steelsabre

hey just a quick update, i managed to give her one week lol, before calling her again, nothing changed. then another week, called her again. We met up, i found out she went on a date, but she realised that she still loves me, its ok because i did the same thing. I couldnt even look at this girl i went out with. We met up last night and spoke... she still needs time. Wants us to separate and then come back together as differant more mature people..( aka she wants to have a single life for awhile) and to be honest my sense of dignity is returning, so i think stuff it, why put my self through so much pain. So i have to let it go now. Ive tried my hardest.. time will tell if anything else changes... but the thing is its always on my mind... always... i cant go out and enjoy myself.. it just takes control and i think about it. Its a good time to learn some control over that raging monkey in my mind all i can say is if they ask for time.. give to them.. work on yourself as much as possible.. now if i only took the advice from this thread my situtation would of have been very differant now. What you have to do when a woman tell you she needs a break... is leave.. take your stuff... and move on.. she will come back or she wont.. trying to push her into giving you what you want will only push her away... You need to pull her back with attraction, and nothing else... neediness and "love" just pushes them away. I just hope its not too late to late, as this is all only just become my train of thought. Damn i love her so much

thank you, you are right. The initial shock has gone, it hurts like hell, but the simple fact is i love her. It the fear of possibility that haunts me, who is she with, what is she doing, is she with someone else, and i go through all these sceanarios in my head what could be happening" but then i realise that if she truly loves me, and whats to be with be she will in the end. It would of been easyer if she just ended it right out, but its like she is keeping me around just in case lol..... i love her, and ill be here for her, but for myself first. So as much as it pains me, no contact. and if she dosnt call me back... then the pain will subside eventually, the great depression will evenutaly dim till there is nothing left but fond memories. I will always love her. Thank you

thanks to everyone thats written to me... its amazing to know that ppl care and take the time to write back, even thou you dont know me.. you guys rock. Im gonna try to do NC lol (new word i learnt here lol) let her miss me... and see what happens... and play it cool as best i can. Ill let you guys know what happens eh

i think its a great idea... sign me up eh

I am the same as you, my first real love cheated on me... and its had a rippling effect all thrtough my life... Its effected my trust with everyone, i dont know how to deal with it either.

She met a couple that are 30+ and they look after her son after school, its funny this happened around the time she met these people, she started staying for dinner at there place etc, over a week. She now goes to the gym with this woman before tafe sometimes she ended up seeing a personal traniner that she met on a night out ages ago and he told her she can come in and watch him and ask him questions etc and she is on tuesday next week, I guess its a good oppitunity for her as she wants to be a personal trainer and the point is she told me about it, but still it wracks my nerves... I mean stuff like that kills me. i guess when it comes down to it im afraid of possibility... lol This is frucked and i feel for who ever is going through anything similar!

Zaphod, Echo, thanks for you replys, you guys are right its good to hear the rational thing to do. I hope i can do it because she means so much to me, Zaphod im sorry to hear about your gf dumping you i can imagine what your going through eh..

Hi all, I guess i needed to say something to someone about this issue im having.. feels strange writing this down but ill try an explain it to you guys as best i can. I ve been in a relationship with an amazing girl for over a year and it was great i mean i am so in love with this girl, she has a 5 year old son. The good thing about that is when i have my 6 year old daughter they get along really well. i am 24 she is 22. I am writing this because she broke up with me about a week ago and has asked me for some space, i find it extremely hard to just let go and forget about it because well for the last year we have done everything together. I have some problems getting things done and she wants me to fix myself before us going any further. This is the email she wrote me on the night after our break up She wants no communion, for a while but to me thats just wrong lol.. ive had past relationship when my ex has done a similar thing to "let me down" easy. Im having trouble not calling her and giving her what she needs. I feel like such a child, for the first time in a long time im just haplessly in a wreck. ITs all i can think about. I obsess over it, i over annalyse everything, to the point where i make up the worst case scenario situations in my mind, I am going crazy! I think to myself grow the hell up and to think rationally but my gut instinct tells me not to let this happen. I know i have had some problems i do suffer from ADD, and it reflects alot in everything i do. I know i need to work on myself and i am. But she said she cant be there for me anymore. She is at tafe doing personal a training course. I feel like she is moving on with her life and leaving me behind. In the back of my mind i tell my self that she doesn't want to be with me so why am i doing this, putting my self through all this pain. I should just let it go right ? I really dont know what to do, i know im not strong enough not to call her and leave her alone, and i know in the end i will bugger it all up.