Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 46

Thread: 'Getting a blowjob is not cheating'

  1. #21

    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    3,455
    Maybe because it's degrading to the woman who is performing oral sex, or she is just being used for sexual gratification with what is being done without any real emotional connection that may be characteristic to normal sexual intercourse. Now, if he had feelings for her, and was dating her or something or was his second romantic interest, then that would be cheating in contrast.

    In a similar way, some people won't see going to a prostitute as cheating because there is no emotional connection and you are just using another person for sex without any other type of involvement (as long as the SO's money is not being used of course).

    This is why it's important to get a person's moral values and views on subjects like that before getting into a relationship so there are no surprizes.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    3,550
    Originally Posted by velvette
    actually. in our relationship we try not to get upset at each other, no matter the topic. so we are both free to bring up silly things like that. and I would be absolutely OK with him getting a lapdance/professional sex (disease free, of course) if he wanted it. I've expressed this, and he knows it.

    he declines because he's not interested, but if one day he ever is... I'm potentially up for threesomes and letting him have fun with professional blowjobs etc. as long as he can separate the physical from the mental attachment, I don't see a problem.

    not for everyone of course, which is why cheating is different for every relationship! and people must talk to their partner to find out what is and isn't acceptable.
    .
    This is a very rare viewpoint. Of course it is up to the couple to decide what the definition of cheating is, but I would be quite upset if he thought that a BJ wasn't cheating. I'd be even more upset if he wanted to obtain one from another woman. I think it can be safely assumed that most women would not be okay with their boyfriends/husbands doing that.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member Lionel Hutz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    CrownTown Los Angeles
    Posts
    1,758
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by velvette
    actually. in our relationship we try not to get upset at each other, no matter the topic. so we are both free to bring up silly things like that. and I would be absolutely OK with him getting a lapdance/professional sex (disease free, of course) if he wanted it. I've expressed this, and he knows it.

    he declines because he's not interested, but if one day he ever is... I'm potentially up for threesomes and letting him have fun with professional blowjobs etc. as long as he can separate the physical from the mental attachment, I don't see a problem.

    not for everyone of course, which is why cheating is different for every relationship! and people must talk to their partner to find out what is and isn't acceptable.
    Rationalizing is only lying to ones self. ](*,)

  4. #24
    Platinum Member velvette's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,112
    Cheating is an act of lying, deception, fraud, trickery, imposture, or imposition.
    rationalizing? if there is no lying or deception it is not cheating, and in saying such I am not lying so myself. haha.

    if he wanted a blowjob from another woman but I wasn't OK with it, and he went ahead anyway, that is cheating. but if I was OK with it, then how is that, in the least, cheating or lying to myself?

  5.  

  6. #25
    Platinum Member Lionel Hutz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    CrownTown Los Angeles
    Posts
    1,758
    Gender
    Male
    Because you have loopholed what being faithful is in my opinion. If you have an open relationship thats fine, but why even pose the question if your convictions were 100%? You would not need our opinions on the matter, opinions that are usually unbiased and realistic. In your head, you have thought of all the ways and reasons why he is still faithful and what being faithful is. A rationalization, a very very close cousin to denial.

    Don't be upset if you grow and realise that really was not the case, and that you have set a level of respect that may not be too high. "She lets me do what I want" so the second you do feel uncomfortable, if ever, be prepared for an emotional reality check.

    When you say "Professional Sex" thats like me being a crackhead and merely saying Ive a "Cocaine Problem." It sounds alright, but everyone around knows the probable outcome of this activity. Best wishes with your relationship and health.

  7. #26
    Platinum Member velvette's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,112
    I meant professional because they can offer sexual techniques I wouldn't even know of. perhaps we can learn a thing or two from them. I wouldn't be OK with friends or acquaintances, random people who aren't really good at sex.

    we don't have an open relationship actually. and we probably won't. but I personally don't mind, and I know there are people who practice open relationships with health and success.

    I have not loopholed what faithful is or isn't, I am just defining it for what it really is. just because a blowjob is cheating in your mind doesn't mean it is, or should be, in everyone else's.

  8. #27
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    832
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by confusedgirly
    I've recently found out that some guys (small percentage I'd hope) don't consider getting a blow-job from another girl (while in a relationship) cheating.

    To me that seems like a warped, sick-in-the-head idea. Of course that's cheating!

    Does anyone have any idea why these guys would have this opinion?
    The only ones who say this are the ones who got caught.

  9. #28

    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,996
    Gender
    Female
    Any act of intimacy, even flirting or sharing deep emotions with another OS other then your partner is cheating.

    If you wouldn't want to tell your partner about it, or it would bother you if someone would do that to you, it's cheating.

    My boyfriend and I feel very strongly about this. Even if I was fantasizing about guys and I told him this, even if nothing physical happened, he would still feel betrayed and seriously question the relationship. To alot of people, thinking or "looking" is perfectly normal, as long as you don't act on it. But to us, even thinking hard on the subject is one step away from cheating.

  10. #29
    Platinum Member midnightrambler's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    4,341
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by confusedgirly
    I've recently found out that some guys (small percentage I'd hope) don't consider getting a blow-job from another girl (while in a relationship) cheating.

    To me that seems like a warped, sick-in-the-head idea. Of course that's cheating!

    Does anyone have any idea why these guys would have this opinion?
    to ease their conscience

  11. #30
    Platinum Member JeckyllNHyde's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    5,442
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by confusedgirly
    I've recently found out that some guys (small percentage I'd hope) don't consider getting a blow-job from another girl (while in a relationship) cheating.

    To me that seems like a warped, sick-in-the-head idea. Of course that's cheating!

    Does anyone have any idea why these guys would have this opinion?
    What about the idea that being in another country and hooking up isn't cheating? My guy friend told me I should just cheat b/c anyways "nobody will find out". It's the principle of it all!! And whatever happened to staying faithfull..
    Maybe they got the idea from American Pie? (Stifler) Lol.

Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •