2BinLuv

I've been in a relationship for a year and a half. I am a very open person and I do feel that if a man wants to look at porn or naked chicks, then it's okay and natural just as long as they are honest about it. I know that it is normal to look, but it makes me really upset after telling my boyfriend that i'ts okay, yet he lies and tells me he doesn't do it. Well, the other day, i noticed that he was visiting links "which his friends sends him" and i was deeply hurt. He was hiding that from me as if he was guilty. i mean, if he saw a nice body, he could have been like "ya, this girl has a nice body, check it out" and then send me the link... but he does it secretly. That means he has nothing to hide. Anyhow, i asked him why he looks at them and he said not to get aroused but just b/c he was curious. He said that he saw that the chicks were hot and that that he wanted to admire the bodies, but then he goes off to say that he thinks I have the best body out of them all. Then I went on to ask him why then, if he thinks that... would he view the sites if nothing compares. There is much more but this is just a summary. Please tell me how I should feel. Am I being irrational?

first off, I would like to applaud you for being very open and honest about your issues in your life. It takes a lot to admit to what you are doing wrong. A therapist, counselor, and medication does help... but only if you take them seriously. They can't help you if you don't really try to help yourself. As far as the zoloft, make sure you continue to take it even if you feel like you don't need it. It won't work if you stop taking them. As for the fact that you feel that you are being a horrible mother and that you are tired, it's okay to feel like that. And you already did the first step to admiting to it. but first thing is first, you can't attack a situation by doing it all at once. First of all, I think you need to stop this on again off again relationship with your husband. I feel like you both are not into it and that you are just wasting each others time and hurting your children even more. After you take care of that and also break it off with the other guy, you have the energy, time, and dedication to your kids. Once you do achieve that relationship with your kids, and you do regain your confidence in yourself, you will be able to have the ability and compacity to build on meeting new people and have a healthy relationship... The thing to remember is that you have to attack the problems one at a time.

well, honestly I feel that she is not ready for a relationship and that she is being immature about it. It seem like to me that she just wants to play games.