strawberrywine Posted September 7, 2003 Share Posted September 7, 2003 My ex and I broke up a little over a month ago, and at first when I would see him at school I would smile and wave, but then I started ignoring him completely. I would walk right by him and not even look at him. We didn't have a very nice break, so I was hurt. I guess I should have either ignored him right after the breakup or just kept beings friends with him, but I guess I wanted to make him miss me. Anyway, I decided to say hello to him Friday. He said hey back and asked me what was up but he seemed like he'd rather be anywhere than there talking to me. I think I really hurt him by ignoring him, but I don't know what to do now. He hates me and he'll never want me back now. Any advice? Thanks. Link to comment
Mar Posted September 7, 2003 Share Posted September 7, 2003 Well, you've given him mixed signals....you don't have to "make" someone miss you in that situation, it's safe to say they're already going to. (Not to mention that it's hurtful to attempt to manipulate someone's feelings, especially right after a breakup.) And who initiated the breakup, you or him? Put yourself in his shoes....you broke up, and right after that, you're friendly to him. After THAT, you ignore him....I'd guess he's still hurt over the breakup (even if he initated it) and trying to sort his feelings. Give him a chance to work things out, and if and when he's ready, he'll talk to you again. Link to comment
strawberrywine Posted September 7, 2003 Author Share Posted September 7, 2003 Thanks Mar. He broke up with me, not in a very nice way either. I had been fighting with him a lot, and he had just been doing a lot to irritate me. Finally he blew up at me and ended it. Like I said though, we were friendly after the breakup until I started ignoring him. I know that I hurt him and I feel really bad about that. So should I just start being friendly to him again? Link to comment
Turboz Posted September 7, 2003 Share Posted September 7, 2003 If I were you I would just apologise to him for being difficult to him before you broke up. Tell him how sorry you are and if he'd like to hang out with you sometime he's welcome to call. Thats really all you can do! Link to comment
adidas7fire Posted September 7, 2003 Share Posted September 7, 2003 hey there.. i was just like you.. my ex and i broke up a month ago but our relationship of anything is nothing now... why? here's the story from the beginning, short and sweet... when my ex was first talking to me, he was in a relationship with a girl he had been with for over 2 years... and then dumped her for me. thereforeeeee, we were together for over 2 years and he began talking to this girl and then bam!... dumped me to date her. do we see a pattern here? yeah, so it makes total sense that all this would happen. so i am not surprised.. i give this new relationship he has with her the same amount of time before he does it again. it hurt at the beginning when everything was new and i was in denial for a while until i realized that there was someone out there who would treat me better and i've found someone who does just that. i didn't want to waste anymore time being friendly with a guy that didn't want to make an effort to reciprocate the gesture. we work together at the same place but don't talk at all... we don't even look at each other, unless it's a die-hard must. i don't want to be friends with someone i know who is deceitful and not honest, like he. there will always be better people out there for you and like me, you'll find someone out there, sometimes in the strangest places. so with all this said, you need to make a choice, either be his friend and nothing more or forget about him and move on. don't play games with him or yourself, it's not fair to either one of you. good luck! Link to comment
Mar Posted September 7, 2003 Share Posted September 7, 2003 I'd just apologize for my behavior and let him know that you didn't intend to hurt him, you were just adjusting to the situation the only way you knew how to, but that you know it was wrong and didn't mean to be difficult. Let it go at that and just see what happens! Link to comment
ansleynicole Posted September 7, 2003 Share Posted September 7, 2003 I myself tried the ignoring thing here lately and he does it right back to me and I don't like it. I mainly just ignored my ex to get back at him and to make him think that I didn't care about him when really it was just the opposite, I love him to death. I really can't tell you what to do cause that is the question that I would like answered myself. I don't feel as though I can go up to my ex and say anything and he acts funny around me half the time like he is ignoring me or don't see me or whatever and I don't get it.... Link to comment
strawberrywine Posted September 7, 2003 Author Share Posted September 7, 2003 Thanks to all the responses. I'm going to try to talk to him, just to try to be his friend. It's hard though, I just don't think I could call him, and I don't see him all that much in school, just in the busy hallways. I guess if I get the opportunity I'll take it. Thanks everyone. All advice is welcome. Link to comment
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