Husband does not get on with mother

My husband will not get on with my mother and refuses to go for visits and Sunday lunch. I sort of understand why because she did not agree with us being together however she accepted it and even paid for our wedding. My husband holds grudges for a very long time as does his mother.

Mum invited us all for Sunday lunch but husband said he could not say what time he would finish work so could not go. I knew this was an excuse so I decided to take my son and have Sunday lunch but did not tell husband. When he came home early I hasten to add and realised I was making Sunday lunch for him only he spat his dummy out and hasn't spoken to me since. I knew this would be how he would react and normally I would have said we can't go to mums but I now realised he won't change so I decided to go as it is not fair on my mum to keep saying no to her invitations just to please him.

I feel I need to make a stand for once and face the arguments head on but I am very stressed about it too

It's one thing for him to not want to go, and another to not allow you to go. The first is his choice, the second is controlling. He may not like your mum, but he shouldn't be stopping you from spending time with her.

You are in a tough situation. It's hard when two people you love don't get along with each other. However, as they are both part of your life, you will need to find some kind of common ground.

In this case space is a good thing. you may be used to your traditions and being very close knit but don't force others to be that way and make invitations seem like subpoenas.

Most people would hate being forced to go to the in laws every single weekend. Go yourself enjoy the time apart from him and with your family.

My husband will not get on with my mother and refuses to go for visits and Sunday lunch. I knew this was an excuse so I decided to take my son and have Sunday lunch but did not tell husband.