. People always tell me that "I" am god, and we are all gods... I used to believe it... but I think it's just wishful thinking; just like communism... I didn't choose to live with ADHD. I hate my brain. In fact, I hate this human being I'm forced to inhabit on a day-to-day basis.

 

Sleep is my friend. My dreams are incoherant and pointless, but that's what makes them great. I've done all kinds of things I can't do on the physical plane, and my dreams are where I'm happy. Wouldn't it be great to sleep forever? Just me and my pointless, useless dreams with no facade of "reality". I wouldn't have to worry about time or science. But hey, as one of my heroes, the late Bill Hicks put it "... it's just a ride".

 

All I can do is hope I can go somewhere with my singing ability (choir class was the only class in ninth grade I actually cared about... and at a couple points, cause none of the other males showed up, I was the only male really singing) because I want to be a singer/songwriter in a band... while utilizing my moderate talent at guitar. Otherwise, my life is a wreck.

[MadGenius]

I don't think all that stuff is because of ADHD. I have ADHD, and worse than 20/1000 vision, terrible ears, and sluggish reflexes.

 

Like you, however, my mind whirs at boggling rates, and I can't concentrate on anything for too long without my mind wandering.

 

The laziness and lethargy is because we're depressed. Anhedonia (not taking pleasure in anything) is the only symptom of depression besides depressed mood.

 

I too, sleep all the time. It's better than being awake. I know how you feel man. Sleeping isn't easy though. How can I fall asleep when my mind is so out of control?

 

Are you on any meds? I hate to admit is (seriously) but they help. Times I've thought I was okay, and stopped the meds for a bit....it was bad.

 

I feel weak not being able to overcome this with sheer willpower. It really does seem like such a small problem, or an 'excuse'. But....it isn't.

[CynicalGuitarist]

Well, the "dream" aspect is what has gotten me into looking into Astral projection.

[MadGenius]

That might be pretty cool....so long as it doesn't consume you. Hell, maybe you can meet some people that way.

 

I knew a girl once who was into astral projection and all that hippie stuff.

 

I can't sit still long enough to make it work, let alone 'clear my mind'. It's all really meditation and self hypnosis. That could actually be very helpful to you if you get into it.

[CynicalGuitarist]

That might be pretty cool....so long as it doesn't consume you. Hell, maybe you can meet some people that way.

 

I knew a girl once who was into astral projection and all that hippie stuff.

 

I can't sit still long enough to make it work, let alone 'clear my mind'. It's all really meditation and self hypnosis. That could actually be very helpful to you if you get into it.

 

You can't really be "consumed" by astral projection because of the "cord" that attaches your astral self to your physical self.

 

Actually, dreaming is a form of astral projection... especially dreams that are extremely vivid or outlandish. What I'm trying to learn... is to harness that power. I'm working at it, but I'm far from being able to control my dreams.

 

However, projecting through meditation or self-hypnosis... is a whole 'nother beast, and much, much, much more difficult.

[MadGenius]

By 'consumed' I meant 'doing it all the time'.

 

From what I know of it, it's pretty meditative. You have to be in the right state of mind when you fall asleep.

 

It's just controlling your dreams, you can't actually project and see what's going on in the real world. It might seem like it, but it's just the 'real world' built by your mind.

 

I've controlled my dreams a few times. It's awesome, the feeling that you realize your dreaming, but don't wake up. It gives you full power over everything.

 

Recently when I realize I'm dreaming my vision gets blocked out, or I can't move. That's gotta be a reflection on my frustrated state of mind.

[CynicalGuitarist]

By 'consumed' I meant 'doing it all the time'.

 

From what I know of it, it's pretty meditative. You have to be in the right state of mind when you fall asleep.

 

It's just controlling your dreams, you can't actually project and see what's going on in the real world. It might seem like it, but it's just the 'real world' built by your mind.

