becsj

You aren't being rude at all, thanks for your honesty. I guess that I just feel guilty now as I have gone back to him and he's being who i always wanted him to be, but now Im not into it 100% and I like somebody else. You are probably right though, I shouldnt have gone back a third time

Some brill advice. I have been struggling with the whole Christianity thing, I came to believe in it a few years ago as I trully felt that God spoke to me and I felt so good and strong for it. However, the path for Christians is definitely not an easy one and with my boyfriend and friends not believing my life has felt very conflicted since. Last year was quite tough for me and I tried to reach out to God many many times but really felt that it didnt help me in any way. In fact, it made me feel worse as Id wonder why he would ignore me yet 'speak' to the other guys at church. For the last few months I have given up and to be honest feel better for it. However, I cant ignore the fact that deep down i do believe there is a God and that he did speak to me once, it is just frustrating that since i have felt nothing and have had none of the guidance that i crave. I guess that it is just part of my spiritual journey and you are moving along yours too. The fact that you acknowledge your sprituality and even think about it is a positive thing, just keep exploring it and good luck!

Well, Ive been seeing a guy for just over a year now and at the start I really had strong feelings for him despite the fact he was very immature and didnt know how to treat me properly (would flirt outrageously with other girls in front of my face, have women over to dinner that he knew i didnt like as they would feel his bum in front of my face, etc with his flatmate and not invite me, etc). He always said he loved me though and I guess I thought he would change as when things were good between us they were really good. Anyway, at the end of the summer he finished with me and then asked for me to go back. I went back as I really missed him (as you do!) and we were fine for a while but things didnt seem quite right so I questioned it and then he admitted it wasnt right for him and ended it again. I was very upset but I was strong and just got on with it again. After a couple of weeks the grovelling came again with all of the 'I love yous' and yep, you guessed it, I went back again!! The thing is though, this time he really is being a much more respectful person and I really believe he regrets everything and does love me. BUT, now Im not that sure about everything, I really think that something snapped the second time he dumped me and I dont feel passionate about him any more. There is also somebody else that I have developed feelings for and now I feel like the guilty bad person despite all the crap my boyfriend put me through before (although I know that I did let him). I know that I probably need to finish it as I feel really guilty about being dishonest to him and it feels like we are now just drifting. Is splitting up the right thing to do?!! Sorry for the long rant!!

I'm not saying it's the same as my situation at all, but I find that when the guy thinks you aren't interested anymore or are interested in other guys they panic and run back. My ex and I have split up 3 times (more what he wanted than me) and after each time about a week later he runs back promising me the world. Then when we are settled again he backs off again, making me feel like a mug. I am totally not saying this is what he is doing, just be on guard - if he stays this way then great! Make sure you want to be with him because you value him though, not because of the gifts, etc - that won't bring happiness for ever.