Overwhelming emotion of simply ... missing him.

Hello everybody, I've been on this forum many times before over the last 6 years and you've helped me get through them. But here I am again.

I should probably go into detail about my story, but right now all I can say is it's a very sad break up. I love him, and he's not sure he can love me, coupled with extra work commitments he doesn't think he can hold down a relationship so wants to end things.

I asked him to have a good thinka bout things again before he made his final desicion, and that I would move closer to him so seeing each other would be easier, and he agreed he will have a think.

This feels unlike the rest of my break ups (but don't they all feel different?) in that all I feel is a great sadness, and overwhelmingly missing him. Every 30 seconds a fond memory goes through my head.

How the hell is this ever going to go away? I met someone amazing and he didn't treat me badly. There is no anger for me to hang on too, there is no confusion as to why this has happened, there is no hate I harbour.

So just what the hell do I do? Right now no song is soothing me, I can't watch tv or a movie, everything hurts.

I've taken time off work, I can't stand to be there right now and a looking elsewhere for work.

I just feel like yes things will get easier but there will always be a scar and I'll never truly stop missing him. It scares me so much, I just want to sleep and not wake up sometimes.

I feel like half of my soul has been ripped away, I feel like he was the one I was waiting on all these years, and now gone so soon.

Time heals but it does leave scars. I will always bear a scar after my 13 year relationship ended. But I've moved on and am happy

Every once in a while, I think back a bit wistfully and there is a twinge of pain, but that's it now

Some people stay in our memories forever, but it's not necessarily a bad thing.

You're in the early stages of the breakup and it's still overwhelming

It will get better once you make it through the grief stage

Hang in and know that life will get better and that you will find someone to love and be loved by.

Day by day it will get just a little bit better. You'll always have the scar but you'll also have the happy memories.

Be glad that it was a gentle break up, that you don't have anger or confusion as these can stop us moving on. You'll find somebody else. People come into our lives to teach us things, I'm sure you learnt many great lessons from him that you can be thankful for.

Time heals but it does leave scars. I will always bear a scar after my 13 year relationship ended. But I've moved on and am happy

 

Every once in a while, I think back a bit wistfully and there is a twinge of pain, but that's it now

 

Some people stay in our memories forever, but it's not necessarily a bad thing.

 

You're in the early stages of the breakup and it's still overwhelming

It will get better once you make it through the grief stage

 

Hang in and know that life will get better and that you will find someone to love and be loved by.

Yeah, I guess I'm just worried I'm going to stay as I am now for the foreseeable future. Every day is painful and a struggle to get through.

Day by day it will get just a little bit better. You'll always have the scar but you'll also have the happy memories.

Be glad that it was a gentle break up, that you don't have anger or confusion as these can stop us moving on. You'll find somebody else. People come into our lives to teach us things, I'm sure you learnt many great lessons from him that you can be thankful for.

I don't know, I feel like I've learnt I am unloveable. He was perfect for me and I just don't see me meeting anyone else like him.

Hopefully you won't meet anyone else like him, because he wasn't for you. You'll meet someone better because that person will love you for who you are

Clinton is right. I know its hard right now but focus on yourself. The pain will linger for a few days and maybe a few weeks or months. The confusion of 'why' will engulf you and you have to physically shake it loose. I also was in a perfect union. Prior to him, I felt like I couldn't be loved. But this man proved otherwise. Circumstances and his career got in the way. He made me happier than I could have ever pictured.

But this was a lesson to show me that I am loveable, I can make someone happy, I can be in a happy healthy relationship. All things I wondered about for all the years I was trying to find the right one. But if it can end and he can leave, it wasn't the right one for me. As perfect as it all felt, destiny was not for us to be together and I have to be okay with that.

If a door closes, don't bang on it, have faith that whatever is on the other side is not for you. Learn the good things, keep them with you and take them into the next relationship. But give yourself time to learn who you are without him again. Knowing who you are and the things that make you happy will help you when you are ready to add someone else into your life again.

Its a lengthy process and repair comes from within. Once you make yourself the focus, it gets easier. Sure you will have bad days, they will feel horrible. But slowly there will be more good days than bad. That is the progress you want to keep.

I wish you well.

Oh I know how you feel. It's so hard to pick yourself back up again and have any feeling for anything. And I understand that feeling of a breakup feeling different from the rest, because my previous breakup was with someone I was with for five years and it hurt, but this last recent breakup of just about three years feels so different and hurts even more. I think because like you were saying it was a pretty good relationship otherwise, so it feels almost wrong to have it end. From my experience, instead of trying to let them go when it's painful, if you just focus on yourself and busy yourself with life, you more so naturally let go of them through that. Cyber hugs to you!

I am definitely trying to focus on me, but I can't say it doesn't feel all pointless without him in my life. Right now I am very focused on excercise which I guess is a good thing. At the very least I want a six pack out of all of this!

I'm sorry to see you're suffering something similar and yes you're so right, I have little feeling for anything right now, it's all so pointless. And it definitely feels wrong to end, what hurts the most is that he said if he could fall for me right now he would, so I'm begging for him to give us another go and who knows, maybe he will fall this time.

I hope if it doesn't work out I can have enough stuff to focus on and gradually get a bit better. Much love to you x