 

I've controlled my dreams a few times. It's awesome, the feeling that you realize your dreaming, but don't wake up. It gives you full power over everything.

 

Recently when I realize I'm dreaming my vision gets blocked out, or I can't move. That's gotta be a reflection on my frustrated state of mind.

 

I could never dedicate my life to AP. My real aspiration is to be a vocalist of a band and do world tours... and when I can't do that anymore, I want to be a vocal coach. Big aspiration, I know, but singing is one of the only ways (if not THE only way) I can release some of that insecurity and stress out of my system.

 

AP isn't just controlling your dreams... that's lucid dreaming. While the two are inter-related, AP is more about separating the "I" from the "me"... I being spiritual self and me being physical self, in essense.

[MadGenius]

I dunno much about it. I gave it a shot a few years ago, got impatient, you know the drill.

 

What I want to do....is live out of a big tour bus, and just drive around seeing and doing stuff and writing about it.

 

Hell, when you're a hotshot musician, I'll drive your band around. Something like that would be awesome. No way I can stay in the same house and go to the same job every day.

[Siriana]

I really think my dad had AD.

I really do.

But he was born in 1940 during the 2. world war and he lived in socialism ,as a kid and in a huge part of his adoulthood, so it's not like they cared in diagnozing him or even knew whats that back than.

 

He was unable to be persistent, he was way to impatient to listen to other people, he was unable to do boring tasks, he thought something is wrong with me because I was reading a book for my exam for 4 hours without going out.....etc.

 

Now he was also brilliant in cooking, making jewlery and he knew to draw really nice, aslo he was grat at sports.

I guess thats what he got as a compensation.

[Gratsy]

I don't really believe in ADHD. I believe in tendencies that aren't good. These tendencies are harder for some to get rid of them over others. Its all about mindset. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a child and it was a bit of a handicap but if you choose to fight being put in the box labeled ADHD, you will accomplish a lot more.

[RelaxByWater84]

I have ADD and I use all sorts of methods to help me. Before I study I spray Lavander/Vanilla aromatherapy spray and it really calms me down to work. I also chew gum since that is a form of physical movement I need. This will come as a complete shock to you(sarcastically said) but I drink coffee everyday to help speed up my brain in the morning. I also take Focus Factor that has things that are not in my diet. It's basically a brain food vitamin. I will take breaks from working a take a walk around my dorm to get some fresh air and some exercise.

 

Don't worry about falling behind. I am always "getting it" after I take the test, however, what I get stays with me and it has helped me in classes I took later in that subject.

 

You seem to have a great interest in music so you might want to try music therapy. It's where you use music to express yourself and for some it's really cathartic.

 

Hope this helps.

[annie93]

Hey Cynicalguitarist!

 

You seem to consider (and may be right) that ADD is the biggest obstacle in your life. Instead of giving up why don't you take steps to make it better? It seems like you have an adversion to taking meds for it, but I really think you should give them a chance. I am sure that not all ADD meds on the market are made of concentrated speed (or whatever you said) and its way to early in life to just give up on your mind. It would also be such a shame if you did because you are obviously very intelligent and can contribute a lot with your mind.

 

Finding a way of treating your ADD should be your top priority right now, especially as you say its preventing you from doing things you want to do and being happy.

 

Besides, you have obviously contributed a lot to enotalone (both in your own threads, and in other peoples) You must have somewhat of an attention span to be able to do that.

[CynicalGuitarist]

most of my replies or posts are extremely short. The computer is the only thing that really helps my attention span.

[deperatemom]

I am dealing with my son's ADHD right now. He is 7 and have recently tried homeopathic medice which seems to be working great! without the zombie effects of Ritilin, Excedrell, etc. Try Focus ADHD for Adults by the company called link removed. I also agree with Gratsy about labels...everyone has good traits and not everyone can be doctors or have university degrees, hence, if you are passionate and are good at playing your guitar, Go for it! Have faith in your abilities. The best of luck to you.