maritalbliss86

3 minutes ago, Fudgie said:

I'm cynical and pessimistic. Always have been, always will be. I never really suspected it to serve me super well in life but I accepted myself. 

With the pandemic, it has been a real boon to me. I enjoy my life but have told my family for a number of years that I don't personally believe humanity is worth perpetuating. I think world peace is only possible if humans were gone. My mom came to me recently and told me that until the pandemic, she didn't agree with me but now she reconsiders her position. 

I suppose some people would ask "what good is a beautiful environment if no one is around to appreciate it?" I don't know but we as humans are so destructive and I don't see that changing ever. 

At the end of the day, I just want to relish the little time I have here. 

You're not religious right? You sound like God when he did the whole flood thing. People were so awful/evil he decided to start over and clear the world of them (except one family lol).

So our baby nephew passed away a few days ago.  My husband only found out indirectly through facebook.  I ironically never would have known about the baby if my husband hadn't kept accidentally finding things out.  Sometimes ignorance is bliss.  But I'm glad I was able to pray mercy over him😔 ❤️.

I saw the obituary... they cut him, me, and our children out of it when mentioning his uncles, aunts, and cousins (and they did mention the other ones by name).  

My husband is dealing with some anger.  I'll never understand his family.

The baby was still our nephew, and we know we'll see him again.  I suggested we hold our own ceremony together as a family for him.  Our oldest is aware enough that he is grieving the death of his baby cousin, and this is a kind way to honor it for everyone.

On 12/1/2021 at 8:17 AM, mylolita said:

Hey if we can persuade our husbands wanna be my neighbour in Alaska? I'll come split some fire wood for ya! Hahahahaha! 

that would be awesome LOL If only!!!!

3 hours ago, mylolita said:

What would be your ideal living situation Marital? Do you enjoy the idea of all sustainable electric hyper modernist flying car pod future?

I feel like I'm still figuring that out... 🤔 we're in a good position to launch into something completely different for our family, but deciding what that should be is very hard.

Alaska was actually one option believe it or not 🤣 but my husband won't do it

14 hours ago, Jibralta said:

You wouldn't believe what good friends the Democrats and Republicans actually are!

Oh no I believe it.  I'm not really either btw... parents were always independent and I tried each when younger.

I'm so sorry, Seraphim 😞 keeping you in my prayers.

21 hours ago, Jibralta said:

it's not the 'elites;' it's the lobbyists. They control our government. Have you ever seen the documentary Who Killed the Electric Car?

I haven't seen it, but I've heard about the things that documentary talks about.  Things have changed though since that time.  We are projected to transition over to being 50% electric by 2030 (huge).  

He just exposes a lot, or could, I don't believe it's solely lobbyists that he pisses off if you know what I mean.  https://www.healththoroughfare.com/news/elon-musk-exposes-the-united-nations-as-money-laundering-and-child-sex-trafficking-operation-with-just-one-tweet/39681

1 minute ago, dias said:

Lol I misunderstood 🙂

I thought your reply was pure sarcasm.  Was a beautiful response 🤣

https://www.businessinsider.com/tesla-wasnt-invited-to-white-house-electric-cars-summit-2021-8

Your reply was epic!!!!  

I guess I just can't figure him out.  On one hand you'd think he wouldn't care about things like this, but I think he actually does somewhat care (public opinion or elitist opinion, he even cares more about his employees than most people would in his situation.  I mean, this guy is fascinating). 

Maybe you don't know about this(?) but there was a huge event where *all* the electric car companies were invited to discuss the future of electric cars... except for his.  He makes 74% of electric cars (correction: in US), the elites behind the scenes wanted him forced out of this.  It wasn't just about unions, which they conveniently blamed it on.  It's because they can't control him and he's too unpredictable.

OMG Dias!!!!!  LOL

On 11/23/2021 at 11:34 AM, dias said:

What does that mean? 

