shoebaby1 Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 This guy at my job asked me out about 3 weeks ago. He seems really sweet,quiet and nice. He asked me out in a really nice way (only bad part was he asked me out for the same day)...BUT!.. at the time me and my boyfriend were not official again (we were on and off) So I told the guy not tonight I am going to the gym but maybe another time. Now me and my boyfriend are back together and happy and everyday I see the guy and feel like I should say something but I feel so awkward (sp?) and I feel really guilty that I just didn't tell him I was seeing someone in the first place. I know this is probably dumb but whenever a guy asks me out I feel bad saying no, no matter what. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me! Link to comment
TiredMan Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 I'm not sure what you want help with her. Obviously you need to tell him you are with your b/f. You don't need the drama of him asking again (even though he might have taken your turn down as a rejection anyway). But if he still think it's there, you need to stop it before he REALLY get persistent. Link to comment
Hubbys_glitter_is_gold Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 nothing is wrong with you and you have no reason to feel guilty about that.. I mean you dont go with him and yo u dont really talk so you owe him no explanation. Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 Hey Shoe - I think I can TOTALLY relate to that. You're just a nice person who doesn't like to hurt people. What could possibly be wrong with that??!? Do you have this guy's e-mail address?? I guess I would personally send him a note confessing it all. Just tell him you were really flattered and were contemplating saying yes but because you were still sort of tied up with your now current bf - you didn't think it would be fair to him. Apologise briefly for the delay in response but you felt bad for not coming clean to begin with and it just kind of snowballed..... Oh - and btw - you spelled awkward correctly!! Link to comment
shoebaby1 Posted February 9, 2007 Author Share Posted February 9, 2007 Well, I can't email him so I would have to do it face to face? I'M SCARED Link to comment
TiredMan Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 Don't email him. You didn't tell him when he asked you out so get out there and do it face to face. Sooner the better, I think. Link to comment
annie24 Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 I agree with Awdree. I think you should just tell him when you see him. Tell him that you are really flattered, but you and your bf have gotten back together and obviously, it wouldn't be appropriate that you go out with this guy. I bet he will understand and be relieved that it wasn't something he did wrong. Link to comment
Drizown Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 E-mail= too cowardly anyway Face to face is always the better option and there's no reason to be scared. People appreciate honestly. Bad stories are only told about liars not "Gosh I hate so and so so much the told me the truth right to my face!" You'll be fine and you'll feel tres better afterwards. And cudos for not just going out with him when you were unsure that would have been wrong. Link to comment
BeStrongBeHappy Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 i feel that same way about rejecting someone... just shows you are a nice person who wants to be considerate of other people's feelings... i think it is best you tell him since you work with him and don't want him to feel weird about it (or you either)... especially if you think he might be shy or feeling rejected (or you too guilty)... you could casually say sometime, 'you know that was really nice of you to ask me to do X with you... but i was on a break with my boyfriend and didn't feel right about it until i knew for sure if we were breaking up or not, and we did get back together...' then just change the subject and talk about something pleasant... he may be a little disappointed, but might be better for his ego... unless he is a really confident guy, in which case, just wait to see if he asks you out again, and then tell him you're back with your boyfriend, but thanks. Link to comment
g1234567890h Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 My girlfriend was still with her ex when I started dating her. I'm not exactly sure what the situation was, nor do I particularly care, but I think she left him for me. I met this guy at a party when she as still seeing him but we didn't say anything to each other. I think she was just trying to show me off to get back at him. So you shouldn't feel bad or guilty about dating someone else when your own relationship was in question. It's a natural, healthy thing to do. Link to comment
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