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karvala last won the day on October 23 2010

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About karvala

  • Birthday 12/16/1972

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  1. All folks, feel free to post here limericks profound and absurd, entirely at your leisure, to prove your total lack of poetic skills. ----------------------------- I will get the ball rolling The rebellious poet from inner Tyv, Had a written style most definitive, A propensity though, Which often he'd show, To jolly well split the infinitive! It get can only get better from here.
  2. Very impressive. It really emphasises the horse's personality.
  3. I think it's possible to truly forgive, certainly. To truly forget, however, I'm not so sure about, which means to fully trust again afterwards will inevitably be a long way down the road, if attainable at all.
  4. Her "impending" marriage was actually about two years ago.
  5. I don't think I would cheat either, but if I did, I think I would almost certainly tell, not least because I hate keeping any secrets from my gf, and even more I hate being a hypocrite and knowing how I would want her to tell me, I don't think I could square it with my conscience to keep quiet about it.
  6. He wants the best of both worlds, and it's not surprising since for a good few months now, that's what you've been giving him. He wants time and space, and more pertinently a regular ego trip at your expense with his constant walking away, but at the same time he wants you to stick around so that he can continue this gratification. It's sickening to see, and it's sickening that you're still letting him do it. Let's be clear about one thing: he has been, and he is continuing to be, emotionally abusive towards you. But you've been enabling this behaviour of his, and you have to stop, so that he forced to take a more reasonable approach. If he wants a relationship with you, it's got to be a real, non-abusive one. To be honest, I don't think he wants that, or indeed is capable of that, but if you're not yet convinced and ready to walk away, then lay it on the line and test it for yourself. If you're going to talk to him again, and note that this isn't a recommendation from me that you should, then you should make it quite clear what is and isn't acceptable for you (and his being emotionally unavailable and completely indifferent to your feelings should be clearly not acceptable), and that if he isn't capable of delivering this all the time, then you would like not to hear from him ever again, and he won't hear from you ever again. If he is capable of delivering this, it's time for him to step up to the plate and start doing it. If you let him abuse you, he will. He's shown that. Either ditch him, or bring him permanently into line. Don't let him talk his way back into your life, and then continue with the pattern of abuse that's happened until now. Finally, don't meet him unless there is a possibility that you want him to continue in your life. A meeting without that possibility would be an exercise in pointless pain, and likely to result in a continuation of the situation that's existed so far, which is good for him, but bad for you.
  7. I'm so sorry it has come to this, though I think in your heart you've known for a long time that it's been coming, with the way he's acted towards you. I know you must be in unbearable pain right now, and there's nothing that can really change that at the moment. The only thing I can say is to confirm your opinion that you are *not* the guilty one in any way, shape or form. At the end, you did absolutely the right thing not to pick up again after he'd been abusive and then hung up. He chose to end it that way, not you, and there's nothing you could have done to change things. Really, you have nothing to reproach yourself for. He's just trying to blame you for his consistently poor conduct. Over time, he will realise that you were much better to him than he was to you, and that his loss eventually will be much greater than yours, though it won't feel like that now to you, I know.
  8. Firstly, you should ask yourself if you're really in as bad shape now as you were at the time of the breakup; in particular, how did you feel just before you saw her on the street, and (presumably) hadn't had any contact with her for a while? As bad as after it? If not, then you are healing, just painfully slowly. If you want practical options to help deal it, check out the thread in my sig, which has a number of possible suggestions to try before heading for the inpatient clinic.
  9. Very good. I hope you've found that someone, and if you have, hold onto it and prize it like nothing else. If you haven't, I hope that you will.
  10. Superb. An indictment on the hypocrisy of violence and intolerance in the name of religion, presumably, and a masterful piece of writing. Very impressive!
  11. Heartbreaking. I'm sorry that you ever have to go through such pain, but you have done enormously well to embrace and accept the experience as you have here, to recognise it as a profound thing. I sincerely hope you get your wish upon a star.
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