 

Had to think before answering you....  In general, he's not really accepted (yet), and I'm not sure he ever will be, into the elitist circle.  There are a lot of reasons for that or behind that, but the main one is probably because he's an independent thinker that can't be controlled very well (plus he uses Twitter like Trump... which has it's benefits, but is also very unpredictable/uncontrollable).  If he ever changes that, I think they'd welcome him in, but he doesn't seem to be able to.  And I'm not sure it's necessarily idealism that he holds so strongly to (I just don't know only those closest to him would) or if it's because of a personality issue he has.

I admire him a lot, don't get me wrong!  I think he's a genius and amazing, but everyone has blind spots and he's said things before that lead me to think he himself doesn't quite understand *why* they don't accept him (ie- do passive aggressive things like purposefully leave him out of something he logically should have been included in).  But of course, I could be wrong 🤷‍♂️

On 11/25/2021 at 5:24 PM, mylolita said:

Ohhh right colour for the tresses as well HA! “Stubborn to a fault” this is d**n true I can’t deny! Oh Lord, this is sounding right! Pig headed is how I would’ve said it but stubborn will do 😘

 

I will have to take the test 😉 I hope it is a rare and special personality, obviously… LOL! 

 

What did you think about your result Marital? Did you think it was accurate? I quickly glanced at some of the qualities it seems very much like how I imagine you ☺️
 

Lo x

Yes, for something so childish (LOL) it was actually pretty accurate!  But thank God I've matured in many ways.  I used to be even worse 😞 

On 11/25/2021 at 6:27 PM, mylolita said:

We have moved to a town founded by a Quaker! They were and are a pretty awesome branch of Christianity! Don’t hold much against them at all, very peaceful 😘

 

This is coming from your friend, the big fat atheist 😉   
 

I heard a Quaker wedding is very sweet x

Aw that is sweet!  We have at least one Quaker in our ancestors (that my mom found when searching)... and we just went over them a few weeks ago for a history class with the kids 🙂.  Such interesting people....

Your town sounds so nice, and I'm so happy for you ❤️!

Love that Thanksgiving is this week!  Everything is already prepped to go, so excited 😁 ... I love holidays!!!

I was thinking about this gratitude journal... we have so much to be thankful for here, even with so many problems and horrific things going on right now.  

Homeschooling has been amazing this year, especially considering the rough start!  Our oldest is getting more and more comfortable with building and manipulating things I don't understand (LOL crap!), he's even referring to himself as an engineer 😮 😬 we'll see what his future holds... he still loves space and keeps up with Elon Musk's ventures - that man never stops!

And on that... um... he's angering the elite.  I'm sure he knows that, but it's dangerous.  Eventually he's going to have to decide if he'll cater, or hold to his ideals.

4 hours ago, Fudgie said:

It's fascinating how our families of origin influence our outlook of relationships. 

I grew up well-off, parents fought often over many things but not money, lots of resentment on both sides, just emotional stuff, past trauma, etc. You could feel the tension. I never saw them kiss or hug unless it was an anniversary. I was my father's crutch, his confidante, and this was inappropriate and messed me up deeply. My parents relationship is a lot better now, they are still together, but I will forever have the scars. 

I saw how my parents treated each other, I saw my dad refuse to contribute to household chores despite both of my parents pulling 60-80 hr weeks in high paying, intense careers. I hated how he did that. Money was never an issue but everything else was. 

I have a very negative personal opinion of marriage that is now leaking into my opinion of relationships, I was sterilized in my mid 20s, I won't be a parental figure because I can't trust that I won't repeat the same toxic patterns, and I poured myself into other pursuits, assuming that I would be "on my own" for the most part and I wanted to make a lot of money on my own (now I do). 

I've been in therapy for a long time and worked on myself a lot. I've accepted, "this is as good as it gets". I can't get rid of my personal lifelong revulsion toward marriage and other things and at this point, I'm okay with that. 

