Need help with reconnecting with former lover/weight gain while in current relationship

I've been with my current guy for 15 years, but for the past 5 years it's been a long distance relationship. It seems as though I'm the one who makes all the effort by traveling to visit him several times a year but he doesn't make any effort to visit me. Anyway, for the past 6-7 years, intimacy has been few and far between and I feel very emotionally neglected and when I try to talk to him about it he changes the subject but we talk by phone several times every day but never about our relationship. In the meantime I lost both my parents and he wasn't there for me emotionally or physically but I just couldn't bring myself to break up with him because I couldn't bear another loss. Anyway, due to some medical problems I had, coupled with the lack of support from him, I gained A LOT of weight over the years. Food was my comfort. So over the past several months I've begun to look at our relationship as a friendship now rather than a romantic relationship and now that I accept that, I no longer turn to food for comfort.

So, recently I've been contacted by a former boyfriend (which would also be a long distance relationship if we continued things). In fact, I broke it off with him after I started seeing my current guy because of the long distance. So, this former guy wants to see me and invited me to join him in Montreal next month for a week and I accepted and we're talking about seeing each other again after that. He's already making arrangements to visit me and I him. Unfortunately I feel guilty about the excess weight I've gained and feel I should mention it to him prior to seeing each other but I hope it would not change things between us because since I've accepted my current situation with my current guy, and my medical issues are under control, I am now losing weight.

How do I mention this weight issue to him before we see each other and still keep him interested in me? Because I know I never should have ended things with him in the first place. Even with the long distance relationship we had, things with him were better with him than with my current 15 year relationship.

And you're going to do all of this while still in a relationship?

I believe she mentioned she broke things off with her ex of 15 years due to the distance.

Honestly, why not just let your current guy know that in the past few years, you have gained a bit of weight. He may not even think anything of it. 15 year is a long time, for all you know he looks a whole lot different too. Hey may have gained a lot of weight, went bald for all you know.

Don't be so quick to put yourself down, because we all age, and we all change. If he truly likes you for you, he'll accept you just the way you are.

Hope you have fun @ Montreal.

I believe she mentioned she broke things off with her ex of 15 years due to the distance.

I didn't read that in the original post. What I read was that she was still with the boyfriend of 15 years:

Anyway, for the past 6-7 years, intimacy has been few and far between and I feel very emotionally neglected and when I try to talk to him about it he changes the subject but we talk by phone several times every day but never about our relationship. In the meantime I lost both my parents and he wasn't there for me emotionally or physically but I just couldn't bring myself to break up with him because I couldn't bear another loss.

^ Perhaps you're right. I re-read the thread, and it does seem as though she is still with her current partner.

OP, if you are in fact with your partner, perhaps it's a better idea to break things off with him first before pursuing your ex bf?

I agree with the others; you should break up with your current bf before finding a replacement. Relationships (including long distance ones) don't operate on a "suck it and see" basis, where you can try out a new guy before deciding whether or not to end it with your current guy. Don't give into that temptation, because you'll end up feeling guilty about that, and it will kill any chance of happiness.

How much excess weight are we talking about? How about trying to reduce it in a rigorous way, using the meeting with the new guy as excellent motivation? Perhaps even put off the meeting until you feel in better shape, or more comfortable with yourself.