I've read a couple of the other threads on this forum, and I realize this kind of question has been posted alot, but I guess all of us although in similar situations, are all still at different poitns in that situation...hah or something like that
Anways, heres my take.
I've known this girl since my first year of highschool, we're both in grade 12 now and about to graduate. I'm am sure of one thing, I'm crazy crazy crazy in "like" of here. I don't know what love feels like, so i'm not going to say that i'm in love, I just know i really like her. I'm very attracted to her.
Since we've met we've been quite close. We talk on the phone for hours on end, and ususally when something goes wrong I amt he first person who she calls (Like when she htought her parents were going to divorce, or after she got into a car accident). The problem is,...she doesn't know I'm lesbian, although who knows she might have an inkling. Actually only one person in my life knows right now (my cousin) and we don't even disscuss it very openly.
I often find her very close to me. Like we'd jsut be standing there, and she would come next to me, her shoulder right next to mine. Or we'd be at a movie and she'd always lean towards me so our shoulder or elbows woudl touch. We always talk for hours and hours one end, like I'd be driving her home from something, and we'd just sit in her drivway till like 2 am and either talk or do other random stuff.
She sometimes seems to get a jealous when I go out with my other friends who are girls. I remember this one week, when I hung out with this other girl everyday from morning till night, and she got really really jealous. She kept telling the other girl how she wanted to go jogging with me and her in the morning (thats what we were doing). But more or less, why i know it really bugged her is when I drove her home she addmitted it to me. She said that ya its bugged her alot, and how'd in her life I've been the closest person to her...well things got all patched up after that.
I don't want to mess things up on my last year of school in this city. But I know I've liked her for a pretty long time now too, and if there is a chance I don't want to miss it. She is the typical girly girl though, so i've always figured she never swung that way...I guess it would just be to risky if I did possibly tell her what I really felt like. I don't know, I've always tried to weigh the pro and cons and the reality vs the fantasies. Like how maybe she is jsut always clos to me cuz she a touchy person, but then again I swear she never lets anyone else get into her bubble like that. Or maybe she's jsut getting jealous about those other people simply out of a moure friendbase jealousy....and not the way I thought of it. I really don't know.
What do you think?