My grandmother grew up with a poor dad with many debts. It's feast or famine in my family, either you're rich or you're struggling. Money was scarce for her, she married very well, but the pattern of mental illness and bad dynamics continued. 

The only person who understands me in this regard is my cousin, who grew up in the same family, grew up wealthy, parallel to me, and also has a strong revulsion to marriage and children, no partners. 

The family tree ends here.

I had a similar experience, but of course different in many ways.  

I love my parents, but they had/have a messed up relationship.  A lot of that went into what I decided to do as far as choosing a different kind of spouse for myself (even though I love my dad and still get along really well with him).  My husband is opposite of my dad in the ways I felt like my dad failed, but then the same as him in the ways where I felt my dad succeeded.  That was on purpose though.  I knew what I wanted at 20 years old somehow.

There are many things both of them did that as a child, I swore I would never do.  I think that's normal... I think it's called something along the lines of, "vows one makes as a child," from the things they see that they just *know* deep down aren't right.  Sometimes they can be a little off, logically, and need tweaking when they're more mature in adulthood, but most times those, "vows," a child makes are actually valid, good decisions.

As a side note... when we didn't have any money we still NEVER fought over money.  So I understand the money argument, it definitely makes things easier, but fighting can happen over literally anything, especially if one or both of the partners just have a difficult personality/bad character.

3 hours ago, Seraphim said:

I am beginning to think this move was some seriously bad mojo. 

I tried to get caught up reading your journal as to what all has happened 😞 I'm so sorry, Seraphim.  I do hope it gets better 🙏

46 minutes ago, waffle said:

You're overthinking.  It really is very simple.

Try the experiment I mentioned and report the results back to us.

Hard pass!  LOL

18 minutes ago, waffle said:

The point is that it's your attractiveness that matters.  That's it.  If it was your job/income/success that mattered, then you'd be posting that on dating sites instead of pictures.  I'm not saying it should be that way or it shouldn't be that way, I'm saying it IS that way.

Yes, but don't you think it is more nuanced than that in real life though?  If a bikini picture is her profile picture (!!) normal, high-ranking men will probably steer clear.  Because that one decision she made just screams drama and high-maintenance (and like Batya said, "low emotional intelligence," in that she couldn't see how she'd come across).  Or the higher ranking men will most likely only want to use her and move on when they finally marry.

Men want a lady in the street and you know what in bed 😉 usually....

I think I found Lo's, too LOL  (Mylolita)

I love this.  Not sure I agree with the Myers Briggs personality test, but it seems mostly correct 👍

On 11/19/2021 at 7:18 PM, Fudgie said:

I was always more of a bookworm.

yes... I've always identified more with Bell from Beauty and the Beast.  But ironically, especially in my early 20's, people thought I looked too pretty/hot to be smart LOL  Very interesting experiment

On 11/19/2021 at 5:40 PM, Batya33 said:

It's silly to do what you suggested -for a man or woman -on a dating profile -in fact it shows the person lacks common sense and emotional intelligence.

Right... I agree with A LOT that this other side is presenting (not just Waffle, but others, too 🙂).  But um... maybe having a selection of pictures that are more normal... and throw in one bikini one at the end or something LOL  .... make them drool 🙂 

On 10/16/2019 at 10:00 AM, firelily said:

How do you feel as advice givers on this forum, if this is apparently the impression of so many forum users? 😞

 

It surprised me, too, when I've seen there are mostly negative reviews.  But it shouldn't have surprised me 🙂 most people forget to, "thank," or do a positive gesture back toward something in real life, let alone an anonymous place online (that doesn't feel real to them I'm guessing?).

Reminds me of the ancient story of Jesus healing 10 people from leprosy... something that made them not even able to live with their families, work, do life, but have to live as ostracized and hated, "things," and creatures.  He healed all of them... but only one went back to actually thank him.

And that's why.  It's rare.