Ashamed to admit if my parents are alcoholics

TBH I dont really know where to start. i am now 23, and i think tonight for the first time i have fully realised my parents are alcoholics. my dad goes to his local pub every night and has at least three drinks, more so than not ending up him being very very drunk. he is not physically abusive, but his mood does change. it makes me feel so angry and hurt that he doesnt care. my mother has maybe one when she goes to pick him up. and every friday night without fail for as long as i can remember has had what she calls a 'wine' night with her friends, and gets pretty drunk aswell. they both smoke aswell, i dont know how much a day, but it appears to be a fair few. they have both been in hospital before, my mum collapsed after drinking and my dads lung collapsed due to smoking im guessing, they both could have easily died and yet they continue this way. not giving a second thought to me or my sister, they lost thier businuess around 7 years ago, and were declared bankrupt, they both have respectable jobs now, and seem happy with thier work, but there was debts from the last businuess, so money has been tight since then, but yet they can still afford to spend this amount on alcohol and cigarettes, i dont know, i am 23 maybe is should get on with my own life? thankfully i have not drank in over 2 months now, not that i had a problem, i just dont want to end up like my dad, and appear to show the same signs when i drink(not content with having just one drink, becoming moody and bitter etc). last year i stopped for a solid 9 months before having afew social drinks, then going all out and drinking a little heavier. i am a little lost. and dont know what to do, this is affecting my relationship slightly, and i am just looking for a little advice? any would be greatly appreciated.

I'm glad that you realize the risks of having alcoholic parents. You DO have a higher risk of being an alcoholic. My advice? STAY AWAY from alcohol and other drugs, all drugs in fact. Even social drinking...it doesn't sound like you do well with drinking. It's possible that your genes just make it so that you don't react to alcohol in a healthy way and that's not your fault - it's your genes. However, you can reduce the risk of you going down that road by taking proactive steps.

Don't drink, stay away from drugs, maybe attend some therapy just to learn some "coping" skills so you don't fall into bad habits. It's NOT your fault that your parents were this way, it doesn't make you a bad person and you are not doomed. It's okay to admit it...

and please make sure that you don't date any alcoholics. Parents of alcoholics can become "enablers" or begin drinking themselves. Seek out healthy people with healthy habits and you'll be fine.

you poor soul. right ive not had the misfortune with your experience. but i can hopefully point you in the right direction. firstly welcome aboard. now the mood swings your father portrays is soley down to the grog. NOT YOU!

get yourslef up to the doctors and explain all and he/she will point you in the right direction, they wont see it as a watse of their time, they will see it as saving not 1 but 2 even three people, the third being yourself.

you are not drinking as you would like socially because of the worry you have for ending up like ya folks, thats only natural. i fret every day with cancer or heart failure, its what my folks died from, so to feel like that at any age is NORMAL!

dont make it obvious to your folks what you are going to do to help them they may think your intefering. be wise be smart!

but but, in the fullness of time you have to weigh up your life. you are only young and if all else fails you would be doing nothing more than flogging a dead horse.

its going to be a tough call for you.

Seems like you have a strong grasp of the situation and what exactly you dont want to become and thats admirable. You cant change your parents, addicts/alchohlics have to do that themselves.

I guess my question is, what is effecting your relationship?

Hey guys, i spoke to my parents about my concerns, and they have reassured me not to worry, it is there life, it does not affect there work or anything tbh, they are hard workers, as i said they lost thier businuess, so they r working very hard to get back on top. they assured me not to worry about them, they are happy and you guys on here are right, i cant change them, thank you for your concerns. i think things r going to be ok. your replies mean the world to me. i have never got proper advice or information about this sort of thing, u have picked me up so much more than you guys will ever knw. thanks x