ladeedah

I feel like I can so relate to this story!!! I can speak from expereince when i tell u that people mirror you. How you act to him, will be how he acts in turn to you. I had the same thing and I decided to grow up and no matter how insecure I felt, I started to smile at him and ask how he was and joking around and he started to relax as well. I invited him to my birthday party and he came, I feel if anything happens with him, its because I decided to bring my walls down,otherwise you will stay in this situaation forever and just keep pining for him.LET UR WALLS DOWN,GIRL! Be vunerable, i know its scary but its the only way. Good luck!

I'm pretty sure that this guy I like likes me back but is shy. I realized after a long time of being awkward and weird around each other that he basically is mirroring me and so I started to relax around him (which is not always easy) and he as a result is way more relaxed around me.He looks for reasons to approach me, sometimes lame excuses, but I just accept it and play along.I invited him to my birthday party and he brought me a beautiful wine. I wouold love him to ask me out already but I feel I've put myself out there as much as I can. Any advice to spurring him to ask me out, or words of encouragement on the progress.Please don't tell me to ask him out,its not an option. Thank you

I made a party for my birthday and among the guests I invited a guy I like and I think he likes me but is too shy to make a move. Everyone came with a cute little gift like inexpensive wine or chocolate or stuffed animals. He came with really expensive bottle of wine(an expensive champagne to be exact),like everyone noticed how special it was. Would a guy bring this kind of gift if he wasn't trying to impress me or show me he thinks I'm special? Would you bring a special gift to a girl you weren't interested on?

Apparently,not.

I invited him a couple of months ago to a party at my house. He accepted the invitation. He was a bit distant to me maybe because my family and friends were around me but the fact is he came. Thats a good sign,right?

So I am pretty sure this guy I like likes me. He is always trying to get my attention and coming over and talking to me about lame things,like he looks for excuses.He is an outgoing guy with everyone but with me he seems shyer. Sometimes,he will stand right in front of my face and make deep eye contact and other times he will look down to the floor if I look him in the eye. He is always looking to pass things to me,to connect with me but he never asks me personal questions like about my work or my family or how I am feeling. Its almost like he is afraid to show me that he cares, or maybe he doesn't? I'm so confused. When we talk about him sometimes he opens up about his own personal things and I know he is a very closed person. But I don't understand why he can't cross the line and show me that he is interested in my own personal life. Is he just not interested or is this another shy guy characteristic?

When you say you try to get her attention in an indirect way, what does that mean? What are you saying to her?

So this guy and I both work in a school cafeteria. I sense that he likes me he always looks for reasons to talk to me about the most idiotic things regarding the setup of the food or asking my opinions on the menu. He doesn't invlove anyone else we work with.He comes and stands really close to me makes direct eye contact. He doesn't seem shy with other people though. His sister comes in sometimes to visit with his baby nephew and he plays with him in front of me and than he always comes over and passes him to me to hold, while he goes off somewhere for a second. Guys, does it sound like he likes me and is just trying to get close to me in a natural way?

What are some of the ways you have attempted to get close to a girl you liked in a very comfortable, non invasive, non intimidating way? Like what kind of excuses did you give to try to be around her and talk to her b/c you were not ready to ask her out straight away?

Thanks for your replies.I think Charley really hit the mark b/c we have known each other for a long time and I know he is not a shy guy but around me he is.We've slowly been upping the friendship like a couple of weeks ago i invited him to a party I made and although he had fun he was pretty distant to me (well, my family was there as well) and also when I saw him later that week but this week he seemed extra friendly and asked me to help him collate some papers with him at work. I feel as long as I am patient for now and let him take his breaks, he comes back better for it. Hope he eventally asks me out!

Is it normal for a guy to pull away a bit when he feels things are getting too close or intense for him and than when he calms down he returns? This guy I like and I'm pretty sure he likes me. We see each other weekly at work and sometimes we do stuff together and I find that when it seems like we are getting closer, he takes a bit of a cooling off period where he is not as eager to be around me and than after he comes back and things pick up where they left off. I don't think he is playing games and I don't get "unfriendly" vibes,more like I need a bit of space. Is this normal?

What kind of things do MEN do to show their attraction in a girl and get her attention?

