I hate my ex's new girlfriend and my son around her

[marusha]

I am a disturbed soul and a mother of a 4 year old. DO not have family in US, brought here as a fiancee and later on divorced. Never stopped loving my ex, possessed by wide range of feeling - anger, jealousy, hurt and pain.

There was so much said and done that we are beyond civil.

I was coping, there were lawyers and courts envolved, I pretty much missed my chance and eneded up with what what courts push now 'shared physical and legal custody". A child is shoved back and forth. But what I dreaded most of all finally came - an old 4 times married tramp stepped into picture, my ex totally obsessed with her and instead of providing 2 steady homes for our son takes him on his sex sprees 2 hours away to her house and then they come back, lock themselves in his house and wait till his parenting time arrives and then go back to her house. I hate my son to be around that woman, this new mom-dad thing, she calls him "honey" and was even trying to give me huge bouquetts of flowers , sort of sign for friendship and to impress him what a lovely person she is.

It was such a phony, tacky , fake scene. He wouldn't even disclose the phone where my son can be reached out of state - and he just had a head injury yesterday, barely escaped stiches and I cannot even talk to him. This love-hate feeling is too overwhelming, I am jealous out of my mind but realize that that's the end to it, if she makes him happy, so be it but there is no reason my boy should be a part of it, they are not married, just "in heat".

 

Can anyone talk to me??

 

Lovw

Marusha

[Wandering_Sword]

Welcome to ENA and sorry to hear of your pain. As for your son, it is very ignorant of the father to be dragging your son to his sexual jaunts. And the worst part of this is that the courts are involved. I was curious, I thought the legal system favoured the mothers in this sort of situation, so wouldn't your son be in your custody most of the time?

Don't worry about the ex too much, if this woman he's with holds true to form, he will feel the follies of a "four times" married woman when she grinds his gears after the honeymoon period is over.

Keep strong, we're here for you.

[EvaGina]

I would contact your lawyer.

If you have shared custody you have a legal right to know the contact number for your child.

and being neglected while his father humps away in the next room is no good for your son. Stamp your feet, throw your weight around... put aside all personal feelings and do what is best for your child.

[My Heart Hurts]

Marusha, I'm in the exact same boat as you are. My ex left me for another woman and carried on with this affair for many years before I found out the truth. He was taking our baby around this woman, and to throw me off, they allowed my son to call her his "Aunt". Because I feel like she is partly to blame for our releationship breakup, I do not want my son around her AT ALL. She doesn't deserve to be my child's "step-mother", when she is part of the reason why my child is fatherless in the first place.

 

My ex and I have not gone through the courts as of yet, but he keeps saying that he wants custody too. And the thing is that it sucks because unless he's a threat to the child, there's nothing you can really do about keeping the child away from the new girlfriend. I guess this is what is meant in the saying life isn't fair, and in this case, it's not. It's like they can walk out, turn you're life upside down, and move on without a further thought. Meanwhile, you are stuck trying to pick up the pieces of your life all while trying to get through the pain. It sucks big time.

[marusha]

Thanks for your reply. It's means a lot to me.

 

Yes, it's sad, your ex left you for another women and your baby was part of it. But bless yourself y ou don't do this "courts new favorite nightmare" - shared physical and legal thing... At least your child knows one home, has sense of home, hopefully you have family around and your ex even if he goes to court, he can have every other weekend or smth like that. I just feel sad that 4 times married * * * * * who is old enough to be my son's grandmother is around my son and the guys thinks not with their heads.... I am disgusted, yesterday I saw them including my son walking holding hands on Main street, I just had to walk by like I am no one and my son screaming "mommy". Do you want that???? Please get away from your ex as far as possible, never regret of anything, just never ever go for anything shared physically, justpossible visitations...

 

Love

Marusha