How to cope with the distance and stay close in your relationship

“Distance makes the heart grow fonder.” We’ve all heard this old adage, but it means little in a relationship where one partner is forced to bear the brunt of distance physically and emotionally. The burden of longing for something—or someone—so far out of reach can be devastating, especially as each day stretches into weeks and months with no end in sight. Whether you are apart due to physical location, career paths, or life choices, the longing can feel never-ending. Fortunately, there are things you and your partner can do to remain close while apart.

One of the first things you can do is schedule frequent check-ins. These don’t have to be long, drawn out conversations. Just a few minutes each day where you can both be on the same page (no matter how far apart you are). While these minuscule interactions may not seem like much, they will help keep both of you mindful of the other.

Once the basics have been established, use technology as a way to bridge the gap between physical location. Video chat is a great tool to use not only to communicate but to help build intimacy in your relationship. It may not seem like much, but hearing your voice and seeing your face can make all the difference. If video isn’t your thing, a handwritten letter or postcard can be even more meaningful. Taking the time to handwrite and mail your thoughts expresses so much more than the usual text or email.

It’s easy to want to overcompensate when it comes to physical distance. You will feel temptations to shower each other with gifts just to remind the other that you haven’t forgotten. And while it’s alright sometimes, this should not be a crutch in your relationship. There are countless other ways to show love that don't involve spending money, such as making Spotify playlists, sending surprise care packages, or joining a virtual book club. The key here is to focus on those activities that bring both of you closer together instead of further apart.

Finally, utilize the smaller moments in between. Even if you can’t be physically together, use facial expression, body language, and humor to convey affection. Make sure to remind one another of the small details—favorite foods, jokes, phrases, or special props like hats or glasses—this creates an added level of comfort when you're far away.

No matter the situation, distance can never erase the bond between two people. The beauty of a committed relationship is the faith and trust two people have in each other despite the circumstances. Take advantage of the unique opportunity to express yourself in remarkable ways, and make it through each moment as a stronger couple.