Capricorn3

With so many red flags waving about, the last thing I would do is think about proposals/weddings/marriage. Marriage based on lack of trust and deceit etc, usually fails. Heed the warnings.

Maybe time to listen to your therapist? 😉

I was thinking the same thing - it's really hard to follow and confusing. OP, can you clarify please?

^ I second the above in bold. I would also report him.

^ This. Totally sexual incompatible. I'd make him an EX so fast he wouldn't know what hit him. Littlefish..... don't put up with this. Don't do this to yourself. He needs to be gone. The sooner the better.

Once trust is broken, it very rarely ever comes back and without trust, you have nothing (imo).

I was wondering the same thing. Is this the guy you were "testing"? If so, I recall he maybe wasn't too interested - I got the impression it's more friendship rather than romantic interest.

OP, it's clear you have made up your mind on what you intend doing. In that case, there's not much left to say (or advise) other than good luck.

I get the impression that whatever you expressed in your message made him really uncomfortable and he didn't know how to handle it. You mentioned you are gay - maybe he thought you were trying to "get together" with him - and if he is straight, he felt uncomfortable.

I get the impression he decided he's not going to wait to have sex. If you are a no sex before marriage kinda girl, I think he had a reality check and decided he's not going to wait that long. I would cut my losses and move on.

I totally agree with ALL the posters above. OP, what is a little concerning is that no matter what red flags people have pointed out to you, you keep defending and finding excuses. Why is that? Is your self-esteem so low that you feel you can't do any better? Or would you say you're the kind who thrives on drama? What do get out of this mess? Just reading your subject title, this should tell you everything - it's a dysfunctional "relationship" and a hot mess. Train wreck comes to mind. Do yourself a huge favor and quit. You can do a lot better.

We're well aware of that - hence my saying: " Blatant staring? Not so good. Wandering eye will always be there, but not being obvious about it. "

^ Been married for a lifetime and I know my husband looks and sees ever female we pass, lol. But, we're also a rather weird couple whereby we actually point out good looking people to each other, lol. I say things like "wow, did you see that stunning woman!?" and his reply is always "yep", lol. Or if I see a rather gorgeous looking man and mention "wow, he's gorgeous", my husband always says "I'll buy him for you for Christmas" 😄 Men will always look. Women look (I know I do). It's normal human reaction (imo). Blatant staring? Not so good. Wandering eye will always be there, but not being obvious about it.

^ THIS entire post is worth repeating. Great post Cat. 👍

Sounds like he needs some serious anger management. To my mind, when things get to a point where you can't stand the sight or company of your partner anymore, then it's time to leave.