Lysander29

I had the exact same thing on my bday the other week and I did not respond. It's just not worth it. Like Blender told me, what if I did respond with a "Thank you" or something similar? I would probably be wondering if I would get a reply and it could turn into an endless cycle. Blender mentioned something very good- ex's tend to do this so they can feel better about themselves, and it doesn't merit any response since it was what can be deemed as "obligatory". Unless intentions are anything else, no reason to reply, - 8 weeks here of strict NC.

Happy Birthday= It's mine too! Yep got a txt from my ex, but I'm not returning it... (see other thread on it if interested)

Take a look at the NC Guide that was put up here: This should shed some light on NC. Yes its tough, but it has to be done.

Hello Everyone- just want to start by saying hello and that I've basically read almost all the threads up until last May or so. SD - great advice you are giving. It was very uplifting to "watch" OCD on his personal transition. Well, my story is pretty familiar with many posts. My GF (now ex) were together for just over a year. She had decided to end it in late October. This was the second major relationship I've had. The last one I broke every rule in the book! Pleading, emailing, snail mail, you name it. Safe to say that that one is long since dead. That was four years ago. I vowed to not do that again. In the current/recent relationship, things were fading a little over the past two months. I could see it. No doubt she did too. We had been very close, though, and I had treated her great. Her previous bf's were by far worse. She was once married as well a few years ago, but this ended very quickly as the then-husband ended up in prison! She had no idea and filed for divorce almost immediately as expected and finally got her name back. She also claims to have never loved him to begin with- possible immigration things there (she is not from the US) One of the things that led up to this breakup was the fact that she never wants to marry again- I can understand that. I'm not even in a place to consider that at this point. I'm just not ready for it. I'm 30, She's 31. So, for all the talk of NC, I have been following it since I left her apartment almost 4 weeks ago after she had decided to end it. No calls, Nothing. Sure it sucks here and there and its a rollar coaster of emotions all the time, but you need to keep busy. I have since joined a gym, got a personal trainer (first time in about 10 years) and even went into therapy just to discuss these past two relationships and what went on. It is all about me in NC, but sure I wonder if "the call" comes in. One issue is that she is good friends with my buddy's wife and they talk from time to time. In practicing NC, I have felt the need to even pull back from them as to not have her act as any conduit to the ex. So I am hanging in here and will post- this board has some great history on it.