How To Get Your Lover Back

That's the title of this great book I'm currently reading.

"How to get your lover back" by Blase Harris MD

I was wandering the aisles of Barnes and Nobles - and somehow ended up in the "relationships" section - shelves of books on relationship issues (which also happen to be next to books on sex and intimacy with provocative and distracting covers which remind me of things me and my ex used to do..... damnit....).

Anyway, saw this book, really liked the title, and took it to the cafe to flip through. The first few pages really connected with me, and I decided to buy it. I'm only about a third of the way through it, and I gotta say, it has REALLY mellowed me out. It makes you focus on whether or not you really want to get back with your ex, where the problems might have been.. and then the author focuses in on how to identify destructive emotions inside you regarding the relationship and the need/importance to stop them.

Author also runs down some common mistakes dumpees make when trying to reconcile, and illustrates them with mini examples. So far it's been a good read, helped me calm down somewhat, and whether or not it helps me get my ex back remains to be seen, but it's definitely giving me more peace of mind. As I read more into it, I will try to update this thread.

PS. uh ohhhh.. my ex just signed into skype... well we're going on 6 months NC in a day or two.... should I just send a quick hello?... or just let it sit? Right now I'm opting to not do anything... she'll message me when she's ready. No pressure from me.

im going to check it out thanks

Lol, you read the book... you tell us what you should do with the skype situation. I wouldnt contact, the most effort i would do is put an away message that invites conversation, but that doesnt look forced. If you are healed, i would contact on some friendly-terms.

Reading those books did help me a lot with my healing. It gave me the closure she couldnt give me.

I'll def look into it. Thanks