Amy_562 Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 I started talking to this guy online a few months ago. We get along great, we've talked on the phone and we've even seen each other a couple of times. He's openly told me that he attracted to me and until then I'd had no reason to doubt him. One day, I decided to google him and found a forum that he participates on frequently and on it, he spoke of a girlfriend(he's always told me he's single) and I'm pretty sure that he was not talking about me. After I read that, I proceeded with caution. He still acts like he's interested in me and continues to tell me that he has no girlfriend but I am hesitant to pursue something with him if he's lying to me. How can I confront him(or find out the truth, for that matter) without admitting that I was sorta snooping? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 I don't think you were snooping - it was on a public web site, right? Are you sure that the posting was recent?? Link to comment
DN Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 Are you sure it is him and not someone with the same name? Are you certain that it is not you he is talking about? Are you sure that the information on the website is accurate and up to date? Link to comment
Amy_562 Posted April 9, 2007 Author Share Posted April 9, 2007 It's recent. He spoke of going to the movies with his girlfriend, dropping her off at the airport, random everyday stuff, etc. He was not talking about me and the website is very much up to date. I a 100% sure that it is him. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 Ok - how about this - send him the link and say "that's funny that you would say you took me to the airport" Link to comment
Amy_562 Posted April 9, 2007 Author Share Posted April 9, 2007 He hasn't mentioned her name. I do not know if she participates on the forum. I googled him mainly out of boredom and just came upon the forum. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 Sorry, Amy, I edited my post because, duh, I realized you said he didn't mention her name - maybe my suggestion will be more helpful. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 How do you know he participates on that forum regularly? Did he tell you he did or had you asked? Just trying to get a feel for the situation. Link to comment
Amy_562 Posted April 9, 2007 Author Share Posted April 9, 2007 I looked at the dates on his replies. The last time he mentioned her was a few weeks ago-days after we'd talked on the phone. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 I agree that it is "probably" him (and I am sorry) -- since he knows you know he participates on that forum (he does know, right?) can't you casually mention that you were bored and looked at the forum the other day? Link to comment
candycoating Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 hmm why not just get it over with it. Just tell him exactly how you feel or maybe write down your feelings, and just read it off slowly.. make sure he stays quiet and listens. But I cant tell you what to say cos I dont know him I dont know how he will be acting.only you do.so go for it write how you feel n read it to him. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 I would just be honest about it and tell him you saw the forum and you want to know if he has a girlfriend, because if so you are not interested in pursuing a relationship with a man who is taken. Link to comment
Amy_562 Posted April 9, 2007 Author Share Posted April 9, 2007 Thanks to all for your advice. I really want to confront him about it. I think I know someone who can give me solid proof that he *does* in fact have girlfriend. Once I am fully certain of what's going on, then I'll know what to do. (Though maybe this is just me trying to find loopholes b/c I really liked this guy). Link to comment
Hope75 Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 Thanks to all for your advice. I really want to confront him about it. I think I know someone who can give me solid proof that he *does* in fact have girlfriend. Once I am fully certain of what's going on, then I'll know what to do. (Though maybe this is just me trying to find loopholes b/c I really liked this guy). I'm not sure what you think is wrong with pointing out what you saw on that forum. But if it makes you feel better to have solid proof, go for it. I just hope in the meantime you keep your distance. A guy who is a cheater and a liar is not a good catch. Link to comment
Amy_562 Posted April 10, 2007 Author Share Posted April 10, 2007 I'm keeping my distance. I blocked him online and rarely answer his calls(if I do, I tell him I'm busy). It's hard to try to keep my cool and pretend b/c I am very angry at him for lying to me and can't quite say anything until I have solid proof and he can't accuse me of snooping or anything. Link to comment
desert_rose26 Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 I'm keeping my distance. I blocked him online and rarely answer his calls(if I do, I tell him I'm busy). It's hard to try to keep my cool and pretend b/c I am very angry at him for lying to me and can't quite say anything until I have solid proof and he can't accuse me of snooping or anything. if you blocked him on IM, won't he feel like something is wrong? Link to comment
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