TWISM

I guess I dont understand, she left me. Am I just supposed to drop everything in my life and just take her back?

I would say light contact is best. For me when they both are calling and asking what is up its hard for me. I know that its hard on both of them, I know this but I cant be pressured into being with someone thats unfair to everyone.

She is about 5'6" 120 lbs.. does she sound like your type? Are you getting at somethign with your post?

To bring a different POV I am "that" guy. I have two women in my life. For the past few months it has been the new girl. Now its my ex-wife wanting me back. (she left me) Trust me when I say this is one of the hardest things I have ever had to go through, but its not about the two women its about what I want, what inside me makes me smile. Its not that there is anything wrong with either of them, but the girls make it to be that somethign is wrong with them or I am picking them. I can tell you this if he thinks it out and makes the right decsion then the girl he ends up with should have a very dedicated man. I might be in a different situation since my ex-wife and I were together for 7 years and married for almost 3 of those years. So i had a lot of feelings surface when she came back into my world.

I dont think I clarified this point but we are divorced. The papers were signed and filed. Thanks for the advice I need to take some time to see how things play out. I dont want to keep them both waiting for me to make a choice so one needs to be made in a short amount of time. Thanks Again!

On March 22nd of this year my wife left me. She has very good reasons too. I wasnt the man to her I needed to be. I was too involved with friends and myself to make her feel like she was loved. I have a sarcastic humor that is sometimes hurtful to the people I care about. I used this humor too much with my wife and it ended up just tearing her down as a person. We were married for almost 3 years but together almost 7. Of course I beg and pleaded that all I needed was a 2nd chance to make thigns right. She has said we need to see someone together about our issues and I just was too stubborn to go. So of course when D-Day came she wasnt about to hear me say I would go now. I had already been giving my 2nd chance but just didnt do anythign with it. She moved on and really moved fast moved in with another guy about 1 month later. I sought help, when my wife left she said no chance in us getting back together... It didnt matter it was time for me to take control I have been in with my thearpist for 6 months. She is very impressed with my progress, its leaps and bounds better. I really learned a lot about myself. And why I did some of the things I did. I went through a rough childhood, alocholich parents, drug usages by parents, abuse, and molesting. A lot of things that is hard for a person when just one happens but all of them can really mess with your head when you get older. In the mean time I met a new girl, who is very wonderful. I know first mistake getting together with a new girl so soon. It was about 2 months after the split up, divorce papers were filed, etc... I decided to be the person that every girl deserves and the person I need to be. Needless to say my new relationship has been awesome. The girl thinks the world of me and has never dated anyone like me. Things I didnt do before, I am doing now. Roses, cards, poems, etc... all things that girls really just melt over. I am also much more aware of her needs/emotions. What she needs to hear, feel, etc... Fast forward to today... my ex wife wants to work things out. She said she hasnt been happy since she left and that she wants to seek help together to make it work. I had been in contact with her on and off througout this whole divorce and when I would talk to her on the phone Iwould "brag" about how things were going. I later have found that she would go home and just cry because she wondered why she never was treated like a princess why she wasnt loved, why I was being the man she knew I could be with another woman. She just assumed that I never loved her. Basically I have fixed what was wrong but now I am faced with a hard decision. Do I work on it with my ex or do I continue down this new road with my current girlfriend? Both of the girls treat me very very well. They both always have, its just with the ex I didnt treat her like she should have been treated, but she has seen that change and wants to be with me again. The only real difference between the two is the ex is quite and reserved and the new girl is way more outgoing, but she is also needy. needy in the way that soem times rubs me the wrong way. Always needing to her she is loved etc... My friends say they can see this and see that I get frustrated at times... I know this is a lot of information and am not looking for any answers just some insight. I feel like I have a chance to right my wrong in my marriage. A chance to show her how she should be loved. My current "girlfriend" lives about 4 hours away and my ex is now living one block away from me. So the distance could play a big part.