Interested in a work colleague, what to do?

[adecentguy]

Hi!, my first thread and hopefully its in the right place... Well for the past few weeks i have been increasingly attracted to a colleague at work, i work at Wal*Mart which has only recently opened (about 4 months ago, so still quite new) and we have both been given extra responsibility as we are both part-time Supervisors (but different departments).

 

Im just having difficulties talking or making any sort of conversation (probably from a lack of confidence) to her in any possible situation through work. I greet her and say "hi" when ever i see her and she smiles but then again working in Wal*Mart were supposed to that anyway,wherever we are within the building lol. Im not a confident person (... Full Stop!) and not having the best experience with girls has left me very un-experienced so im just not sure how too approach her, she's nice but she seems to have quite a strong confident personailty which probably 1 of the things im attracted too (only because its the opposite of me).

 

I just don't know how to get her too notice me, i mean majority of the time how i show my interst is an in-direct approach which doesn't usuall bode well with some women, again i just put it down to lack of experience and confidence. What im after is possible conversation starters and possible ideas to get her to notice me, kinda hard when were all wearing the same colour and uniform lol, anyway any advice is appricated as i have nothing too loose and hopefully something to gain.

 

Thanks... adecentguy

[robowarrior]

Ask yourself, what has being shy ever gave you for reward? Zero, so trash it. Its a win win situation for you. If you ask her out and she says no you can move on with your life, if she says yes you got a date. You don't have her now so you can only move forward if you make a move.

 

Also, pretty girls are noticed, so you need to move fast so that no one else makes a move on her. Don't waste time, and only bring love and light into eachothers lives.

[adecentguy]

I know that being shy hasn't given me anything but then again it's not like i can turn confidence on like a switch of a button or buy off a shelf although that would be better lol, but i consider her average looking, pretty (appearance wise, in my eyes anyway). It's just i feel a little intimidated by her, i think it's quite possibily her confidence or the way she portrays herself... is this normal to feel this way? just curious lol

 

I mean i can ask her and there's the possibility of getting "shot down" but then if i do, i can move on but it doesn't exactly do my confidence any favour and again i'll be in the same situation. But i do know that if i don't try i'll get no where but it's hard when, i mean i have that so-called "Nice Guy Syndrome" and trying to break that but it's hard, im tired of being girls friends and want to be more appealing to women but i don't know where too start, my confidence, appearance... i can go but im sure you get the just of it.

 

I guess im just very unsure of myself and need alot more practice, but living in such a rural place with limited place to go it makes it even harder. Other than at University doing assignmens, assessments etc im at work on the weekend to pay for tution fees and everything else that needs paying off but i am trying to give myself some free time i booked 2 weeks off work in Feburary and hopefully going to out with some friends.

 

Seezing the moment and hoping the best is what i can only do, i know but it's hard... if i did decide to do it, should it be done during or after work? because im unsure of her time-table with us being on different departments in the store?

 

Thanks for the advice so far, im still open to other people's advice if anyone can spare some time.

[ladeedah]

When you say you try to get her attention in an indirect way, what does that mean? What are you saying to her?

[Mr. Jones]

Listen, the best way you can do this man is by chance. Believe me, I have been in your shoes many times..and from personal experience it has never worked out. Sitting, waiting, wishing something would happen WILL NOT help you. You need to act! Just do it, think of something to say her and initiate conversation.

Maybe something along the lines of "how her department is going that day" etc. Use your environment - it is always a good convo starter. BUT MOST OF ALL stop telling yourself you don't have confidence! Create a mindset that you will do it and go with that..else wise, you will be down because you didn't.

 

goodluck