Dumper Acting Without Respect

[kate111]

I feel like calling my ex and telling him off for not telling me the truth about the break up, for just cutting off with little to no explanation. After 3 years!

 

I haven't even told him what he did was wrong. I just started no contact.

 

Should I surpress it? Give him a serve and then do no contact? or blow up his house?

 

Opinions please.

[sidehop]

Even if you tell him off that'll only push him away even further. NC is your best bet right now. For a guy to cut off a relationship, there has to be something big that changed his life...I hate to say this but often another person in their life.

 

And let's not blow up his house I'm sure one day he'll start to wonder how you are and will come forward. Whether he is with someone else or had another reason, would that make you feel better? Sometimes it's better to not know.

[freedom]

do yo think that anything you say will make a difference?

Accept that he ws not that into you and move on.

Telling hi off might just ake you feel worst if he just blows you off.

May i suggest to just move on.

[numbhead]

i feel the same about my ex,, cant get my head around how shes just brushed me off after 2 1/2 yrs like i mean and meant nothing to her!

 

she was the one who had insecurities about me all the time (for no reason at all! ive got to add)

 

i wrote her a letter,,, sent her flowers but she doesnt even have the decency to reply to me in any way!

 

the best way is the only way and that is... NC

 

god i want to make her feel pain..... but i dont at the same time....

 

 

u could always send a letter bomb... ive heard that theyr popular at the moment! lol

[Grosse vache]

u could always send a letter bomb... ive heard that theyr popular at the moment! lol

 

Would that be a small letter bomb, a medium letter bomb or a large letter bomb? Either way ensure you have enough money for the right stamp and put it in the right slot. The world sure got anal didn't it?

 

Oh and don't contact him.

[ColdWinterForest]

I got cut off at first, too, and I had to practically beg for an explanation why. I suggest that you try once, and if he does not explain himself, then go into NC immediately... I really think that you have to embrace some of the pain... in the sense that you NEED to know the truth or else your mind is just going to dwell on the "why" while you are in NC. In all honesty, he probably has someone else in his life and decided to just take the easy way out by not confronting you and cutting you off.

[Parsley]

I got a couple of answers from him...but was then ignored when he didn't feel like it. The way I've decided to see it, if he can't be bothered to give me any reasons, that gives me the all clear to make my own decisions about him and what happened, and they're hardly going to portray him in a favourable light are they? My ex has shown me just how little respect he had/has for me, and it hurts a LOT and God do I want to really just lay into him and show him how much it hurts to know that someone I loved could cause me such pain so easily.

 

But I haven't told him off. I'm determined to be the bigger person. I think the silence will be more of a guilt trip than any telling off.

[Skippy]

just a question...

did she/he love you more? Who showed more 'love'?

The reason i asked is. sometimes the one with the insecurity keeps giving, they hope for some 'love' to go their direction until they get tired of hopung. They then just walk away because they can't hope anymore.

[boontahr]

sometimes the one with the insecurity keeps giving, they hope for some 'love' to go their direction until they get tired of hopung. They then just walk away because they can't hope anymore.

 

that's kind of the situation that i was in. both my ex and i could have our insecure moments, but when she started to show noticeably less interest in me during our last month, it made me go into a kind of 'desperation' mode where i'd try anything to turn that around. despite my efforts and hope, it just didn't work out as she would constantly focus on the faults of myself and the relationship, and it only seemed inevitable that she was going to leave me at some point.

 

because i felt like i had nothing more to hope for, i decided to end our relationship. she would only be miserable for the majority of the time we spent together and all the warning signs were there that she just wasn't into me at that point.

 

not sure if this situation is relatable [if thats a word] to others, but just wanted to share as its not a case of me finding someone else and simply brushing my ex off. in retrospect, it makes more sense if she was the one who was already moving on and possibly finding someone else.

[Parsley]

boontahr - my situation was similar...but I attributed his lack of interest in me to stuff going on in his life, and decided that if he was still acting like that in a couple of months (when all the stuff would no longer be an issue) I would leave him. Alas - he dumped me first.