lizzy22

Thanks for all your advice. I will read these posts over if and when I feel weak. Dannysgirl, you mentioned putting his parking pass in the mail, and I was also thinking about that. It may be kinda hard for me to drive down to his place though, because he lives about 45 min away, and I think the drive may make me miss him. That may sound strange, but I just don't want to accidently run into him, and if he IS home, I dont want to just leave it on the porch because then he REALLY may not get it. Do you think it would be wise to guarantee somehow he receives the item by mail. I think you can do that at the post office? I would be scared if for some crazy reason it didn't get to him, but at the same time, Im scared to go to his house. I know the best way would be to just drop it off at his place, then take off, but I just hope I don't run into him or he ends up being home after driving all that way. Oh well, I'll figure it out. Guess I just needed to vent here in order to do it. =) Thanks again everyone.

Thanks for your responses. It helped So, I guess I'll just mail him his pass, and just take his gift back. I don't want to show him I care. It's hard, because each day he hasn't called is a day that I dont get yelled at or hung up on.

Well, I stated in my last post that my ex emailed me after 4 days NC simply saying, "Hi, how are you. Hope you are ok. You know I still love you." I was a little confused by it, but I didn't read into it too much, and just responded with a simple answer of, "im good, hope you are well, luv u 2." I shouldn't have even responded, but I did. That was Sat morning, and since then, no call, text, or email. We've broke up before, but he always calls back a few days later, plays the blame game, then says he still loves me. I think this time he may think its for good in his mind. I hope he does, because Im thinking its over finally too. My question is, I have his parking pass, and his bday present from last week that I was never able to give him bc we go in a huge fight. I text him last thurs saying I was in his area and if he wanted me to stop by and drop them off. He texd back and said "no, hang on to them we will do it later." Well, its now been almost a week, and I still have his things. No big deal, but I honestly just want them to be gone, so he will not have an excuse to ever call back in the future, nor will I have any reminders of him. When we were fighting, he told me to keep my gift for him, shove the pass ******! I just don't want there to be anything "hanging" to open up contact again. I don't know what hes thinking, but I sure don't want to become weak again if he does call me, because right now I still am. Should I drop his stuff off with a note when he isn't home, or not worry about it, and if he calls, just ignore him?? I just want to move on, and thinking he may call or we may get together is only going to prolong the pain. His verbal abuse has wore me down, and I need to be strong again and move on.

Thanks everyone for your posts. I'm taking it day by day. My ex emailed me yesterday after not talking for 4 days after our huge fight, and he simply said, "Hi, how are you. Hope you are ok. You know I love you.." I just responded with, "im doing well, hope you are ok." That was it. That was yesterday morning, and he hasn't called or anything. Its easier when he doesn't call, because Im finally looking at it as officially over, even if in his mind he is still trying to play games and string me along. I have his birthday present still, and his parking pass, which in our previous fight he told me (see first post) to keep the gift and shove the pass up *****! those were his exact words, and yet I still wanted to give them back in person, so Thurs I text him saying that I was in his area if he wanted me to stop by and drop them off. he said hang on to them, we will do it later." I don't want to see him "later" anymore. The more time thats past, the more I realize that nc is the best thing. Even that little email he sent me brought up my emotions again. I just feel like leaving his stuff on his porch, telling him to leave me alone, then not talking to him for a long time. I don't know what his intentions are, whether he feels we are over too and just wanted to check on me or what. I just want to move on with my life without this verbally abusive man, even though I miss him and love him very much. Its hard because I am always thinking that he is already with another woman, but like you all said, he will treat her like crap eventually too IF she allows it, because he will never change. He is 34, and thats why he is still single! =)

I haven't talked to my ex in 4 days. It's been really tough, but we both got in a huge fight, and I think it may be over for good. He was really verbally abusive and called me names, and would hold grudges forever, even if I was truly sorry. I did give him reason sometimes to be upset, but I definatley didn't deserve some of the words and temper he would give me. My question is, how do you get over the idea and thought that they may, or will be in the future, with someone new, and she may be treat him so much better. He is an actor in los angeles, so he is constantly on sets with beautiful women, and even though he had a temper, it still really hurts me to think of this. I keep thinking, "will this woman be all that I wasn't?" Will she make him yell at her the way I did? I guess I just have to think that no matter who the woman is, he will verbally abuse her too given time. How do you get over that wrenching feeling of your ex being with someone else?

Thanks for the replies. I think that it may be over this time. He was enraged yesterday, and this isn't healthy for either of us. I just hope that this is the right thing to do, even though I still love him so much. Im just confused...

I have never done this before, he was my first love, so I hope that this feeling goes away soon, because I miss him, but not the verbal abuse and constant walking on eggshells.

Thats the thing. I do think of how he sees me in his eyes. Yes, I do do some annoying things, but I doubt that anything deserves to be reacted at the way he reacts to me. The other day, we got into an argument, and he didn't believe me, so he called me an idiot, a stupid kid, then called me a m**** f***r and hung up on me. It has gone to physical violence once, because he became so enraged over something that he thought had to do with another guy. Turns out I did nothing wrong, and he didn't really even act sorry after. We have broken up before, he says he is sick of the fights, etc, tells me I just annoy him, then he will call back, play the blame game, then tell me he misses me. He hasn't returned my call, or my email, so who knows if he is serious this time. I love him so much, and I know what I need to do, but God only knows why leaving a verbally abusive jerk like him is so hard. I guess Im just clinging to the good times we had, and not to the way he treats me every time something doesn't go the way he likes it to. He has anger problems deeper than me just annoying him, because in reality, no one has ever yelled at me the way he does.

Hi Everyone. Ive been with my bf for 2 years. I love him so much, but everything I do seems to bother him. I give him a little attitude when I have a bad day or something and he gives me silent treatment for hours, sometimes days because he says he is so sick of it. My "attitude" is mostly a reaction to a bad day, or bad situation, but never anything serious. when I apologize, he just says, "always an excuse with you, but you never change!" Ive put up with so much from him, but when he apologizes, I let it go. He does things I repeatedly tell him I don't like, but I don't yell at him for it. I love him regardless. Well, yesterday was his bday, he told me the day before he might have to work, but he didn't know yet. yesterday I didn't hear from him for a while, so I assumed he didn't have to work and we would have itfree. So I planned a big thing for his bday the next day, then I finally call him because he hadn't called me since that morning. He then told me he had to work. I acted bummed because I had something really special. I did give him a little attitude I will admit, but it was only because I was bummed I couldn't give him his surprise. So, we get off the phone, and since then he has not let what I did go. He won't even acknowledge the fact that I planned something for him and tried to make his bday special. No, all he did was yell, and he even told me to take what I got him, and any other things i had of his and shove it ***!! He literally said he was going to go home (he was at work on his bday) and sulk because I ruined his birthday! He just wouldn't let my attitude the night before go! This made me so sad, and since then, hes been so cruel and doesn't want to talk, so i just wrote him an email saying if he wants it over fine, I won't bother him. No response It just sucks, because I am always trying soo hard, and he never appreciates anything, just yells when I do something wrong. He never sees the good in me, calls me names, and is just plain cruel so many times. Why do I still miss him then. Its only been a day, and I miss him. I know I prob shouldn't stay with him, so what is the best way to just move on? Should I drop off his gift I got him, or just not bother with him?