WithLove
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Everything posted by WithLove
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I would play it cool. I would tell him to have fun. I would lead by example. When you don't freak over it, he should realize that he shouldn't, either.
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Could you guys type it out, too? Videos come up as "page cannot be displayed". I would very much appreciate it, if you think of it!
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I'm obsessed by this song called "Besame Mucho". It's a bolero. It's simple, but elegant and, well, sexy. It's in Spanish, but I can't stop listening to it.
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It's annoying me that it's 4 pm, not 5 pm, which is the time when I'd be getting the you-know-what out of here.
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Perhaps this is the type of relationship that works for you, though. One where you or he travels often and you don't spend tons of time together. That makes the times you do see each other more special.
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No cassette tapes, then?
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^ Hahaha! That's awful!
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Wow, what the heck? reblock and ignore!
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When I leave for lunch and come back to find out my parking space was taken at work. Stop complaining about us using your side of the lot if you are going to keep taking the spots usually designated for us.
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Checking in to see how you're doing. ((((((Hugs)))))
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Sending hugs your way, Reinvent. You're just too independent for someone like S. There's nothing wrong with it. You tried very hard to compromise, like he tried compromising for you. But sometimes it just doesn't work out. Let us know how you're doing when you feel comfortable enough to do so.
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Happy Mother's Day, D!
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What stressors have you been dealing with? The last time I checked in with you, S seemed to get irrationally jealous and possessive with you. Are these traits still a problem? (I feel bad because I haven't been keeping up to date with everyone's journals. I used to be on here all day back when I worked, but after getting fired, I log into tapatalk and it's harder to follow things. Trying to check in with my fellow journal-ers!)
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Because - being with someone not meant for you is better than being alone.
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"I have learned to view things like this as a symptom of bigger problem. On the outside the jealousy is a symptom of something larger he needs to address." To me, it means - ultimately, he'll never fully trust you, or worse, he doesn't trust anyone else around you. Either way, you're going to get stifled. Ugh. This sucks, Reinvent.
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I don't really think this is something he can change. He may cover it up, tell you he isn't bothered... but he'll internalize it and eventually burst.
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Well I know what I'd be having for dinner!!
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How's it going, Reinvent
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Thinking Valentine's Day is stupid only when you're not in a relationship. Wishing I had one.
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Glad to see he is understanding your needs and being receptive to them. It's also important that you're able to recognize past patterns and are working to break them. It's a pretty good feeling, right?
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The way your heart is not to pull you closer to his.
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He is the one that wants to spend more time with you? Spending every weekend with each other can be exhausting. What about overnights during the week? Is that a possibility? And do overnights on 2 weekends a month? There's got to be a way to compromise. You seem like you're feeling a little suffocated.
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Maybe you're having too many 3 day weekends. Maybe seeing each other once or twice a week instead would be better for you.
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Thing is.... when you're with someone where you're constantly afraid of acting like their ex acted.... you eventually start losing yourself in your conscious attempts to act the opposite of her. I did that with C. It was awful. I knew how much resentment he had for his ex, so I became obsessed with being the opposite of her. And it just exhausted me. I don't think this is boding well for you, Reinvent. At only 3 months in... maybe it's a good thing that this happened now. I know he says he wants to learn from this and hear what you're saying... but how much of this is him learning how to make fighting rules, and how much of it is him still recovering from his past relationship?
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Ugh. I don't know. I tried coming up with a lot of different explanations for you and him.... but I keep coming back to - he is still feeling the burrs stuck from his last relationship. And without meaning to, he's making you pay for the pain they give him. Everytime you say something that reminds him of his ex, he's going to get defensive. That's how he used to react to his ex. It's not your fault. But I think no matter what happens, you'll be constantly fearing reminding him of how his ex was. And I've dealt with that before. It's exhausting.