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Thread: Questioning this ldr

  1. #1

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    Questioning this ldr

    I've been in this long distance relationship for almost 2 years and at the beginning, it was pretty great. This past 6 ish months, I feel like the relationship is slowing down to a point where I'm questioning what to do.

    We're not really intimate anymore, and I don't know if I want to be. I love her but I feel like I'm not in love with her. There are days where I just want to end it and days where I really enjoy it.

    Around 6 ish months ago, I bought plane tickets to go see her in September, so not long now. But about a week ago, a girl at work caught my eye, and we've been stealing glances ever since. I feel this overwhelming connection to her and I know it's probably just me compensating for what's missing in my relationship but I just can't stop thinking about this other girl. We haven't really talked and I don't know for sure if the feeling is mutual but this crush has made me question whether I should go in a few weeks to see my gf to see if the spark comes back to the relationship or cancel the plane tickets and end it now? I don't know whether I should work on the relationship or just let it go.

    Thanks for reading, any advice would be appreciated as it's been making me go absolutely insane >_<

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    These two statements often go hand in hand. It may be time to admit a LDR is not for you.
    Originally Posted by xMojoPin
    I love her but I feel like I'm not in love with her<<<<<<<<<a week ago, a girl at work caught my eye

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    I'd slow down if I were you. If you're going to breakup with the LDR woman, see her in September and at least give her the common courtesy and common decency of breaking up with her in person. Don't break up with her via text or with a phone chat which is uncouth and too cold. At least be decent enough to break the bad and sad news to her in person.

    As for the co-worker woman, just keep in mind should your relationship with her flounder or fail, you still have to see her everyday, every week and earn your paycheck. Think how awkward it will be at the workplace should your relationship with her goes south. Just keep in mind that your consequences could be harsh if your relationship doesn't pan out the way you had originally envisioned. This is why workplace relationships can be dicey. Do so at your own risk.

  4. #4
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    You have been in a LDR for almost two years. I cannot imagine how difficult that is. I am only 5 months into mine and it is almost unbearable.

    Anyway given the length of the LDR, you really owe it to your partner to at least wait until you see her again in September before you make any decisions. Two years is a long time, it would be rather cowardly and ungentlemanly to just end it on a phone call or whatever.

    Obviously stay away from your co-worker until you have broken up with your girlfriend. That would be cheating, LDR or not.

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  6. #5

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    Thanks for the replies guys. My visit is gonna last around 3 weeks, so do I talk to her at the beginning or near the end of the trip? It would feel so weird and fake to go on like everything's okay and then drop the bombshell near the end of the 3 weeks.


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