Hi there,
Well I think i have a problem and my problem is.. i dont think i have a problem! Or in more articulate words, basically i love my boyfriend but i treat him like crud cuz he was horrid to me (like a real harsh to me) i wont go into details cuz that would make it long post but yeah, he made me feel like s*** when i really liked him, he fooled around, had his fun, and then after he had slept with a load of ppl, been a d*** to me etc, then he decided to like me... then love me. I'm glad he did fall for me, of course i am, but i get these moments where i feel so... self righteous. Like i am right and he is wrong because he was like this to me before we got together. If he does something i dont like, i bring up the way he was to me but it usually doesnt help. I get these moments of anger A LOT, like at bad times maybe twice a day, if im having a good patch then not for a couple days but then something, anything, like a song or advert on tv triggers the memory of how he made me feel so sad, worthless ect. He swears he never did it directly at me, but because of this problem (??) i have my mind simply refuses to believe him. I feel like a part of me hates him and always will, for treating me badly and for the madness i feel when thinking of the other girls he went with. And also, when we have bad arguments, or when i get one of these 'moments' i tell him its over. I know it hurts him but in these times i feel like i dont care, even though i love him and do really care for him A LOT. And if he rings me and says 'i love you dont leve me' then i often reply 'well you should have loved me sooner.' and i truly believe that i'm right. He says i'm the most beautiful girl in the world, but if so then why did he ignore me/ even be an idiot to me and instead screw some of the ugliest ho's in the school?
See, i made it all long. I'm sorry. If anyone bothered reading al that then, ANY IDEAS on how to help this would be really great, i love me boy!!