That about does it.

[itsallgrand]

Quite in shock. Just got back from having coffee with the fiance and live in of my ex. Ex....who was playing us both for a long time.

Even though I was moving on from him - I didn't expect this.

It's a blow.

This day has been nuts.

 

Too many deceptions and lies and betrayals. I feel physically sick. I feel especially sick, knowing, he hurt two of us.

For so long. Lying about the most sacred of things.

And she is a much worse place than I to recover. She lives with him. She got fed all the lines I didn't. Marriage. Family. Babies.

 

He is the worse kind of loser. And I wasted so much of my life with him. Blind as a bat.

 

I need to grow up. The self pity and doubts got me here. I couldn't see.

 

One of Robowarrior's inspirational pep talks on when life gives you a blow, keep slugging back and living would be great.

 

I looked him in the face and saw a selfish selfish man. Without regret or understanding of the damage he has done. And it makes me sick. I could only express myself bluntly, and even that much seemed too good for him. I didn't cry or get angry. I just said what was on my mind. To hear it outloud. Know it is real.

It was for me.

 

I found myself my worse nightmare in him. And I walked away from it tonight with my head helt high - walking away like that felt good - yet completely drained dry.

 

Of all the times for this to come out, this is the stupidest time. It is like he baited for it. With the simplest efforts, he could have avoided it all and no one ever would have known.

 

I mostly just want to puke.

 

He doesn't have the right to do this. To tear at people's lives. To toy with them as though they meant nothing.

 

He is weak. I am stronger. I've been through worse than this.

[karvala]

Three cheers for you! You are, as I can clearly sense from your posts, SO much better than this guy, and SO capable of having a much better life with someone else, that it's uplifting to see this. You got out, and you're moving on to a better place. He will remain in that bad place, because it is he that makes it bad. Your light will shine again now.

 

I'm also delighted, from a purely selfish point of view I must admit(!), to see you here again.

[sophie274]

I don't know what to say ... I'm so sorry. What a terrible betrayal. It must hurt so much to find out something like that about someone you used to care about, especially since it sounds like he went out of his way to make it sting.

 

I've read a lot of your posts, and you sound so strong, I know you will be alright. You are so much better than him and better off without him, and you will rise above this even better and stronger. Keep on truckin'!

[itsallgrand]

Karvala, thank you for the kind words. Gotta admit it feels very nice to know you enjoy my company around here.

 

And thank you Sophie. For your vote of confidence too.

 

I'm still a bit in shock about it. Honestly. I thought I knew this person. I thought we had a life together that was real.

 

All I can say at the moment is that it feels good to be here with a genuine feeling in me now of self respect.

 

I know I am better than him and his crap. I deserve a real life. I know that now.

That feels great.

 

In a way, I'm almost thankful to the bastid. What he has done is horrible but it reminded me of my strength. And I will never allow a weak man to suckle from me again!!

I will be honest with myself when I am settling for less than I deserve. Being alone definetly IS better than having someone crap on your soul.

[Daddy Bear]

Hey, grandy. It's your old pal with a slightly new name. (Don't tell the ex - she stalks me!)

 

Sorry big to hear what you've been put through. At the same time, I've always admired and drawn inspiration from your uncommon strength, and I've no doubt that you'll come out of this with flying colors at the end of the day. Don't ever change!!

 

*BIG HUG*

[itsallgrand]

Oh, my pal! Yeaaa!! That brightens me day a bit. *hugs*

 

It does my soul good right now to hear and see some men out in this world who are kind even though there is nothing to get from me. That sounds bad but you know what I mean! I'm angry as of yet.

 

It's good to be reminded sometimes that not all men are scum. You know what I mean!