lolgirl

So I heard today form some mutual friends today about how much you've CHANGED in the past couple of years. And these mutual friends have known you since you were a wee little teenager. They didn't know any details about our BU, but wanted to share their views on what a different person you've become. They said now, you think you are so high and mighty, how you're the coolest person in the world, how your poop doesn't stink...and its so funny, I totally noticed that about you too. You were so sweet and humble when I first met you...what happened? Did being with me really boost your confidence that much? Did I really stroke your ego THAT much that you felt the need to act like you're the coolest thing in the world? I was only doing all that to support you, but deep down, I hated how you were changing. I'm glad our mutual friends told me all this...because I just added it to my list of reasons why I am so glad I walked away when you dumped me.

Im starting kickboxing classes. Your picture is going on the punching bag...I'm going to beat the stupid out of your photo.

I didn't dream about you last night, thank god. I slept a good 5 hours solid. Here's to brighter days ahead without you.

I am going to try to go to bed soon. I am praying that I don't have a dream about you tonight....I can't take the pain of you being a part of my life anymore. I just want you gone from my memory. I wish I never met you, I wish I never fell in love with you, I wish I never gave you my heart. I don't even want you in my dreams...just go away. Please...leave me alone. You've hurt me so much.

I hate you. So so SOOOOOOOO much. I had a long chat with a family friend today about his recent breakup and his commitment phobia...and I couldnt help thinking that was YOU. It hurt me so much hearing everything today...so much that I cried for the first time in two months. My body is shutting down again, my mind is racing, my broken heart is breaking again. I hate you...I hate you...I hate you. You are as good as dead to me.

Happy early birthday. I was going to make this weekend one of the best times of your life...until you threw me out like yesterday's garbage. Oh boy, I'm glad you did...I would have hated doing something nice for you, now knowing what I know about you. Glad you're alone and single this weekend, you d-bag.

Oh yeah...I still hate you.

Yep. I still hate you.

Dangit...I wish I posted here when I started my NC! Oh well, I guess today is Day one. I haven't officially spoken to my ex for 3-4 weeks. Our conversations since our BU was limited to me getting my things back from his house because we lived together. Day one on SuperDave's challenge: Meh...nothing much going on here. I hardly think of my ex and if I do, its mostly negative thoughts. It helps that I sent him a NC letter about a month ago. I have no desire to talk to him whatsoever and I made it very clear to him to stay away from me. I am confident I will reach day 30 with only minor speed bumps .

Dear ex, I saw the ex-ex today...yeah...the one you HAAATE. The one you wanted to punch in the face when you saw him. The one that you thought you could be better than, but you failed miserably at. We had a good time today. He's waaaaay better in bed than you are. I'd go into physical characteristics of how he is better in bed, but I think you get the picture.

I almost texted you tonight to go off on you and all your bull * * * * games. You're so lucky I have ENA instead.

Quit talking * * * * on me to our mutual friends, you jackhole. Seriously, what are we, like in the 5th grade??

Keep telling everyone about how you broke up with me because I was crazy. I will tell them about your freaky stalkerish obsession with saving photos of girls (some of whom are your buddy's GF's) in individually divided, labelled folders on your hard drive. I'll save the naked photos of the girl you work with and the disgusting STD you carried without telling me for another time. You FREAK.

I am hating you today. Seriously. I think about how much of a fool I was for you throughout our relationship and it makes me sick. I think about how much of myself I sacrificed because you told me in the beginning that I was the one for you. Then you covered up your lies with more lies, and even more lies, and I'm the one who is licking her wounds in the end while you enjoy life like nothing happened. I hate you. I wish I never met you. I wish I never fell in love with you and planned to spend the rest of my life with you. At this point in my life, if I never see your name or your face again for the rest of my life, I will be the happiest person alive. I hope your life one day is filled with misery and sorrow and you look back on everything I did for you and you say to yourself, wow...she was amazing, she taught me what true love is. Because at that point, you will be nothing to me but a memory. And the fact that you will be taking up valuable hardware space in my brain is even giving you way more than you deserve.

You are a loser for dumping me after you were borderline cheating behind my back. Many people also told me you were. And the best part is, deep down, you know you are a loser too. I saw it in the tears you cried for me when you dumped me. Boo-hoo...Cry me a river... Peace out and have a great life! Thanks for being the scapegoat because God knows, I would have never had the guts to dump you. I was committed to you even after I found out all of your lies. I guess I loved you too much, but at least now I get everyone's sympathy and you have to live with the guilt...

Bump! I love this thread! Thank you so much! I'm not holding onto the thought that me and my ex are going to get back together, but its so nice to hear some heartwarming stories.