Its crazy how similar our stories are!!! I also have worked hard to bring down the wall between us and we are much more comfortable around each other..he teases me but is protective ...and although I'm gald he doesn't freeze up around me, it does make me a bit nervous, like what if he doesn't like me? But...I think all that nervousness did nothing productive and at the end of the day if you are more comfortable being around each other that is a good basis for him to feel secure enough to ask you out when he is ready. Good luck!!! I'm keeping up with your story!

Thanks for all your amazing answers, especially yours,Charley, b/c I think you hit the mark. We know each other for a long time and when I started liking him I became shy around him and we kind of danced the shy dance for a long time,mirroring each other I suppose, but I finally figured out that how I act directly correlates to how he does so I started bringing my wall down and he has been responding nicely. Funny thing is he is not a shy person at all,in fact very outgoing and that he was shy around me was weird. Now that the wall is down he is friendly with me but I'm hoping he still likes me

So shy guy and I who had been awkward around each other for ages are finally "friends". I took the ball in my hands and just made major efforts to relax around him and he in turn in now relaxed around me. No more freezing up or looking down to the floor. Now, he teases me and says protctive things like coming to my rescue like when I said in a recent group setting I didn't like the food so much at a recent event he says "Well, at least she's honest" he or that people from the south are usually really nice(I'm from the south). But he isnt making moves to ask me out. We are definitely more comfortable around each other. Should I feel that he is no longer interested b/c he is no longer nervous around me or do you think sometimes guys like to build a frienship and feel secure enough with a girl that she won't reject them?

What are the major signs that sexual chemistry exists between a man and a woman who haven't gotten to the touching stage yet.Like,still in the flirting stage. Please include obvious and not so obvious.

Thanks guys and just for the record I was not flirting with the other one. I like the shy one and do not want to make him jealous or insecure b/c i know it will get me nowhere. It would just make shy guy run like the wind.

How do guys react when they see someone else flirting with a girl they like? I was walking with a guy that I like but who is a bit shy but I think he likes me too and this other guy who was with us was totally flirting with me and shy guy kind of got really quiet and than started walking ahead of us. Was he jealous? How do guys especially shy ones act when they are jealous?

DEAL!!!!!! Sometimes miracles happen, right?

Thanks guys for your replies and carzy300, I read your posts all the time to see if I can get insight into my shy guy. Seems we are in the same boat- confused!!!!

A guy once told me that guys appreciate a girl who plays up her feminine side.What does that mean? How can I show my feminine side?

Can it be? Around everyone else it seems he extroverted, outgoing, fun and relaxed. Around me, he is quieter, awkward and freezes up. He stops and chit chats with other girls when he sees me he looks down and says nothing unless I say hi first. Basically, shy guy characteristics. Can a fun,non socially inept guy be shy or just assume he is uninterested?

Guys, do you ever talk about other girls in front of your crush to make her jealous? like saying how this one is hot in order to get a reaction?

I'm trying to understand why this guy I like would act a certain way.First of all, I can't figure out if he likes me or not anyways, at a party,we were hanging out a bit and he seemed like he liked me offering me some of his food, teasing me a bit, being real friendly and than this annoying friend of ours kept saying things like "oh, you guys should get together and go out" we both ignored her and than after a few comments like that she said "I feel there is a date in the make over here" and i got nervous and defensiveand was afarid maybe he would think i was after him and said "Well, I think you're imagining things" just to cover myself and try to relieve pressure off him if he felt it. Except....Three minutes later the guy got up and went to the other end of the room and didn't come back. Did i insult him or was he just not interested and was starting to feel pressured to ask me out and wanted an escape? How would you act? Is he intersted and i blew it? Or was he just trying to be friendly and than felt pressured

I am in the exact same boat, oneshygal! Good to know I'm not alone. My guy freezes on the spot in front of me, brushes by me without saying sanything and mumbling his hellos. Once in a while he will approach and do something that shows he likes me like covering my hand with his when passing me a plate but than he scares himself because he runs like the wind now whenever i approach. Shy guys...argh!!!!! And keep in mind he is an outgoing and fun guy around everyone but me...I think I make him nervous a result I'm nervous and hesitant to go near himb/c i have no idea how he will react!