I guess I've forgiven him

[Belle]

Only a week after receiving the email from my ex, I somehow have let it go. I've let go of the resentment. I let go of how I had wished things had ended up as opposed to reality. For whatever reason, it wasn't meant to be. And I'm no longer fighting it. It's not because I'm dating someone else. Things aren't secure or written in stone there.

 

I think it took a week of letting it sit on teh back burner, wondering how I was going to let go. I prayed a lot for forgiveness. Somewhere in the middle of that it hit me. It wasn't going to work out between the two of us even if he hadn't lied. I didn't have to date him for years and end up with even more disappointment. I've been seeking stability and he is entirely unstable. I am now free to experience something else, something inline with what I'm looking for.

 

I wrote him back and I forgave him and asked him to do the same as I was fairly mean to him in order to push him away. I just wanted to clear teh air from my end and wish him well. I did care about him, and I still wish the best for him.

[barbielovesmac]

It's great that you were able to forgive.

 

Forgivness (real forgivness) is one of the hardest things to do. To look past hurt and resentment is a big step. Kudos to you.

 

Of course you cared about it, and it's wonderful that you wish him the best. You are a good person. Some people live their entire lives with resentment, and that's no way to live your life.

 

You're supposed to be happy. Be happy, live your life. I'm happy for you, I really am. Not many people can do this.

 

Good luck!

[mylifeisasoapoprea]

I agree that it was good to be able to forgive. That is the hardest thing to do. Its easier to hate a person than love them. But its better to forgive than hate. The best things are hard to do and you over came that well.

[Coyote9]

A week....that's moving really fast through the grief...well done!

[Belle]

A week....that's moving really fast through the grief...well done!

 

Tell me about it. I was wondering if I could even forgive him at all. But it's been a year since we last spoke, so there's nothing raw in my feelings. I'm grateful, because now I can be open to what's right for me and not beat my head up against a wall for something that wasn't. Not forgiving him was hurting me way more than it was hurting him.

 

Time and space give you more objectivity. His email was the essense of him. Objectively, I realized that no matter how much we cared about each other, we're just not compatible.

 

Life's really short and I hope I can remember that the next time I have to let go of what I want. Invariably, I have received better when I stopped trying to control things.