Glen1987
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Everything posted by Glen1987
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Did you say that to her? Or did she just assume?
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Just to add to what I've said, I do still want her back. But as many people say, it's got to come from her. She said she didn't want to talk to me if its gonna bring feelings back - so that's quite clear she's not looking for reconciliation.
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Thanks man. I actually don't really feel that much today. I think I was kinda blasé and nice enough at the same time to her. Last time she initiated contact I was thinking "This is it, she wants me back", but today I don't think that. I still don't know why she reached out. It's not going to make me break my own rules on initiating contact. I know I still have feelings for her, so I won't let myself do it.
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She then wrote back half an hour later asking to be friends. I have no idea what the motivation is here. I told her I still cared about her. She then said she didn't want to bring up old feelings. I said as far as friendship is concerned, I just want her to be happy and that I wish her well. We then had some small talk about how we're doing and that was it. It's so hard not to analyse it. Last time I spoke to her, she was short with me. I was the same today and then it obviously affected her so she wrote back about being friends. We're not talking about a manipulative, childish girl here. She's very switched on. She probably just wanted to know if I was mad at her or something. Maybe guilt for the way it was after we finished. I'm sure 90% on here will say I shouldn't have wrotten back after the first text. If I refused friendship, that obviously shows her how much I'm still affected.
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A few hours ago as I was reading this thread my ex text me asking how the bag she got me for Xmas is holding up. Is said its doing good and left it at that. Just had to go and do a quick 15 minute work out, my heart is jumping all over the place. She replied saying she's glad. I won't reply, even though I want to...thoughts?
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I know how you're feeling. My ex is also very stubborn and I really want her to notice how much better I look now after training for a marathon and going to the gym lots, but I just hope she'll look at my Facebook page once in a while and see, probably wishful thinking, not that she was ever asking me to lose weight - but it's always something I said I'd do and never did when I was with her. I think people do reach out, if they know deep down it's what they want. Even the most stubborn people.
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Why do you need to ask her to tell you that though? If she was happier with you in her life, she'd contact you. That's just my opinion. If you give yourself deadlines to contact her, you're just going to be disappointed.
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Getting back together really does happen!
Glen1987 replied to wishingonastar's topic in Getting Back Together
how did he come back into your life? Was it planned or by chance? -
I've started sleeping better now, at the start I was waking up ever 3/4 hours, now I can get about 7 hours usually. Been woken up a couple of times with the dream of her telling me she got back with her ex, or that she started seeing someone immediately after we broke up. Both of which Im pretty sure wouldn't happen, but it's enough to shock me into waking up.
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There is no way I'd contact her now, just the thought of doing so makes me panic and feel anxious. I always wondered about those guides and if they were legit or just a scam. It's funny that before I met her I was totally happy being single and could even envisage myself never settling down with anyone! Now though I can't wait to meet someone new and feel all those wonderful feelings you feel when you're falling in love with someone. I guess we have that to look forward to when we're healed.
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Thanks brokenhart. I've been through all sorts of emotions since the break up, which was 7 weeks ago. At first we remained friends as the break up was mutual, then I tried to get her bakc through sending flowers and saying it could be different, then I hit a really bad patch and missed work and kept looking at her social media, then I read those get your ex back guides which gave me false hope. The last straw was when I text her 9 days ago and she replied once and that was it. I just thought why am I putting myself through this? Doing nothing and staying NC is better than this pain. Sadly it took me over a month to figure that out. I don't think it can be helped, it's instinctive to fight for things isn't it? Anyway, onwards...
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Day 9: After a slightly better feeling yesterday, I'm back to feeling low today. I miss the security of having her, I know that's not a good reason for being with someone, but I was so comfortable and settled. I know it's cliche but it does feel like I'll never meet someone.
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I've started talking to another girl, only texting but I feel better for it. Also, I was looking at photos of me and my ex earlier and i don't actually find her that attractive in pictures when we're together towards the end of the relationship, but when I look at pictures from the start of the relationship and when I looked at new photos of her, I find her attractive. Thats weird isn't it?
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Post here instead of contacting your ex!
Glen1987 replied to Nynnja's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
Hey. I don't know why, but my mind always wonders if you're thinking of me. I'm not going to contact you anymore now, I know we ended amicably and I thought it'd be easy to stay friends but it's not that easy. I can't handle not having all of you. I don't think you ever didn't respond to any message I ever sent you, even if it was something small, you'd always reply last, I liked that. Now it's not like that, and why should it be because I'm not your boyfriend anymore. But I can't handle just being that. So I can't stay in touch anymore. Part of me thinks you think of me fondly, and miss me, but the other part of me thinks that you probably still hold some resentment, and are having a great time being single and being able to hang out with your work friends, it certainly seems that way. I'm sure all those lads who were texting you when we met are back on the scene, and you're just enjoying the attention. I really really hope that one day soon you remember just what we had. Why is it affecting me so much and not you? I wanted to end things with you. We should have been looking forward to a long summer together now, and moving in together soon - but just because of a bad patch, those dreams are all gone. Why aren't you bothered? Why aren't you fighting for that. You wanted it just as much as I did. I miss you so much xxx -
I love reading stuff like this, well done you. I am off work this week and so I suppose I'm thinking about her more during the day as we'd probably have spent this week together. I still really really want her back more than anything, but it has to be NC for me now. I've bought books on how to get over a break up etc to read this week. I just hope I feel better soon.
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That's the biggest mistake you can do man. I was doing ok last week, then I saw some pictures of my ex on the weekend and went backwards. I haven't looked at her page now for 4 days, and I feel better for it. I hate to admit I texted her last night. Just a quick back and forth about something trivial. I felt I needed to do it because the last time we spoke I was quite short with her and that's not like me. NC is good, but I'd never ignore someone who texted me, or be short with them just "coz that's what you're meant to do", I just thought even if I never speak to you again, I want the last thing we said to each other to be something normal, no games, just me being myself. And that's it. Do I think she'll get back in touch with me now? No I doubt it, our texts ended last night, she could have continued it if she was interested. Maybe in a few months, but I accept that it's in the past now. It's been 5 weeks since the break up. So back to day 0!
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Good thread! I'm on day 17. I had got to about 2 weeks previously but then she messaged me and like an idiot I replied. To be honest I felt great after and thought maybe it was a sign that she was thinking of me romantically, but sadly I've not heard from her since. I didn't really engage in the text message conversation though, maybe that's why. Anyway, it still hurts like hell.